Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues

[Ronish Baxter]

Depression is a part of our lives. The thing is how to deal with effectively so that it doesn't take a grip of your life. Depression may start with small things and eventually it gets to such a limit that people feel helpless and unable to express what they are feeling. The best thing is to confide on someone very close and speak about the issues. Family support matters a lot and the person in depression needs care and love from the near and dear ones.

[Andicis]

My issue is with anxiety, and it's a bit of a weird one.

About a year ago, I was ill, it was just a generic cold. However, after this I had noticed that one of my lymph nodes in my neck had become inflamed. The age demographic I'm in (20-24) Lymphoma is a relatively common type of cancer to contract, and this really triggered anxiety for me. I committed the cardinal sin of googling, and ever since I've gone through phases of compulsively believing I'm suffering from several different types of cancer. I'm not. This health anxiety has wound up with me feeling some real symptoms of it, and has had a real detriment to my energy levels and overall well being. 

The thing is, deep down I KNOW I'm exaggerating and nothing is wrong with me. However, I just can't shake the feeling. I can get myself worked up over it, even when I know I'm being ridiculous. In fact, I'm even slightly apprehensive with posting this.

On a separate note, this really is an excellent thread. I'm really glad people feel comfortable to share things on this forum, and I wish you all the best, don't suffer in silence! 

[A Ram for All Seasons]

5 hours ago, Andicis said:

My issue is with anxiety, and it's a bit of a weird one.

About a year ago, I was ill, it was just a generic cold. However, after this I had noticed that one of my lymph nodes in my neck had become inflamed. The age demographic I'm in (20-24) Lymphoma is a relatively common type of cancer to contract, and this really triggered anxiety for me. I committed the cardinal sin of googling, and ever since I've gone through phases of compulsively believing I'm suffering from several different types of cancer. I'm not. This health anxiety has wound up with me feeling some real symptoms of it, and has had a real detriment to my energy levels and overall well being. 

The thing is, deep down I KNOW I'm exaggerating and nothing is wrong with me. However, I just can't shake the feeling. I can get myself worked up over it, even when I know I'm being ridiculous. In fact, I'm even slightly apprehensive with posting this.

On a separate note, this really is an excellent thread. I'm really glad people feel comfortable to share things on this forum, and I wish you all the best, don't suffer in silence! 

I was born with a very slight curvature of the spine, and for 30 years I got along without any problems. Then one day one of my vertebrae started pressing on a nerve in my back. The problem is that this nerve is right next to the heart, and it also goes over the shoulder and round to the front. The result was that I had severe chest pains right next to my heart coupled with the sensation that I couldn't get my breath.

I was convinced that I was going to drop dead from a heart attack. One very hot day I collapsed at work and was taken off to hospital with a racing heart and high blood pressure. I also collapsed at the hairdressers a few weeks later. They did all the tests on my heart and found nothing.

It took me about six months at least to accept that the pain was coming from my back and not my heart. My solution was to become a swimming fanatic and go to the swimming baths regularly. The exercise was good for my back and it also proved I could exert myself physically without dropping dead. I still feel my back every day, but I have never had the racing pulse or hyperventilation again in the 30 years since then.

I have also had the suspected lymphoma thing too. It turned out to be caused by a large cyst that had formed in the void that was left where my branchial clefts or "gills" hadn't grown back properly when I was an embryo. They operated on it and it has been okay ever since.

[King Kevin]

6 hours ago, Andicis said:

My issue is with anxiety, and it's a bit of a weird one.

About a year ago, I was ill, it was just a generic cold. However, after this I had noticed that one of my lymph nodes in my neck had become inflamed. The age demographic I'm in (20-24) Lymphoma is a relatively common type of cancer to contract, and this really triggered anxiety for me. I committed the cardinal sin of googling, and ever since I've gone through phases of compulsively believing I'm suffering from several different types of cancer. I'm not. This health anxiety has wound up with me feeling some real symptoms of it, and has had a real detriment to my energy levels and overall well being. 

The thing is, deep down I KNOW I'm exaggerating and nothing is wrong with me. However, I just can't shake the feeling. I can get myself worked up over it, even when I know I'm being ridiculous. In fact, I'm even slightly apprehensive with posting this.

On a separate note, this really is an excellent thread. I'm really glad people feel comfortable to share things on this forum, and I wish you all the best, don't suffer in silence! 

This may sound strange but sometimes you have to accept that stress and anxiety is the cause of physical symptoms what you are experiencing is normal if that's the right word if you are stressed or anxious .

If you can beat the stress and anxiety the physical symptoms  will disadisappear. Not sure I have explained this very well but I hope it helps.  

[Coneheadjohn]

On 30/03/2018 at 03:34, Andicis said:

My issue is with anxiety, and it's a bit of a weird one.

About a year ago, I was ill, it was just a generic cold. However, after this I had noticed that one of my lymph nodes in my neck had become inflamed. The age demographic I'm in (20-24) Lymphoma is a relatively common type of cancer to contract, and this really triggered anxiety for me. I committed the cardinal sin of googling, and ever since I've gone through phases of compulsively believing I'm suffering from several different types of cancer. I'm not. This health anxiety has wound up with me feeling some real symptoms of it, and has had a real detriment to my energy levels and overall well being. 

The thing is, deep down I KNOW I'm exaggerating and nothing is wrong with me. However, I just can't shake the feeling. I can get myself worked up over it, even when I know I'm being ridiculous. In fact, I'm even slightly apprehensive with posting this.

On a separate note, this really is an excellent thread. I'm really glad people feel comfortable to share things on this forum, and I wish you all the best, don't suffer in silence! 

Well done posting,anxiety is bloody awful and people tend to look down their nose at it and you get ‘suck it up’ or ‘we’ve all got problems’etc.

I know I always bang on about it but you just have to do take a positive approach in whatever you do,do the basics well.

Eat well,exercise, do more of the stuff that makes you happy(the legal ones).

In terms of your health,get checked out if the Dr says your ok draw a line under it and move on,if you still feel like crap get a second opinion.Just be blunt with your GP.

Don’t worry about the things you’ve got no control of,try and do everything to the best of your ability and a little bit better every time you do it.

I don’t know mate,but if something’s getting you down like that you need to get in straight away and put it to rest.

If you’re ever up Woodseats way give us a shout,we’ll buy you a pint.

[Andicis]

33 minutes ago, coneheadjohn said:

Well done posting,anxiety is bloody awful and people tend to look down their nose at it and you get ‘suck it up’ or ‘we’ve all got problems’etc.

I know I always bang on about it but you just have to do take a positive approach in whatever you do,do the basics well.

Eat well,exercise, do more of the stuff that makes you happy(the legal ones).

In terms of your health,get checked out if the Dr says your ok draw a line under it and move on,if you still feel like crap get a second opinion.Just be blunt with your GP.

Don’t worry about the things you’ve got no control of,try and do everything to the best of your ability and a little bit better every time you do it.

I don’t know mate,but if something’s getting you down like that you need to get in straight away and put it to rest.

If you’re ever up Woodseats way give us a shout,we’ll buy you a pint.

Cheers for this! I went to the GP a few times, think they got sick of me and then I never really wanted to go back since! Worst thing about it is, my sister is a doctor, and she even tells me I'm being ridiculous! 

It just mixed up with the stress of first year of Uni, living alone and worrying about trivial things I suppose!

Sounds good!

[AmericanRam]

Been depressed a bit for past couple days as new relationship I'm in isn't going as well as would like it too.

Hopefully things will start to get better in regards to that sooner rather than later.

[ramblur]

Some weeks ago, when I was going through a particularly bad spell, I was on the phone to a friend when I said to her ' I wish I were a horse', and after a short pause followed up with 'knowing my fecking luck, I'd probably be reincarnated as me'. When the penny dropped, she burst out laughing, which set me off guffawing so heartily I thought I'd pulled a muscle in my side. Laughter's a great tonic - I'd be doomed without it.

[Mostyn6]

obviously, suicide and men's mental health is getting a lot of airtime at the moment. There's a storyline in one of the soaps, and in local news, a Derby County employee has set up a group to help men talk about depression etc.

It's probably still too taboo for many, and I imagine lots of people feel uncomfortable showing (perceived) weakness.

From my own experience, the first step is self awareness. I am convinced that until something clicked in my head, I would've been adamant I was okay and not suffering from any kind of low mood or depression or mental health issues. Then all of a sudden, I was aware that I was not okay.

One of the best things I ever did was create this thread. I play it down now, but at the time, I was utterly scrambled in the brain. Some of the responses, even the most obviously simplistic, pieced my brain back together. The best bit of advice being to add exercise to your routine.

I also am not aware of the part alcohol has to play in mental health, or at least in mine. I now no longer drink for drinking sake, there has to be an event (birthday, wedding etc) otherwise I won't have a reason to drink and I have be celebrating something to be drinking now, this has helped me immeasurably.

I hope the rest of the dcfcfans community is in good spirits and are coping well with life's challenges. If you need to vent or talk or just get a perspective, please, just blurt it out, there's nothing to lose, as one thing is for certain here, nobody will judge you badly, you will only feel compassion and support from other posters.

It's okay to not be okay X

[Ramshankered]

On 03/04/2018 at 20:57, AmericanRam said:

Been depressed a bit for past couple days as new relationship I'm in isn't going as well as would like it too.

Hopefully things will start to get better in regards to that sooner rather than later.

Stick with it mate. These things can just be teething issues as you try and get used to each other's habits, etc. 

I've been with my other half for six years now. The first 3-6 months were wobbly AF tho! 

[SaintRam]

15 minutes ago, Moist One said:

obviously, suicide and men's mental health is getting a lot of airtime at the moment. There's a storyline in one of the soaps, and in local news, a Derby County employee has set up a group to help men talk about depression etc.

It's probably still too taboo for many, and I imagine lots of people feel uncomfortable showing (perceived) weakness.

From my own experience, the first step is self awareness. I am convinced that until something clicked in my head, I would've been adamant I was okay and not suffering from any kind of low mood or depression or mental health issues. Then all of a sudden, I was aware that I was not okay.

One of the best things I ever did was create this thread. I play it down now, but at the time, I was utterly scrambled in the brain. Some of the responses, even the most obviously simplistic, pieced my brain back together. The best bit of advice being to add exercise to your routine.

I also am not aware of the part alcohol has to play in mental health, or at least in mine. I now no longer drink for drinking sake, there has to be an event (birthday, wedding etc) otherwise I won't have a reason to drink and I have be celebrating something to be drinking now, this has helped me immeasurably.

I hope the rest of the dcfcfans community is in good spirits and are coping well with life's challenges. If you need to vent or talk or just get a perspective, please, just blurt it out, there's nothing to lose, as one thing is for certain here, nobody will judge you badly, you will only feel compassion and support from other posters.

It's okay to not be okay X

It's always going to be a long road to see culture change. But you're absolutely right. For some people it can be difficult to find people to talk to; not only through concerns over seeming weak, but others not being willing to humor the idea there's something wrong. 

My current boss is about 70, very stubborn and stuck in his old ways. His ideas of many societal issues are basically the same as they were when he was 20. As such he doesn't even believe in the existence of mental health issues other than someone being "old style" insane. His input on finding out I suffered from depression was: "You know how to get over it, don't you? You just think of someone in a worse situation than you and you're happy."

So now when I need a day to myself I call in sick, saying I've got a stomach bug or something - because its easier for me to bear his patronising lectures about my bad diet than it is to be told to just get over my depression.

Threads like this, and groups etc. are so important for people who don't (currently) have access to someone to talk to in their every day life.

Edited May 11, 2018 by SaintRam

[DarkFruitsRam7]

Never had mental health issues and I don’t have them now. But just found out some terrible family news that will change everything I’ve ever known. Going to be extremely difficult to adjust to. Posting on here as this forum has some great people.

[RoyMac5]

47 minutes ago, BurtonRam7 said:

Never had mental health issues and I don’t have them now. But just found out some terrible family news that will change everything I’ve ever known. Going to be extremely difficult to adjust to. Posting on here as this forum has some great people.

Best thing you can do is speak about your 'news' and share it with people (perhaps even join a support group) - that will help you deal with it and realise you're not alone in what you're going through. Don't bottle it up. Take care of yourself too.

[Wolfie]

12 hours ago, RoyMac5 said:

Best thing you can do is speak about your 'news' and share it with people (perhaps even join a support group) - that will help you deal with it and realise you're not alone in what you're going through. Don't bottle it up. Take care of yourself too.

Stop it. It freaks me out when you start talking sense ?

[BobbyTheReadingFan]

Thought I'd post here as I had a Doctors appointment yesterday after quite a long spiral downwards to my current state.  For around 18 months I have VERY slowly slumped.  As each month ticked by I didn't really realise what was happening. 

I stopped going to the gym, I've put on 2.5 stone, and I drink too much.  I also rarely sleep well, maybe get 3-4 hours of broken sleep a night.  I'm very irritable, I don't have a social life, I prefer to just go home, turn my phone off and be alone.  

Depression is weird.  I feel like I'm floating around most of the time and an observer rather than a participant.  Even driving, it's like things are blurry and I'm like a zombie just sitting in a car which is moving along somehow. 

For the last 4 months it's got really bad and I did then notice that something wasn't right.  I've booked a counselling session for next Wednesday so I'm hoping that helps me.  

As I said I went to the GP yesterday.  I rarely ever have a good experience at the Doctor's, usually I find they are too busy, they don't really listen or I feel they want me to just leave so they can see the next person.  However, the Doctor I did see was fantastic.  Spent about 25 minutes with me, got me to complete a questionnaire thing and basically understood my current issues.  He said I would benefit from medication but it may be best to see how the counselling helps me, and he also gave me the number for their telephone counselling service where you get an hour phone call with someone per week.  

 

 

 

[Sith Happens]

1 minute ago, BobbyTheReadingFan said:

Thought I'd post here as I had a Doctors appointment yesterday after quite a long spiral downwards to my current state.  For around 18 months I have VERY slowly slumped.  As each month ticked by I didn't really realise what was happening. 

I stopped going to the gym, I've put on 2.5 stone, and I drink too much.  I also rarely sleep well, maybe get 3-4 hours of broken sleep a night.  I'm very irritable, I don't have a social life, I prefer to just go home, turn my phone off and be alone.  

Depression is weird.  I feel like I'm floating around most of the time and an observer rather than a participant.  Even driving, it's like things are blurry and I'm like a zombie just sitting in a car which is moving along somehow. 

For the last 4 months it's got really bad and I did then notice that something wasn't right.  I've booked a counselling session for next Wednesday so I'm hoping that helps me.  

As I said I went to the GP yesterday.  I rarely ever have a good experience at the Doctor's, usually I find they are too busy, they don't really listen or I feel they want me to just leave so they can see the next person.  However, the Doctor I did see was fantastic.  Spent about 25 minutes with me, got me to complete a questionnaire thing and basically understood my current issues.  He said I would benefit from medication but it may be best to see how the counselling helps me, and he also gave me the number for their telephone counselling service where you get an hour phone call with someone per week.  

 

 

 

Good luck for next week. For me one of the biggest step forwards was someone acknowledging I had an issue and that it wasnt just me.

 

[BobbyTheReadingFan]

3 minutes ago, Paul71 said:

Good luck for next week. For me one of the biggest step forwards was someone acknowledging I had an issue and that it wasnt just me.

 

Yes I know exactly what you mean.  For months I was telling myself something wasn't right.  Sounds weird but it was definitely a relief and nice to see that someone else agreed and could see my angst. 

 

 

 

[RamNut]

6 minutes ago, BobbyTheReadingFan said:

Thought I'd post here as I had a Doctors appointment yesterday after quite a long spiral downwards to my current state.  For around 18 months I have VERY slowly slumped.  As each month ticked by I didn't really realise what was happening. 

I stopped going to the gym, I've put on 2.5 stone, and I drink too much.  I also rarely sleep well, maybe get 3-4 hours of broken sleep a night.  I'm very irritable, I don't have a social life, I prefer to just go home, turn my phone off and be alone.  

Depression is weird.  I feel like I'm floating around most of the time and an observer rather than a participant.  Even driving, it's like things are blurry and I'm like a zombie just sitting in a car which is moving along somehow. 

For the last 4 months it's got really bad and I did then notice that something wasn't right.  I've booked a counselling session for next Wednesday so I'm hoping that helps me.  

As I said I went to the GP yesterday.  I rarely ever have a good experience at the Doctor's, usually I find they are too busy, they don't really listen or I feel they want me to just leave so they can see the next person.  However, the Doctor I did see was fantastic.  Spent about 25 minutes with me, got me to complete a questionnaire thing and basically understood my current issues.  He said I would benefit from medication but it may be best to see how the counselling helps me, and he also gave me the number for their telephone counselling service where you get an hour phone call with someone per week.  

 

 

 

I think its great that a fan from another club has posted on here. 

We can only offer support and advice based on experience. In my experience whenever someone withdraws excessively into their old world its a potentially bad situation. When i was young i used to come home and lock myself in my room, and looking back that wasn't a very healthy situation, but you don't necessarily even realise it. 

I'm not really sure that doctors and counsellors will ever provide solutions. Tablets might help some people to control excessive mood swings, and it can be good to talk,  but ultimately i think you just have to come out of the other end of the tunnel. Some problems just have to be buried like toxic waste and always have the potential to come back and polute your current situation. 

Its hard to generalise. Every situation is unique. But ultimately i think you have to take control of your life back from whatever is dragging you down.

[BobbyTheReadingFan]

1 minute ago, RamNut said:

I think its great that a fan from another club has posted on here. 

We can only offer support and advice based on experience. In my experience whenever someone withdraws excessively into their old world its a potentially bad situation. When i was young i used to come home and lock myself in my room, and looking back that wasn't a very healthy situation, but you don't necessarily even realise it. 

I'm not really sure that doctors and counsellors will ever provide solutions. Tablets might help some people to control excessive mood swings, and it can be good to talk,  but ultimately i think you just have to come out of the other end of the tunnel. Some problems just have to be buried like toxic waste and always have the potential to come back and polute your current situation. 

Its hard to generalise. Every situation is unique. But ultimately i think you have to take control of your life back from whatever is dragging you down.

Thanks RamNut, I came here just to find out your tactics before our first game and then let Paul Clement know what to expect.  ?  I've decided to stick around for a bit!  

I've had periods in my life when I have been low, usually after say 2-3 weeks it turns around for no real identifiable reason.  Although after four months and still no end in sight I thought I better address the situation.  I had counselling once before, about 7-8 years ago after a long term relationship ended.  That really helped.  

I think talking will help, to verbalise my thoughts and just to get some clarity. 

Thanks for your post and comments 

 

 

[RamNut]

1 minute ago, BobbyTheReadingFan said:

Thanks RamNut, I came here just to find out your tactics before our first game and then let Paul Clement know what to expect.  ?  I've decided to stick around for a bit!  

I've had periods in my life when I have been low, usually after say 2-3 weeks it turns around for no real identifiable reason.  Although after four months and still no end in sight I thought I better address the situation.  I had counselling once before, about 7-8 years ago after a long term relationship ended.  That really helped.  

I think talking will help, to verbalise my thoughts and just to get some clarity. 

Thanks for your post and comments 

 

 

Best wishes mate, apart from when we play you obviously ?

As for tactics tell PC we haven't got a clue. We change our manager every season. We change our strategy and team every year.

We'll probably name a 46 man squad for the game and turn up in a bendy bus.