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Urinal etiquette/unease ( again)


Boycie

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10 hours ago, Stive Pesley said:

I know the answer here

No one likes the kind of man who strides in - sees all 3 urinals vacant, and brazenly occupies the middle one. 

So if only the middle one is free, and you take it, that means the L & R wee-ers have already started and will undoubtedly finish before you

Leaving you stranded alone in the middle, looking to every lavatorial newcomer as if YOU are the type of man in the first example

No one wants to risk being seen as the accursed middle-widdler

 

 

Weirdly last night in the pub I went to the toilets and there were 5 urinals and 1 bloke ...who was using the middle one.

I almost made a comment; except a) I wasn't pissed enough by that point  b) I had this very thought that maybe he had been left high and dry by others.

I later ruminated that commenting on someone else's etiquette was even worse etiquette than their behaviour.

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8 hours ago, Boycie said:

Everyone surely pushes in the middle one while booming “room for a little one?” No?

Or asking, is this where all the big nobs hang out? 

On the other hand, why do people in car parks need to park right next to each other, even in an otherwise empty car park, I usually return to my car to find other cars parked all around it as close as they can get!!! 

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23 minutes ago, Eric the half a ram said:

Or asking, is this where all the big nobs hang out? 

On the other hand, why do people in car parks need to park right next to each other, even in an otherwise empty car park, I usually return to my car to find other cars parked all around it as close as they can get!!! 

Correct! Yes, another responce.

Please don’t get me started on sheep parking, I’ve parked at the deserted end of a car park before and returned to see a car parked at the side of me. Grrrr!

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6 hours ago, Eric the half a ram said:

Or asking, is this where all the big nobs hang out? 

On the other hand, why do people in car parks need to park right next to each other, even in an otherwise empty car park, I usually return to my car to find other cars parked all around it as close as they can get!!! 

Happened to us yesterday at that Carpet shop/screwfix combo on Ascot Drive.  2 other cars parked, room for maybe 20 more?
Not sure if the bay markings are visible or not (don't think they were?), but we parked up outside the carpet shop.  Came out and a car was so close, I was like...

2Kn.gif

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7 hours ago, Turk Thrust said:

With those urinals that slope down from one end, I never stand near the bottom end because that’s where it all sloshes down to. Always wait to stand at the top end

"Sloshes"? ?

Just how steep are the troughs you pizz in?  ?

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1 hour ago, Turk Thrust said:

Steep angle. And “Pizz”? Is that a cross between “piss” and “wazz”?

I simply assumed Forum gestapo would veto any attempts to type the word piss.  They better not had now though, seeing as you seem to have got away with it!  ?

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I always used to avoid the middle urinal when younger, in fear. 

As I've got older, and more confident (and accepted it is what it is), I just roll up in the middle now. I find if you do that it goes one extreme or the other, you earn the respect and people look at you like a real man or... they think you're a weirdo and whisper behind your back in the bar 

Edited by LERam
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I just use the middle one. I don’t get why blokes do this except I’m sure they must have a fear of a small ?

Im not saying I have anything worth shouting from the rooftops (I don’t lol) but I think it’s just weird that someone is too scared to use a urinalysis because someone is using the next one to it. People don’t have an issue with a small gap at a football stadium!!

 

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39 minutes ago, rammieib said:

I just use the middle one. I don’t get why blokes do this except I’m sure they must have a fear of a small ?

Im not saying I have anything worth shouting from the rooftops (I don’t lol) but I think it’s just weird that someone is too scared to use a urinalysis because someone is using the next one to it. People don’t have an issue with a small gap at a football stadium!!

 

This is true, we squeeze in when it’s football.
but!

have you seen the weirdos hanging around the cubicles waiting their time at half time? Not that many people need a poop at half time, plus, the seat will be as wet as a Forest fan when they signed Lingard.

Still weird.

(the author acknowledges that some people have genuine anxiety problems with being too close to people in intimate situations, and accepts that needs must in these situations) ((don’t cancel me))

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i am a cubicle "weirdo"  It's better for everyone, as i have trouble aiming, plus i like my privacy.

A little poem written on a cubicle wall suits me.

Hér er ró og hér er friður, hér vil ég setjast niður, hugsa mína þungu þanka, þar til einhver fer að banka, stend þá upp og sturta niður.

Here is peace and here is calm
Here I want to sit down
Think my heavy thoughts
Until someone knocks
Then I stand and flush em down

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