Would you offer to play for free? So Wayne can plan a bit, which famous player would you compare yourself to?

[WhiteHorseRam]

I shall get the ball rolling ...

 

Wayne - I am a bit like a fat Ray Parlour with a lot of swearing.

 

I could do about 10 minutes before collapsing.

[Curtains]

[Alph]

I see myself as an older Tom Huddlestone with the passing of Bradley Johnson. 

I'm 6ft 4" so I have an advantage in aerial duels which is sadly compromised by my fear of minor injuries. 

Ideal for defending opposition free kicks on the edge of the box I come with alarmingly low levels of enthusiasm for putting my body on the line. 

[Steve How Hard?]

I see myself as a good two footed player. Adept with both feet, unfortunately they both left feet. Put me down as Claude Davis reincarnated. 

[Bald Eagle's Barmy Army]

Is this like a shop window where we could potentially get a trial? 
 

I’ve wanted to play for this club for so long. If somebody can afford my plane ticket over from Montenegro I’ll show you how I won the ballon d oooor when I was just 6 years old. 

[Alph]

2 minutes ago, Steve How Hard? said:

I see myself as a good two footed player. Adept with both feet, unfortunately they both left feet. Put me down as Claude Davis reincarnated. 

Have you considered Davis was a very good player but was surrounded by even better players?

[JuanFloEvraTheCocu'sNesta]

I'm like Michael Owen.

Not the 18 year old banging worldies in against Argentina, but Michael Owen at 33 with two knackered knees and a leaflet telling everyone how great a signing he would be.

Where do I sign?

[Steve How Hard?]

1 minute ago, Alpha said:

Have you considered Davis was a very good player but was surrounded by even better players?

I would fit into that role very easily.

[MackworthRamIsGod]

I'm a bit like the Uruguayan fella with 1 arm, except is 1 leg, I've got a mean right foot though.

[RadioactiveWaste]

Dear Wayne,

I will play for free. I'm like a Craig Bryson. But fatter, slower, more injury prone, less stamina, less likely to get into the box, more likely to be a disaster in our own box, and with the commitment to physical exertion that rivals ikechi Anya. 

 

[dog]

A strolling Jan Molby without any footballing ability. On FM ratings the only thing I get more than 1 for is aggression

[Alph]

Should we be leaving contact details because all I'm seeing here is the makings of a League One dominating outfit. 

1 page in and already we have a solid spine of the squad

[Alph]

9 minutes ago, MackworthRamIsGod said:

I'm a bit like the Uruguayan fella with 1 arm, except is 1 leg, I've got a mean right foot though.

I don't mean to pry but is the right foot attached to the leg you have or

Edited May 14, 2022 by Alpha

[GboroRam]

I'm just a poo Ali Dia. 

[sage]

Slightly taller Bucko

[hintonsboots]

Gladys, still play five a side, but more like walking football.

[CornwallRam]

Put me down as Dave Langan. Competent conventional right-back with a bit of pace for the occasional overlap.

At least I was 25 years ago. I suspect Dave himself could outpace me now and he was on crutches last time I saw him.

[RipleyRich]

I would liken myself to Glen Hoddle

No, I  wouldn't play for free and I doubt any professional would pass up the chance of a paid contract out of any form of loyalty.

[RoyMac5]

2 minutes ago, RipleyRich said:

I would liken myself to Glen Hoddle

...

A bit of a religious crank?

Edited May 14, 2022 by RoyMac5

[RipleyRich]

1 minute ago, RoyMac5 said:

A bit of a religious crank?

Definitely not.......I might be inclined to play for free if I was guided by God.

I stopped having imaginary friends when I was about 5