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Mostyn6

Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues

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thanks for you concern, but I think I am far from that level.

Admittedly, I am a bit low at the moment, Christmas is always a bad time for me, but I hope that the good things in my life are enough to keep me on track.

There's no doubt that, in spite of never being diagnosed, I have been and probably still am 'clinically' depressed.

It became a question that kept me awake last night, whilst reflecting on a tough couple of years (which is not unique to me!), wondering how far away from being at rock bottom I am. It was a weird concept, as steps, and when there are no more steps down, is that where you find yourself wanting out.

I often contemplate the effects of ending it all, which is not the same as planning to end it all, if that makes sense.

I know it's a cruel world and I look at what others have been through and it trivialises everything I consider a problem in my own life, and the fact that I won't burden people with my own issues seems to fit in with lots of depression "frameworks" if you will.

I found myself just wondering where I was on the staircase of mental well-being. I worry that I could be only one or two more knocks from rock-bottom.

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Stephen's Fry documentary about being a manic depressive i found really helpful myself.  Insightful anyway. 

Apart from talking about it...if you can, exercise is about the best tip i can think of. 

And not blaming yourself for feeling bad or being unpleasant to others when you feel bad. 

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18 minutes ago, Mostyn6 said:

thanks for you concern, but I think I am far from that level.

Admittedly, I am a bit low at the moment, Christmas is always a bad time for me, but I hope that the good things in my life are enough to keep me on track.

There's no doubt that, in spite of never being diagnosed, I have been and probably still am 'clinically' depressed.

It became a question that kept me awake last night, whilst reflecting on a tough couple of years (which is not unique to me!), wondering how far away from being at rock bottom I am. It was a weird concept, as steps, and when there are no more steps down, is that where you find yourself wanting out.

I often contemplate the effects of ending it all, which is not the same as planning to end it all, if that makes sense.

I know it's a cruel world and I look at what others have been through and it trivialises everything I consider a problem in my own life, and the fact that I won't burden people with my own issues seems to fit in with lots of depression "frameworks" if you will.

I found myself just wondering where I was on the staircase of mental well-being. I worry that I could be only one or two more knocks from rock-bottom.

The worry is a factor in many cases also. The best thing to do is to make sure the people closest to you are aware, so they can keep an eye on you as well. 

Christmas is a hard time for a lot of people, for various reasons. 

Just remember, that while obviously you can't just decide to be happy, more of the factors that cause depression are under your control than you think. Exercise, or changing routines, even really small changes, can often be a big help (Changing your route to work, what you have for dinner if you have a fairly orderly system in place like some people do etc.).

I was a hardcore gamer when I was at my worst (and I still am now), and at my worst I was obviously in a very deep hole. I'd had a breakdown, left school, didn't talk to family members more than a couple of words a day etc. and my company, socially (on the games) was not constructive. My best friend at the time was in a similar boat mentally, but looking back in hindsight, his vast lack of effort to help himself coupled with being the only form of reference I had did me no good at all. 

So what I ended up doing (over the course of a year or so) was quite drastic. Talked to my family, went to a doctor, therapist etc. then turned off my computer for 9 months, got an internship at the company of a family friend (where I still work) and focused more on rebuilding my relationships with both my brothers, parents etc.

The change was quite quick, and while I'm not "better", I no longer have mood swings, anger issues etc. and it's made it far easier for me to have a clearer view of myself, my life and my mental state, which is important when battling the downward spirals.

Now I'm back playing my games etc. and have been doing much better for a few years now. 

I still have lingering issues, aside from depression as well as within it, but battling the element that may lead to you doing something foolish is 80% of the battle, in my opinion.

 

Clearly there's no right or wrong thing to do, and changing things in your life, little or large may not help. But making the people around you aware is always a benefit to both you and them, and should be a priority, if they don't already know. And if it's half-truths they know, you have to tell them the full-truths. 

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25 minutes ago, Mostyn6 said:

thanks for you concern, but I think I am far from that level.

Admittedly, I am a bit low at the moment, Christmas is always a bad time for me, but I hope that the good things in my life are enough to keep me on track.

There's no doubt that, in spite of never being diagnosed, I have been and probably still am 'clinically' depressed.

It became a question that kept me awake last night, whilst reflecting on a tough couple of years (which is not unique to me!), wondering how far away from being at rock bottom I am. It was a weird concept, as steps, and when there are no more steps down, is that where you find yourself wanting out.

I often contemplate the effects of ending it all, which is not the same as planning to end it all, if that makes sense.

I know it's a cruel world and I look at what others have been through and it trivialises everything I consider a problem in my own life, and the fact that I won't burden people with my own issues seems to fit in with lots of depression "frameworks" if you will.

I found myself just wondering where I was on the staircase of mental well-being. I worry that I could be only one or two more knocks from rock-bottom.

Hi Mostyn

I've lost a family member to this and nearly lost a good mate who was just saved by the 7th sense of his wife.

I hope you can take some comfort from the advice given elsewhere by others. Don't try to battle it on your own. Talk to professional people who will do all they can to make sure you get no worse. If you're already doing that, keep doing it.

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Thanks for sharing your posts SaintsRam, like others have said that took alot of courage.

I hit abit of a brick wall recently, my friend suggested dfepression but I think it's just generally feeling abit down. I've found myself drinking more, finding it harder to get up in the mornings and alot of lethargy at work. Was a big reason why I chose to sign off from my current job and look elsewhere. 

What usually makes me feel better is getting out and doing exercise, most notably sport. I've been entering competitions and the success (or even failure) from that gives me a huge raise.

II think this time of year has a big impact on alot of people, it certainly is for me; dreading Xmas. Every one of my friends/family are in serious relationships and I've been on my own for about 6 months. There's nothing worse than being the token single guy on nights out.

I'm pretty positive about what next year brings, and on the whole this has been a hugely successful year, but still doesn't sotp you feeling down in the dumps on occasion! 

EDIT: Of course following Forest can lead to bouts of extreme depression. 

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48 minutes ago, Gypsy Ram said:

It differs from person to person but I agree with you.

 

I have been in and out of depression and anxiety due to work/relationship stress.

 

I often hit the bottle hard when I can't cope/deal with my anxiety but that doesn't help at all.

 

But I found understanding why I am feeling that way and making a plan to address those reasons works. I have been through three bouts of it, and one very recently where my behaviour became so erratic

Stay strong mate... Like I say... I'm here  listen and chat whenever...

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If you have access to Stephen Ilari & co's study drom 2007, go and read it.

If you don't here are the guidelines:

Depressed patients were exposed to conditions mimicking ancestral environment; lot of sunlight, omega3 fatty acids, oudoor activities,time with friends and family and regular sleeping pattern.

Leading to 75 % recovery rate. So basicly it's the current lifestyle what causes it.

I'd add d-vitamin to it, as in the long run it does help recovery. If you do drink, stop it. 9/10 feels radically better after quitting drinking, no matter if that's been reason behind depression or just poor solution to it.

Quicker you do something for it, better. And I'd strongly suggest you to go see the doctor and do some tests!

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It's been said before but talking and excercise for me are the key tips.

About 10 years ago, I had a bout of mild to moderate depression but accompanied by quite bad anxiety and panic attacks, so that my "safe place" was curled up on the sofa. I would drink too much in the evenings to try and clear my mind but of course that didn't help & just disrupted my sleep even more. I used to think that my issues were brought on by ill health at the time, as I was suffering from chronic stomach problems but looking back, the underlying cause was that I was in denial about the demise of my first marriage - something which I only came to realise long after we'd split up and I'd met my second wife.

Of course, once I started talking to people (and found a sympathetic doctor) I was able to start to take control but excercise for me was crucial. Once I got over the anxiety of thinking I was going to die as soon as I could feel my heart racing, it really made all of the difference & I was able to reclaim my life over a period of a few months.

I still have occasional bouts of mild depression but they're thankfully brief and I have wonderful support nowadays.

In the cinema the other week, I felt the early signs of a panic attack coming on (it felt like I was sinking down into the seat). The first time I'd had that feeling in years and the weird thing was I felt strangely comforted by it - like it was a reminder to me of how bad I used to feel & how I'm in a far better place now. It quickly subsided & I've been fine since.

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2 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

In the cinema the other week, I felt the early signs of a panic attack coming on (it felt like I was sinking down into the seat). The first time I'd had that feeling in years and the weird thing was I felt strangely comforted by it - like it was a reminder to me of how bad I used to feel & how I'm in a far better place now. It quickly subsided & I've been fine since.

 

I had a similar event a month or so back, just when I started to feel like I used to. I told my friends, who all live in New Orleans and who have been my main social group since the tail end of my bad times, and they let out an onslaught that lasted a few hours describing to me the things I used to do and how much better I am now, and it made me feel so much better. As you say, it's comforting to be reminded of how far you've come. 

Another reason why it's so important for people to know.

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4 hours ago, LesterRam said:

good post, working online is notorious for depression and I have now been online my entire adult life and mostly on my own, if I can give advice on what I have found out with trial and error...

never use any device, laptop or anything that radiates light an hour before going to sleep, something about the blue light removes melatonin which enables you to sleep.

buy a sad lamp, they do work.

regular exercise, just go and take a brisk walk.

talk to colleagues and try and keep it upbeat.

never take work home with you, leave it in the office.

I can talk but if I have a lot of work on I will break all these rules and my mood deepens, probably hence my negative posts :unsure:

hope your ok Mostyn and please try my ideas mate because this is 20+ years research that works for me.

On the blue light point. Anyone can download a piece of software called f.lux for free.  It mirrors daylight and after two days or so of using it you are completely unaware that you are using it. Blue Light is a huge problem, even for people who don't think it is for them. I recommend everyone uses f.lux immediately. 

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14 minutes ago, Uptherams said:

On the blue light point. Anyone can download a piece of software called f.lux for free.  It mirrors daylight and after two days or so of using it you are completely unaware that you are using it. Blue Light is a huge problem, even for people who don't think it is for them. I recommend everyone uses f.lux immediately. 

Just need something similar for phones...

 

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This thread is strange timing. 

I'm struggling a bit now. Not told anyone how much and I think I'm behaving pretty upbeat wherever I go. Only a few on here have met me so this is a pretty perfect place to admit it and not effect anyone I know. 

Got tears in my eyes as I type this. lol

Struggling. 

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25 minutes ago, Alpha said:

This thread is strange timing. 

I'm struggling a bit now. Not told anyone how much and I think I'm behaving pretty upbeat wherever I go. Only a few on here have met me so this is a pretty perfect place to admit it and not effect anyone I know. 

Got tears in my eyes as I type this. lol

Struggling. 

one thing this thread has taught me is that I am not alone. It provides a bizarre kind a solace to me. I perked up the other night after filling in a load of forms. It was weird.

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42 minutes ago, Mostyn6 said:

one thing this thread has taught me is that I am not alone. It provides a bizarre kind a solace to me. I perked up the other night after filling in a load of forms. It was weird.

Yeah man. I've been reading the thread but not posted because I was wanting to keep feeding off it. But then the last post was on Tuesday at 3pm and I didn't want it to get lost. 

Would like to see people keep posting. 

Cheers.

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On 15 December 2015 at 15:15, AnimalisaRam said:

Just need something similar for phones...

 

Will says its avaliable for iPhone

Also says your device has to be jail broken, sounds a bit risky ..

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29 minutes ago, Alpha said:

Yeah man. I've been reading the thread but not posted because I was wanting to keep feeding off it. But then the last post was on Tuesday at 3pm and I didn't want it to get lost. 

Would like to see people keep posting. 

Cheers.

I hit a really low point on Monday when a close mate said something quite innocently to me, but I went hyper-sensitive and sent him a whatsapp message that took about 20 minutes to write, and I was a mess writing it too, I properly unloaded on him, and I'd say he didn't deserve it, as his intentions were good in the message he's sent me. But the low point kicked in when I then felt bad for burdening him with feelings, but in the message, I'd said he was my closest friend and if I couldn't discuss things with him, then there's something wrong.

Odd that I chose this forum to post the questions, I didn't even realise I was doing it! But it has been strangely therapeutic, and although it won't answer the questions I have (about my own mind), knowing I'm not a unique sufferer of feeling low.

I lay in bed wondering if this is the lowest I've ever felt, and if there is room to sink lower, and also, how long do you keep going, waiting for things to turn good, before you give up trying?

I had some knockbacks recently, and have picked myself up and dusted myself down, and from the outside, people think I've done amazing to be how I am right now, but inside, I still feel bitter, lonely and isolated.

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Most of my family had it. I was in the boat of people just wanting attention by saying oh I got depression. They take tablets how do tablets help I don't know.

 

I then thought I got it my self broke down on my mum (Awww) who had suffered with it and said I had it. At that point I had a lot of respect for people who do have it / had it as it's not easy. I still don't think it was proper depression more of a really bad time. Luckily I'm quite strong minded and know that most of it's in my head and eventually stopped feeling so down etc.

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