Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues

[AmericanRam]

And...back to square one.I just don't even care anymore; whatever happens happens.

[ilkleyram]

Not sure whether I should ask this question AR, but are you OK?

[Norman]

13 minutes ago, AmericanRam said:

And...back to square one.I just don't even care anymore; whatever happens happens.

Am I right in thinking this is you wanting a relationship more than anything else, going off your comments?

[Topram]

21 minutes ago, AmericanRam said:

And...back to square one.I just don't even care anymore; whatever happens happens.

Keep your head up mate! 

[Coneheadjohn]

On 10/08/2017 at 20:32, AmericanRam said:

And...back to square one.I just don't even care anymore; whatever happens happens.

What's going on mate?

Hope you're ok.

[Gypsy Ram]

Another world beater giving his life away:

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/cycling/steve-wooldridge-dead-suicide-dies-olympic-cyclist-gold-medallist-australian-a7893736.html

[Coneheadjohn]

20 hours ago, Gypsy Ram said:

Another world beater giving his life away:

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/cycling/steve-wooldridge-dead-suicide-dies-olympic-cyclist-gold-medallist-australian-a7893736.html

This just makes me sad,Thoughts with all his family and friends

 

[ronnieronalde]

When you wake up in the morning and you're looking for reasons not to wake up rather than reasons to wake up, you're in real trouble.

So many seemingly outwardly strong people struggle silently then see the only/best way out as giving up their own life. 

The frightening thing for me is knowing things like that happen make me personally even sadder and more frustrated/disappointed with the world.

Thankfully I'm too much of a coward to do anything about it and couldn't stomach the prospect of having somebody else have to cope with the consequences. It rips a little bit of my heart out of me each time I hear of someone who hasn't been able to keep on keeping on.

Poor buggers must have gone through hell.

[Ashz09]

Does Tablets actually help? I'm getting made redundant end of September with always feeling no one wants me. Been working by myself for the last year due to the Project coming to an end and being the only one able to do my job.

I've been under qualified for one job. Screwed up my latest interview applying for a 1st line of support job and talking about the Admin / Training stuff I've done in my current job. Obviously they thought I was more suited to that as that's all I spoke about! Instead of my 1st line skills.

Feeling useless all the time, Family never visit or are quite far away. Friends never visit and when trying to arrange to see them, something always happens, always the one making the effort.

Confidence is zero starting to feel like what's the point? Don't really want 1 to 1's really with Councillors etc. As I know my problem. I'm one of those people who are confidence based when I'm confident I'm amazing at work enjoy bouncing off people.. Praising them raising there spirits.. Not had it for a while I guess.

I think getting a new job will make me feel wanted I guess but needs to be the right Company (One who don't treat people like s****) and easily commutable and with a career ladder for progression. It's proving to be hard..

[Coneheadjohn]

1 hour ago, Ashz09 said:

Does Tablets actually help? I'm getting made redundant end of September with always feeling no one wants me. Been working by myself for the last year due to the Project coming to an end and being the only one able to do my job.

I've been under qualified for one job. Screwed up my latest interview applying for a 1st line of support job and talking about the Admin / Training stuff I've done in my current job. Obviously they thought I was more suited to that as that's all I spoke about! Instead of my 1st line skills.

Feeling useless all the time, Family never visit or are quite far away. Friends never visit and when trying to arrange to see them, something always happens, always the one making the effort.

Confidence is zero starting to feel like what's the point? Don't really want 1 to 1's really with Councillors etc. As I know my problem. I'm one of those people who are confidence based when I'm confident I'm amazing at work enjoy bouncing off people.. Praising them raising there spirits.. Not had it for a while I guess.

I think getting a new job will make me feel wanted I guess but needs to be the right Company (One who don't treat people like s****) and easily commutable and with a career ladder for progression. It's proving to be hard..

Doesn't sound great for you at the minute mate.

I'm no Doctor but my experience(son) is that they were no good in his case and doing something positive helped him,anything which put a smile on his face.

Friends are overrated,if they're not there for you now they're not your friends.

When you say you know your problem do you mean just employment?

Don't be to hard on yourself posting on here is a positive.

This is a good place to get stuff out.

[Mostyn6]

@Ashz09 that wasn't nice reading that mate, and I wish I knew you better so I could point out the good things in your life and perhaps give a bit of balanced perspective. That is not me making assumptions or even playing down your sadness and mind, but more in hope that there are some good parts of your life. Things to realise though, from an older guy, accept that work is rarely enjoyable, and even if it's enjoyable, the novelty wears off once you realise you MUST do it for survival! You cannot pick your family. You CAN pick your friends.

I know it sounds easier than it perhaps is, but I can safely say I've offloaded bad friends over the last 10 years, and strengthened friendships with those that are good friends. Maybe sounds conceited, but I used to knock about with blokes who would create an argument with me so they could have an excuse to drag up hurtful things. This was obviously (to me) their own insecurities and jealousy.

If you're young enough and free enough, re-visit your career goals. I wish I knew when I was younger, what I do now.

[Rev]

6 hours ago, Ashz09 said:

Does Tablets actually help? I'm getting made redundant end of September with always feeling no one wants me. Been working by myself for the last year due to the Project coming to an end and being the only one able to do my job.

I've been under qualified for one job. Screwed up my latest interview applying for a 1st line of support job and talking about the Admin / Training stuff I've done in my current job. Obviously they thought I was more suited to that as that's all I spoke about! Instead of my 1st line skills.

Feeling useless all the time, Family never visit or are quite far away. Friends never visit and when trying to arrange to see them, something always happens, always the one making the effort.

Confidence is zero starting to feel like what's the point? Don't really want 1 to 1's really with Councillors etc. As I know my problem. I'm one of those people who are confidence based when I'm confident I'm amazing at work enjoy bouncing off people.. Praising them raising there spirits.. Not had it for a while I guess.

I think getting a new job will make me feel wanted I guess but needs to be the right Company (One who don't treat people like s****) and easily commutable and with a career ladder for progression. It's proving to be hard..

You sound like me the last time I was made redundant.

It makes you question your self worth, I was 23 at the time, which I'd guess isn't far off your age now, not long in my first house, with a mortgage to pay, and with a kid to put through nursery.

It was so stressful, a man's employment defines them, or so I thought!

I hated the company that relocated my job, and fantasised about bringing them down, stupid as that sounds. 

Job lined up, then fell through, more despair! 

Wasn't necessary though, whatever your skills they're will be an agency that will take you on, even if you're doing a brain dead job short-term while planning for the future, you will find work that keeps your head above water, believe me.

You'll come to realise to work to live, not live to work, and if you're determined enough this is just a bump in the road.

Final thought on your friends, if they know about your situation they'll keep their distance, not wanting you to spend money they assume you don't have to spend time with them, so don't be too hasty/harsh on how you judge them, they may be thinking of your best interests!

Sorry for the long post, but you're one of the people on here I'd reach out to when they're struggling, you seem a great person.

Good luck. 

p.s. why don't you post your skills and experience up on here, you never know who's reading it after all!

 

 

[ronnieronalde]

This. Every single day.

http://www.msn.com/en-gb/health/mindandbody/how-to-recognise-high-functioning-anxiety/ar-AAq4v0h?li=AAmiR2Z&ocid=spartanntp

 

 

[Ashz09]

16 hours ago, coneheadjohn said:

Doesn't sound great for you at the minute mate.

I'm no Doctor but my experience(son) is that they were no good in his case and doing something positive helped him,anything which put a smile on his face.

Friends are overrated,if they're not there for you now they're not your friends.

When you say you know your problem do you mean just employment?

Don't be to hard on yourself posting on here is a positive.

This is a good place to get stuff out.

That's what I thought, Think I choose the wrong set of Friends over the other when I was younger and regret it. Might be because I live Alvo and they live in Chad all of them drive though!

I was thinking the same I do know my problem but finding it hard to sort out. Employment and Home life in general I guess. My old bosses knew how to handle me. They'd praise me and I'd feel wanted I went on to achieve a lot of things I never thought I would. Presenting in front of a lot of people beaming with confidence etc.

After a year I have no confidence, no self worth, not sure if I'm capable or not. In the Interviews I was mentioning the things I was bad at rather then the things I was good at. Guess as soon as I get a job which I enjoy and being around people again I'll be fine.

Good thing is the relationship I'm in is quite good at the moment and my Daughter makes life worth baring..

16 hours ago, Moist One said:

@Ashz09 that wasn't nice reading that mate, and I wish I knew you better so I could point out the good things in your life and perhaps give a bit of balanced perspective. That is not me making assumptions or even playing down your sadness and mind, but more in hope that there are some good parts of your life. Things to realise though, from an older guy, accept that work is rarely enjoyable, and even if it's enjoyable, the novelty wears off once you realise you MUST do it for survival! You cannot pick your family. You CAN pick your friends.

I know it sounds easier than it perhaps is, but I can safely say I've offloaded bad friends over the last 10 years, and strengthened friendships with those that are good friends. Maybe sounds conceited, but I used to knock about with blokes who would create an argument with me so they could have an excuse to drag up hurtful things. This was obviously (to me) their own insecurities and jealousy.

If you're young enough and free enough, re-visit your career goals. I wish I knew when I was younger, what I do now.

I know what you mean I had a friend for a good 22 years. Went on a night out with him. He ended up spitting on me multiple times, So thought f*** this then spit on him back. Came over and punched me (Both drunk and he's on Steroids so thought better not fight back) didn't talk to him since.

I'm one of those Friends who actually try make People laugh and raise there spirits. Sometimes make a fool out of myself to make them laugh. Seems I should of been a c*** to them might of had more then!

Just turned 30 and brought a COMPTia A+ and N+ courses to try get into I.T. as I've loved I.T since a young age and enjoy it. I'm hoping being made redundant in some ways helps me get some training to be a I.T. full on nerd!

11 hours ago, reveldevil said:

You sound like me the last time I was made redundant.

It makes you question your self worth, I was 23 at the time, which I'd guess isn't far off your age now, not long in my first house, with a mortgage to pay, and with a kid to put through nursery.

It was so stressful, a man's employment defines them, or so I thought!

I hated the company that relocated my job, and fantasised about bringing them down, stupid as that sounds. 

Job lined up, then fell through, more despair! 

Wasn't necessary though, whatever your skills they're will be an agency that will take you on, even if you're doing a brain dead job short-term while planning for the future, you will find work that keeps your head above water, believe me.

You'll come to realise to work to live, not live to work, and if you're determined enough this is just a bump in the road.

Final thought on your friends, if they know about your situation they'll keep their distance, not wanting you to spend money they assume you don't have to spend time with them, so don't be too hasty/harsh on how you judge them, they may be thinking of your best interests!

Sorry for the long post, but you're one of the people on here I'd reach out to when they're struggling, you seem a great person.

Good luck. 

p.s. why don't you post your skills and experience up on here, you never know who's reading it after all!

 

 

I'm in the same boat. Mortgage which benefits don't cover and takes a long time to get help with. More worry. Luckily I've paid off my Credit cards and got basic bills to pay (Other than my £7,000 solar panels I got ripped off with!!!)

The rejection I hate the most. I've even changed my CV to say that i'm 1st line of support in Mobile Devices but want to move on to PC support. As Companies are ringing me up for PC roles (Which is what I want to do!)

I keep being told about agencies and that don't go to them due to pay etc. But a lot of unskilled people I've spoke to got into great jobs because of agencies so might be worth it I think. 

Not spoke to them for a while so don't think they do. See them now and again in random places and mention we should meet up but never does unless I make the effort. Even when I do usually just ignore me around the day. Made quite a few work mates but there redundant now and live far away! Grrr. I'll post my Skills etc seperatly sorry if it's long. 

[Ashz09]

Devices (PDAs / Android phones / Samsung tablets)

Set up new devices

Allocate members to gangs and assign device’s to gangs

Set up hands free Bluetooth connection in fleet vehicles

Maintain Message Manager system

Provide training to new device users during their induction

Provide any refresher training on site

Provide training for new device developments

First line of support for any device queries

Control the stock levels of licences, devices and accessories

Log issues with IT mobile phone department

Produce user guides for the devices in the form of video tutorials, booklets, visio, powerpoint presentations.

 

Corona

Produce and distribute reports:

1)      Quarterly PDA User Compliance Score Report

2)      Weekly compliance reports for new users and low scoring users

3)      Update and distribute Mobile Contact List monthly

4)      Monthly Events Report

5)      Gang Tracking Reports when requested

6)      Send out Leicester Leads Audit reports when requested

·         Maintain the gazateer tables

Schedule and dispatch tasks to gangs as required

Manage and update gang lists

Create new members and gangs

Configure and maintain audits

Create private jobs when required

Set up new stock locations when required

 

Other Project Requirements

Attend safety meetings representing the business systems team

Provide absence cover for office manager, distribute the relevant timekeeper extracts

 

Shared Responsibilities

·         First line of support for any queries and training for all relevant business systems

·         Logging issues with the software providers if the problem cannot be solved.

Provide data for other users to analyse and report with

·         Discover development ideas

Maintain the shared mailbox

Support new developments by testing, trialling, implementing and training

---------------

This was created on my part by my Manager with my skills etc. Kind of makes me feel proud. Unfortunately still doesn't get me the job I want. I guess I've only had 2 interviews but.. I don't know. 

[GboroRam]

24 minutes ago, Ashz09 said:

Devices (PDAs / Android phones / Samsung tablets)

Set up new devices

Allocate members to gangs and assign device’s to gangs

Set up hands free Bluetooth connection in fleet vehicles

Maintain Message Manager system

Provide training to new device users during their induction

Provide any refresher training on site

Provide training for new device developments

First line of support for any device queries

Control the stock levels of licences, devices and accessories

Log issues with IT mobile phone department

Produce user guides for the devices in the form of video tutorials, booklets, visio, powerpoint presentations.

 

Corona

Produce and distribute reports:

1)      Quarterly PDA User Compliance Score Report

2)      Weekly compliance reports for new users and low scoring users

3)      Update and distribute Mobile Contact List monthly

4)      Monthly Events Report

5)      Gang Tracking Reports when requested

6)      Send out Leicester Leads Audit reports when requested

·         Maintain the gazateer tables

Schedule and dispatch tasks to gangs as required

Manage and update gang lists

Create new members and gangs

Configure and maintain audits

Create private jobs when required

Set up new stock locations when required

 

Other Project Requirements

Attend safety meetings representing the business systems team

Provide absence cover for office manager, distribute the relevant timekeeper extracts

 

Shared Responsibilities

·         First line of support for any queries and training for all relevant business systems

·         Logging issues with the software providers if the problem cannot be solved.

Provide data for other users to analyse and report with

·         Discover development ideas

Maintain the shared mailbox

Support new developments by testing, trialling, implementing and training

---------------

This was created on my part by my Manager with my skills etc. Kind of makes me feel proud. Unfortunately still doesn't get me the job I want. I guess I've only had 2 interviews but.. I don't know. 

I'd say if you can turn the list into a narrative. Focus on what the business benefited from (turn it into a story how you worked with the company, your understanding of the business drivers, working to deliver the solutions they rely on). For example I'd change the "attended h&s meetings" to "worked with site h&s team to ensure safety protocols are followed" or "have a good understanding of site health and safety procedures and attended regular meetings to ensure blah blah blah". Just reshape it a bit. Also avoid jargon that doesn't translate away from your employer - the Leicester Leads report might be really important but you need to describe the end result and what you did to ensure it happened.

Hope that helps. Drop me a PM if you want my thoughts. I'm an IT manager and I've read loads of CVs and I would give you my honest thoughts, positive and "areas for improvement"

And don't get despondent after 2 goes. It takes time to get a good match, both as an employer and an employee. 

[Coneheadjohn]

@Ashz09,I'm afraid I can't help you with career advice as your skills are well out of my league.

When it comes to dealing with stressful situations,people,putting things in perspective and being positive,my experiences or opinion might(I stress the might part)be of use.

I like the fact that you say your relationship is good and you have a daughter you love,I assume you're in good health.

You have some people,family/friends who care for you?

These are all the most important things.

Obviously you need a change of fortunes financially and career wise,stay positive and don't give up.

Unfortunately you learn a lot more when bad things happen than good,this will make you stronger in the future.

I have a fairly boring predictable list of things I reach out for when I need a bit of motivation or cheering up.

I won't bore you,just try and do something to put a smile on your face and don't beat yourself up.

[Ashz09]

7 hours ago, GboroRam said:

I'd say if you can turn the list into a narrative. Focus on what the business benefited from (turn it into a story how you worked with the company, your understanding of the business drivers, working to deliver the solutions they rely on). For example I'd change the "attended h&s meetings" to "worked with site h&s team to ensure safety protocols are followed" or "have a good understanding of site health and safety procedures and attended regular meetings to ensure blah blah blah". Just reshape it a bit. Also avoid jargon that doesn't translate away from your employer - the Leicester Leads report might be really important but you need to describe the end result and what you did to ensure it happened.

Hope that helps. Drop me a PM if you want my thoughts. I'm an IT manager and I've read loads of CVs and I would give you my honest thoughts, positive and "areas for improvement"

And don't get despondent after 2 goes. It takes time to get a good match, both as an employer and an employee. 

Thanks for the advice GBoro. That was written as part of the Redundancy to keep me in my job. Thankfully my CV goes into more detail (Not too much) and talks about me a lot more. Don't really want to spam the thread if I can haha. I'll drop you a CV through PM for your thoughts if that's ok. Would really appreciate it.

Been told that my Redundancy is end of August and I don't need to work my 4 weeks notice which is nice of them. So got a Month and a half to find a job! (Could survive on benefits and go into education though to get qualifications etc).

6 hours ago, coneheadjohn said:

@Ashz09,I'm afraid I can't help you with career advice as your skills are well out of my league.

When it comes to dealing with stressful situations,people,putting things in perspective and being positive,my experiences or opinion might(I stress the might part)be of use.

I like the fact that you say your relationship is good and you have a daughter you love,I assume you're in good health.

You have some people,family/friends who care for you?

These are all the most important things.

Obviously you need a change of fortunes financially and career wise,stay positive and don't give up.

Unfortunately you learn a lot more when bad things happen than good,this will make you stronger in the future.

I have a fairly boring predictable list of things I reach out for when I need a bit of motivation or cheering up.

I won't bore you,just try and do something to put a smile on your face and don't beat yourself up.

My Family do but mostly live in Chad too. I have my Father which I enjoy being around who's quite close but he's not really a Child person so I try and not visit him as much lol.

I try and eliminate stress and deal with it when I can. Me and my Partner talk a lot more now and try make each other happy which works.

That's the key is what makes me happy. I've also got a list of what does.. Even in these dark times at least I kind of know how to cure it. It's simple just needs to happen. It's nice talking on here though as sometimes I'd love to put it on FB but then you get judged by people you know. Can imagine a lot taking the piss. Why this thread is so great!

[Wolfie]

Erm...

Wrong thread.

As you were....

Edited August 17, 2017 by Wolfie

[Coneheadjohn]

33 minutes ago, Ashz09 said:

Thanks for the advice GBoro. That was written as part of the Redundancy to keep me in my job. Thankfully my CV goes into more detail (Not too much) and talks about me a lot more. Don't really want to spam the thread if I can haha. I'll drop you a CV through PM for your thoughts if that's ok. Would really appreciate it.

Been told that my Redundancy is end of August and I don't need to work my 4 weeks notice which is nice of them. So got a Month and a half to find a job! (Could survive on benefits and go into education though to get qualifications etc).

My Family do but mostly live in Chad too. I have my Father which I enjoy being around who's quite close but he's not really a Child person so I try and not visit him as much lol.

I try and eliminate stress and deal with it when I can. Me and my Partner talk a lot more now and try make each other happy which works.

That's the key is what makes me happy. I've also got a list of what does.. Even in these dark times at least I kind of know how to cure it. It's simple just needs to happen. It's nice talking on here though as sometimes I'd love to put it on FB but then you get judged by people you know. Can imagine a lot taking the piss. Why this thread is so great!

It's really difficult isn't it mate?

I always try and not panic when things go to s****.

I would imagine that would be at the end of your 4 week redundancy.

All these things look easy written down but when you're in the middle of a drama there's nothing worse.

Amazingly for a Derby County forum there's some great people on here who can articulate things much better than me.

Keeps us posted mate,be no one happier for you than me when things turn round.