Dimmu

notts forest. The gift that keeps on giving, so I decided to make a bit more popcorn than usual.

Why TF did I just laugh at that?
Sicko!  😲

They will probably dock points from us for putting them in that situation 😛 

notts forest. The gift that keeps on giving, so I decided to make a bit more popcorn than usual.

notts forest. The gift that keeps on giving, so I decided to make a bit more popcorn than usual.

Pride Park Stadium
KO - 12.30
Ticket Update: Forgeddaboutit
Match is  also live on Sky Sports
What it is to be a Derby fan. After Northampton, even yours truly was feeling a tad deflated. With Blackpool, Pompey and Wycombe next up, my mood was more pensive and hopeful, than upbeat, as many others seemed to feel that we'd blown another golden opportunity. In fairness, that was understandable, if only to a point. Happily though, it appears that Warne and the chaps did not get the memo informing them of their impending capitulation and decided to go on an 5 game unbeaten run instead. That effort not only cemented us in the top 2, as others buckled under pressure, but now sees us teetering right on the edge of promotion glory; agonisingly poised, we have one foot in the sunlit uplands of the Championship (*shudder), the other remaining firmly planted in the nightmarish possibility of yet more play-off induced football terrors. But need we really be worried? 
After recent history and the near demise of our great club, I think it's understandable that some Derby fans might adopt a mildly cautious outlook and demeanour. In recent years, whatever may go wrong, typically has done and in so much, it's fair to say that a robust constitution is a mandatory requirement for a group of fans who've had more than their fair share share of emotional kickings over the last decade. Most Rams will confess that in some ways, it's hard not to expect the worst, based on recent history, but then isn't the dream what it's all about? After all, if you strip away the hopes and dreams, what do you really have left? It's been a season to test our nerves, that much is clear, but despite a lot of infighting, we've hung it all together in the end and here we are, fate firmly in our own hands. Remember too, that for some of our young 'uns, Saturday is a potentially momentous day. Automatic promotions don't come around every year and many won't have experienced one in their lives to date and for our elder statesmen and women, this could be an emotional roller coaster too. 
Outside the club itself, expectations are sky high. The bookmakers have all but closed the book on our promotion chances and after all, a single point is all we require against a Carlisle side who remain 10 points adrift at the very foot of the table and with seemingly nothing other than professional pride at stake. The oddsmakers are undoubtedly right from a statistical standpoint, but playing devil's advocate for a moment, Carlisle will view this as a free hit and will play without pressure (think Wycombe) and for some, the game provides an ideal opportunity to showcase their talents in a high-profile game with the Sky cameras watching on. Summer moves may beckon, for any player who shines.
Worthy favourites then, IMHO, but doubtless a good few will still be anxiously awaiting Saturday's outcome.
Not me mind. I’ll be drunk from @noon on Wednesday.
The Permutations:
Quite simple now, on paper at least; a win or a draw and we say, 'hasta la visa, baby' and kiss this league goodbye, hopefully forever. A loss, by a single goal would leave Bolton needing to beat Posh 3-0 in order to break the hearts of the Rams faithful, snatching 2nd place by virtue of having scored more goals. Not quite the proverbial slam-dunk then, but we're strong favourites, all the same and rightly so IMO.
Elsewhere, we, along with Bolton, will be hoping Posh slip up midweek; Posh will be hoping they don't and Barnsley and Lincoln will be nervously looking over their shoulders with both Oxford and Blackpool snapping at their heels. I'd dearly love to see Blackpool snatch the last playoff slot! 
 


The key fixtures for the final rounds, with promotion hopefuls underlined, are as below:
Tuesday 23/04-2024
Cheltenham vs Peterborough - 19.45
Saturday 27/04/2024
Barnsley vs Northampton - 12.30
Exeter vs Oxford - 12.30
Lincoln Vs Portsmouth - 12.30
Peterborough vs Bolton - 12.30
Reading Vs Blackpool - 12.30
My guesses are Posh to beat Cheltenham and draw with Bolton. Barnsley to beat Northampton, Oxford to turn over Exeter, Lincoln and Pompey to draw and Blackpool to beat Reading. Make of that what you will! 
Our Opponents – A Brief History:
Founded in 1896 as Shaddongate United, Carlisle United Football Club is a professional association football club based in Cumbria, who have played their home games at Brunton Park since 1909. The club's traditional kit is blue with white and red detail, whilst the badge takes elements from the city's coat of arms by including two Wyverns. They are nicknamed the "Blues", due to their kit, as well as the "Cumbrians". The club is the northernmost English professional football club seated close to the Anglo-Scottish border. Crowned Lancashire Combination, Division Two champions in 1906–07, they entered the North Eastern League in 1910 and went on to win the league title in 1921–22, before being elected into the Football League in 1928. 
Head to Head:
Sadly, Carlisle have a pretty decent record against our beloved Rams. Twenty-three competitive fixtures have seen Derby win 9, draw 6 and lose 8. Our first fixture, in the old Division 3 North back in 1955, saw Derby win 3-0. More recently, the two teams have met three time in the last decade with Derby bookending the decade with 2-0 wins, with a 1-1 between them.
Games Played: 23
Games Won:9
Games Drawn:6
Games Lost:8
Our last Meeting:
The corresponding fixture at Brunton Park was way back in September with a James Collins brace giving the game a rather more comforting veneer than was perhaps warranted. Carlisle looked tidy and Gibson and Moxon in particular, gave Derby plenty to think about. On that performance, you might have been forgiven for thinking Carlisle would do ok this season, but it’s fair to say that things have not gone well for the Cumbrian outfit and their relegation was a formality from some way out.
Carlisle United - Recent Form:
Carlisle's recent form has been distinctly patchy, with their last 5 games comprising a 3-1 home loss to that awful club near Henley, another home loss by the odd goal to Blackpool, a hard-earned away win at Cheltenham, before consecutive losses to Northampton and Lincoln. 
Saturday 20th April
Carlisle United 1 Wycombe Wanderers 3
Saturday 13th April
Carlisle United 0 Blackpool 1
Tuesday 9th April
Cheltenham Town 0 Carlisle United 1
Saturday 6th April
Northampton Town 2 Carlisle United 0
Monday 1st April
Carlisle United 1 Lincoln City 3
Carlisle United - Key Players:
Quite a relief that we won’t be facing Owen Moxon, snapped up by Pompey in the January window. Most of what was good about Carlisle seemed to start with him, but in Jordan Gibson, they still retain some meaningful threat. He's tricky with ball at feet, looks to attack and has a shot on him. He tops the scorer’s chart with 7 goals and 3 assists whilst Sam Lavelle with 4 assists is a goal provider to note. Mellish with 5 goals and Butterworth and Garner with 4 a piece, round out the principal Carlisle goal threats. it would be remiss not to mention also that their current manager, is none other than the much respected, Paul Simpson. Nudge, nudge, wink wink, Paul! The other ex-Rams fun fact would be that Luke Plange had a brief and unremarkable spell with the Cumbrians this season, before seeking warmer weather with HJK Helsinki.
Rams Team News:
Some will be itching for change after a stuttering performance at Cambridge. My own thoughts on that game are that Cambridge fought ridiculously hard and we had to try and match that extreme intensity before we could even think about playing our game. The pitch looked both short and narrow to me had clearly been subject to a hosepipe ban and I think all of these factors led to a feisty and extremely combative game, from which we did well to emerge with maximum points. Back on home soil, a larger pitch and a (marginally) better surface, I’d expect us to look rather more fluid.
Sadly, this will be the last time we get to watch young Max Bird play for the club. There’s been some really silly stuff written about our most technically gifted footballer and I have to confess that seeing him leave for Brizzle will be like a kick to the gut. That said, the fee garnered enabled some key signings and it could be argued that in hindsight, this was smart business. Nah, I'm not convinced either, but needs must? Quite possibly. Irrespective, I’d love to see him among the starting 11 for his swansong. I’m sure the Derby faithful will give him the send-off he deserves, in what may be a somewhat bittersweet celebration, for both us as fans and Max himself, lest we forget.
With that in mind, here’s my team selection, which will of course in no way resemble the gaffer’s:
 

 

The defence really needs to remain unchanged. A more determined and obdurate back 3 you’d struggle to find. Wildsmith retains the #1 jersey, despite some idiosyncratic ball distribution. To my way of thinking, he makes saves that matter and that outweighs his wayward passing.
I’ve drafted in Bird to replace Korey Smith, who would perhaps be hard done by should Warne follow suit. Max would partner the irrepressible Ebou Adams, a pairing that ought to give us a solid foundation in midfield. Working hard on the flanks, I’d have Wilson and Sibley, two players I absolutely love. The latter especially, has really matured over the course of the season, proving yours truly and others wrong in the process and he has oodles of ability if this progress and work ethic can be maintained.
Thommo is also retained and will hopefully sit a little higher and rat like his life depends on it. He and Collo put in Herculean shifts against Cambridge, doing the work that seldom attracts the plaudits, but is often key to our success. He can also interchange with a front two of Collo and Nate, who should give Carlisle plenty to think about. Barks, Gayle and Smith appear the obvious change-ups, with Hourihane, Vickers and Elder in reserve, but much will depend on who is truly healthy on the day.
And that, ladies and gentlemen is me done for the season. I’m fancying us for a decent performance, with a little style on show after an early goal to settle the nerves. 3-0 is the call with Collo, Nate and Sibs my fancies as the scorers. After some 55 games across the season, this one has definitely felt like something of a marathon, but in spite of the divided fan base, I’ve enjoyed seeing us tough it out. The football has been mildly bipolar, great one week, not so much the next, but I think all sides at this lowly level are inconsistent, only us and Pompey slightly less so than the others. Should we progress, of course we will face different challenges, but we will also have a very different playing roster. Doubts about the style of football will persist, but personally, I don't think Clowes will even contemplate letting Warne go and as such, Warne will retain my support until such time as he doesn't! 
Here’s hoping then,  for a resounding win, a respectful but joyous celebration of an important and healing day for all connected with the club and one that the majority can safely enjoy. Also, calm and stress-free journeys for any fans travelling significant distances and a bright and shiny, new future for Derby County Football club.
COYR
BE MORE B4
 

Celebrations, eh? Well, I know how to party!
I'll make a bold step from my armchair to the fridge and get my non-alcoholic beer.
If I totally lose it, I'll clap on my way. Quietly though, so I won't cause any distress to my neighbours.
 

Hi Duracell, we have a pair of ideal seats for you, we picked the seats because we're close to friends on the opposite side of the aisle.
We're stair 41, row kk, seats 398,399 immediately next to the aisle in the lower east in line with the edge of the centre circle on the south stand side of the half way line. Row kk is about 4 rows down from the entry stairs and the seats are on the right as you walk down to them.
We could meet you at the bottom of stair 41 in the concourse or you can just let me know your seat numbers.

Celebrations, eh? Well, I know how to party!
I'll make a bold step from my armchair to the fridge and get my non-alcoholic beer.
If I totally lose it, I'll clap on my way. Quietly though, so I won't cause any distress to my neighbours.
 

Celebrations, eh? Well, I know how to party!
I'll make a bold step from my armchair to the fridge and get my non-alcoholic beer.
If I totally lose it, I'll clap on my way. Quietly though, so I won't cause any distress to my neighbours.
 

Celebrations, eh? Well, I know how to party!
I'll make a bold step from my armchair to the fridge and get my non-alcoholic beer.
If I totally lose it, I'll clap on my way. Quietly though, so I won't cause any distress to my neighbours.
 

He’s just too good to be true 
Can’t take our eyes off Ebou
Du-du, du-du, du, du, du,du etc

Suits to martyrdom narrative. I'm pretty sure that dangerous telly, who allegedly assaulted during the game, is going to be sued next.

You lot have a short memory.
 
When the going gets tough, you turn to Waggy. He'll find his unstoppable inner beast for the most meaningful matches. Maybe a bit of help from the other unsung hero and footballing genius, Marlon Pack.

You lot have a short memory.
 
When the going gets tough, you turn to Waggy. He'll find his unstoppable inner beast for the most meaningful matches. Maybe a bit of help from the other unsung hero and footballing genius, Marlon Pack.

You lot have a short memory.
 
When the going gets tough, you turn to Waggy. He'll find his unstoppable inner beast for the most meaningful matches. Maybe a bit of help from the other unsung hero and footballing genius, Marlon Pack.

For the championship Cash, Nelson, Ward, Smith, Adams, NML, CBT.
Bench Barks, Sibs, Thompson.
Prems too far away would have to see how they'd get on in the Champ first.

It's not the first time someone has spied at the Moor Farm. 

I enjoyed the game.
Perfect footballing weather, two good teams giving their all with a short Leicester cameo (even though ill-timed ). Such goals and (mostly their) misses that both sets of fans can speculate about the result. 
I loved the tactical nuances, especially the second half which some didn't enjoy. Wonderstrike ruined an otherwise awesome show of how to control the game without a ball. 

I raise my hat to two things especially: 
Firstly Pompey, they are worthy champions and they played like one. See you next season!

Secondly, Collins. The footballing world is full of neymars, yet it desperately needs more collos. After such an injury to be able to play already is incredible, but to play a dropping nine with such a work rate... Incredible times 10. 
 

I enjoyed the game.
Perfect footballing weather, two good teams giving their all with a short Leicester cameo (even though ill-timed ). Such goals and (mostly their) misses that both sets of fans can speculate about the result. 
I loved the tactical nuances, especially the second half which some didn't enjoy. Wonderstrike ruined an otherwise awesome show of how to control the game without a ball. 

I raise my hat to two things especially: 
Firstly Pompey, they are worthy champions and they played like one. See you next season!

Secondly, Collins. The footballing world is full of neymars, yet it desperately needs more collos. After such an injury to be able to play already is incredible, but to play a dropping nine with such a work rate... Incredible times 10. 
 

Adams Park Stadium
Wednesday, April 10th – Kick-Off: 19.45
Still a full week to go before another match to savour, this time against a club who can sensibly lay claim to having the greatest car park in all of football. So, what is there to say about L1’s perennial not-so-nearly men? Well, they have a fantastic chairman don’t they! Who else would be magnanimous enough to name their ground after our legendary midfield destroyer, Ebou? More to the point, how did he even know Ebou was coming to Derby? Clever chap, I suppose, which is probably why he now owns more ambulances than the NHS. As for Wycombe the town, well some brief research shows that Wycombe is notable only for being surrounded by places that are not dumps. Also, for weighing its mayors to see whether they have been getting rich on the public pound. Oh, The Cornetto Trilogy too, for any Hot Fuzz fans out there.
Moving onto Wycombe FC, well what can I say?
No, really, what can I say?
Oh, alright then! Their Wiki bio states that Wycombe Wanderers Football Club is an English professional association football club based in the town of High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire. Founded in 1887, they entered the Southern League in 1896. Despite being around forever though, they’ve won the square root of feck all and in 137 years, have only managed to accrue around 7,000 supporters. I’m no maths whizz, but by utilising my trusty abacus, I’ve calculated that at their current rate of growth, they will hit Derby levels of support in only 508.86 years. Something to look forward to, then.
Key Threats
Well they are two-fold and to be taken seriously; firstly, there’s the threat of legal action and secondly, there’s a very real possibility that they’ll attempt to hoof half our team into the stands. Fortunately for us, we’ve already paid them out, so they’re now feasting on the bones of other clubs in financial strife. Also, their stands are tiny and their team is rubbish, so if any Wycombe player does attempt to half-volley Liam Thomson into the North Stand, he’ll probably miss it altogether.
On the pitch, after a seriously deep dive, the only threats I’ve come up with are Luke Leahy who has amassed 8 goals and 6 assists this season from @40 starts, Dale Taylor with 5 and Joseph Low with 4. I was going to visit their forum to try to discern some interesting insider titbits for you lot; team strategy, injuries, pie quality and the like, but I immediately realised I’d rather eat my own vomit, so I didn’t bother. Feel free to have a gander yourselves though.
The Team
I think we’ll likely see the same starting 11, or very close to it. Fortunately, we now have the aforementioned Ebou Adams, so when they kick us, he’ll kick them back. Several times each, probably. That said, I think if we play our own game and don’t get sucked into Wycombe’s peculiar brand of anti-football, we may well win and win well.
And sadly, that’s all folks, as the pub beckons and in truth, I’d not really counted on us getting past both Blackpool and Pompey and have nothing else prepared. A final note though, for away supporters looking for things to do before and after the game, might I recommend a trip to Henley, Marlow or Windsor instead?
COYR
BE MORE B4

I enjoyed the game.
Perfect footballing weather, two good teams giving their all with a short Leicester cameo (even though ill-timed ). Such goals and (mostly their) misses that both sets of fans can speculate about the result. 
I loved the tactical nuances, especially the second half which some didn't enjoy. Wonderstrike ruined an otherwise awesome show of how to control the game without a ball. 

I raise my hat to two things especially: 
Firstly Pompey, they are worthy champions and they played like one. See you next season!

Secondly, Collins. The footballing world is full of neymars, yet it desperately needs more collos. After such an injury to be able to play already is incredible, but to play a dropping nine with such a work rate... Incredible times 10. 
 

I enjoyed the game.
Perfect footballing weather, two good teams giving their all with a short Leicester cameo (even though ill-timed ). Such goals and (mostly their) misses that both sets of fans can speculate about the result. 
I loved the tactical nuances, especially the second half which some didn't enjoy. Wonderstrike ruined an otherwise awesome show of how to control the game without a ball. 

I raise my hat to two things especially: 
Firstly Pompey, they are worthy champions and they played like one. See you next season!

Secondly, Collins. The footballing world is full of neymars, yet it desperately needs more collos. After such an injury to be able to play already is incredible, but to play a dropping nine with such a work rate... Incredible times 10. 
 

I enjoyed the game.
Perfect footballing weather, two good teams giving their all with a short Leicester cameo (even though ill-timed ). Such goals and (mostly their) misses that both sets of fans can speculate about the result. 
I loved the tactical nuances, especially the second half which some didn't enjoy. Wonderstrike ruined an otherwise awesome show of how to control the game without a ball. 

I raise my hat to two things especially: 
Firstly Pompey, they are worthy champions and they played like one. See you next season!

Secondly, Collins. The footballing world is full of neymars, yet it desperately needs more collos. After such an injury to be able to play already is incredible, but to play a dropping nine with such a work rate... Incredible times 10. 
 

I enjoyed the game.
Perfect footballing weather, two good teams giving their all with a short Leicester cameo (even though ill-timed ). Such goals and (mostly their) misses that both sets of fans can speculate about the result. 
I loved the tactical nuances, especially the second half which some didn't enjoy. Wonderstrike ruined an otherwise awesome show of how to control the game without a ball. 

I raise my hat to two things especially: 
Firstly Pompey, they are worthy champions and they played like one. See you next season!

Secondly, Collins. The footballing world is full of neymars, yet it desperately needs more collos. After such an injury to be able to play already is incredible, but to play a dropping nine with such a work rate... Incredible times 10.