England Ram

I'm ignorant. 
But I'm thinking it's like going to speed dating 3 or 4 times and leaving empty handed.. then finally coming home with a phone number and a date to meet up...you're not in bed together but you're definitely washing your bits.....

My lad Richard likes to be known as Rich.
He always introduces himself "Hi, I'm Rich" to which my response is always "and I'm his dad, I'm poor"
True story.

I've removed a lot of posts that were completely off topic.
If there's no news to post, perhaps you can resort to puns to alleviate the boredom rather than ripping people's appearances to shreds?

Ran them at a profit - didn’t put them in administration. 

That’s it. I’ve had enough, I’ve done my best to resist but all this poop has brought me to it. 
 
It’s time for this…

Have you tried putting the food in your mouth rather than your underpants?

Can't really taste my food at the moment and I have a weirdly itchy left gonad, but otherwise fairly chipper thanks mate.

Okay then, we're just past the halfway point of the season and with a Cup weekend in store now seems like an opportune time to update you all with how we are seeing things as a collective.
 
Man of the Match Awards
Jagielka             4
Bird                   3.5
Knight                3
Forsyth              2
Shinnie              2
Lawrence           2
Thompson         2
Davies               1.5
Sibley                 1
Roos                   1
Allsop                 1
Byrne                 1
Stearman           1
 
Man of the Match Podium Finishes
Davies              12
Jagileka             9
Bird                    9
Knight                8
Shinnie              6
Forsyth              4
Ebosele             4
Allsop                4
Thompson         4
Roos                  3
Lawrence           3
Kazim                 2
Byrne                 2
Sibley                 1
Morrison             1
Buchanan           1
Plange                1
Stearman            1
 
Top 10 Individual Match Performances
 1.   Roos            9.07   (a) West Brom
 2.  Davies          8.78   (h) Stoke
 =.  Bird              8.78   (h) Stoke
 4.  Thompson   8.69   (a) Stoke
 5.  Lawrence     8.63   (h) Bournemouth
 =.  Davies          8.63   (a) Reading
 7.  Knight           8.46   (h) Bournemouth
 8.  Jagielka        8.45   (a) Fulham
 9.  Roos             8.42   (h) Stoke
10. Shinnie          8.39   (a) Sheff Utd
 =. Davies           8.39   (a) Fulham
 
Average Performance Rating for the Season
There has been a total of 6608 ratings provided awarding a total of 43292 points. The average rating thus far is therefore 6.55. The top ten performers have an average rating above that with the remaining 14 being below that average score. The list below shows the players in order of average rating with the number of ratings provided in brackets. As those with fewer ratings provided get more game time it will be interesting to see if it impacts on their current position.
 
 1.  Thompson              7.45   (149)
 2.  Davies                    7.19   (533)
 3.  Knight                    7.14   (322)
 4.  Jagielka                 7.12   (399)
 5.  Allsop                    7.02   (180)
 6.  Bird                       6.96   (507)
 =.  Williams                6.96   (56)
 8.  Stearman              6.82   (164)
 9.  Shinnie                  6.68   (445)
10.  Buchanan             6.67   (243)
11.  Ebosele                 6.49   (266)
12.  Lawrence             6.42   (425)
13.  Roos                     6.38   (353)
14.  Plange                  6.35   (89)
15.  Byrne                    6.29   (480)
16.  Forsyth                 6.20   (372)
17.  Stretton                 6.14   (175)
18.  Jozwiak                6.11   (266)
19.  Cashin                  6.08   (6)
20.  Morrison              6.07   (398)
21.  Sibley                   6.03   (252)
22.  Kazim                   5.82   (222)
23.  Baldock               5.77   (266)
24.  Watson                5.50   (40)
 

For me it is really telling that he has so much more confidence in Thompson to take hold of the ball and not lose it compared to Shinnie. I love Shiniesta, but technically he has been found wanting a few times.
You can see Bird and Thompson happy to receive the ball and play it around the opposition mids, along with Knight when he is in there.
This has helped Max move on another level with a better player around him.

Plus 1 for Curtis Davis for me. As others have said, absolute legend already and if this is his final year, what a way to show how much of a real man he is with the example he sets.
Love him to bits.
 
Max Bird is the young player of the year and would be 3rd in the main running behind Jags. One excellent footballer.

Holmes & Marriott?

Holmes & Marriott?

Just slip Bielik in between Max and Thomo and we'll be in business...

Plus 1 for Curtis Davis for me. As others have said, absolute legend already and if this is his final year, what a way to show how much of a real man he is with the example he sets.
Love him to bits.
 
Max Bird is the young player of the year and would be 3rd in the main running behind Jags. One excellent footballer.

For me it is really telling that he has so much more confidence in Thompson to take hold of the ball and not lose it compared to Shinnie. I love Shiniesta, but technically he has been found wanting a few times.
You can see Bird and Thompson happy to receive the ball and play it around the opposition mids, along with Knight when he is in there.
This has helped Max move on another level with a better player around him.

For me it is really telling that he has so much more confidence in Thompson to take hold of the ball and not lose it compared to Shinnie. I love Shiniesta, but technically he has been found wanting a few times.
You can see Bird and Thompson happy to receive the ball and play it around the opposition mids, along with Knight when he is in there.
This has helped Max move on another level with a better player around him.

For me it is really telling that he has so much more confidence in Thompson to take hold of the ball and not lose it compared to Shinnie. I love Shiniesta, but technically he has been found wanting a few times.
You can see Bird and Thompson happy to receive the ball and play it around the opposition mids, along with Knight when he is in there.
This has helped Max move on another level with a better player around him.