Duracell Posted March 30, 2016 Author Share Posted March 30, 2016 On 3/28/2015 at 15:46, JoetheRam said: "£50 million transfer war chest". Why does Sam Allardyce have a war chest and why does it have £50 million in it to buy Shola Ameobi and Danny Rose? Ah, transfer language. Another thing I hate. "Alladyce will raid Tottenham for left-back Danny Rose". Excuse me? Raid? Definition: raid. To perform a rapid, surprise attack on an enemy by troops, aircraft, or other armed forces. That's its literal meaning. It was used in the past, due to its military connotations, when managers would make a move for talent from imploding football clubs, and it kind of used to make sense. Now it's used to describe ANY transfer. How is contacting a club about the availability of a player, letting them think about it. waiting for them to get back to you, then inviting the player over to your training ground, then negotiating with the player and his agent, then agreeing a fee with his club, then having a medical at your training ground, anything like a raid? Is this how the police do drugs raids? Because on cop shows, they always seem to have more of an element of surprise about them than that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pearl Ram Posted March 30, 2016 Share Posted March 30, 2016 Ah, military connotations....I remember the days when newspapers used to use "Fires Broadside" as in "Furious Fergie Fires Broadside At Wenger". What a load of old *****, Fergie probably said something like Arsene's talking out of his arse again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leicester Ram Posted March 30, 2016 Share Posted March 30, 2016 3 hours ago, Duracell said: Had to resurrect this thread again, because I made the mistake of reading the BBC Gossip column. Forgot how much it winds me up. Why is it that whenever a big club is linked with a player from Porto, Benfica or Sporting, they ALWAYS have to mention a ridiculous release clause? Does the Daily Mail really have access to the small print on the contracts of every player in Portugal under the age of 21? And they always get linked after doing nothing as well. "Manchester United are keeping taps on Porto striker Lucas Incrediblo, 18, who has played 7 minutes for the Portugese club. United could activate his 800 gazillion euro release clause." I remember Lucas Paizon was apparently going to be sold for £80 million at one point as well. He went for around £5m. Lucas Incrediblaó* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duracell Posted March 30, 2016 Author Share Posted March 30, 2016 Just now, Leicester Ram said: Lucas Incrediblaó* I can already picture him in my head. Both ears are pierced. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leicester Ram Posted March 30, 2016 Share Posted March 30, 2016 Just now, Duracell said: I can already picture him in my head. Both ears are pierced. Stands at 5'11, wears the brightest Nike Mercurials available, has a cheeky grin and wears gloves with short sleeves on European nights. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duracell Posted March 30, 2016 Author Share Posted March 30, 2016 Just now, Leicester Ram said: Stands at 5'11, wears the brightest Nike Mercurials available, has a cheeky grin and wears gloves with short sleeves on European nights. Scores a consolation goal against Chelsea in the group stages of the Champions League for BATE Borisov in 7 years time. "Oh. So that's where he wound up." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leicester Ram Posted March 30, 2016 Share Posted March 30, 2016 13 minutes ago, Duracell said: Scores a consolation goal against Chelsea in the group stages of the Champions League for BATE Borisov in 7 years time. "Oh. So that's where he wound up." Gets a big money move to Manuel Pellegrini's Valencia and grows a beard, but gets played out of position and never really settles in. Loan moves to Sporting Gijon and Real Valladollid show enough promise for Werder Bremen to invest in him but Germany doesn't pan out and it leads to an inevitably brief spell at Olympiakos. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alph Posted March 31, 2016 Share Posted March 31, 2016 In depth analysis still angers me "Look, we've circled him and used this cone to represent his view and then we've tracked this run and..." and it turns out in hindsight with a view of the whole pitch and a rewind button you can tell us why Man City scored a goal. Thanks Kevin Kilbane. Watched Redknapp and Henry talk us through a goal the other week where Guzan missed a cross and someone had a tap in. 3 rewinds, 10 minutes, 3 lasers, 2 spotlights, 4 freeze frames, 12 camera angles later it's not Guzan's fault it's actually about 5 players fault. Lads, it was Guzan. Honest, I could have caught that with my arse cheeks and he flapped at it like it was a wasp. "It's a comedy of errors" Jamie Redknapp. No. It's just 1 mistake in a game of football played for fun and littered with mistakes. You're making it sound as fun as a party political broadcast by Gordon Brown. And why is Henry the whitest guy on Sky Sports? I feel like I'm in Oak furniture land just watching these drongos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoetheRam Posted April 9, 2016 Share Posted April 9, 2016 Mark Lawrenson Leicester City not being a nothing club anymore, thus meaning Coventry City are going to have to be rivals with Northampton Town. A great derby lost that one. The new BBC Sport pages The BBC in general 10 BBC's pundits selections of players of the season - The 4 stand outs are obvious, Mahrez, Kane, Payet, Vardy, then to bulk it out because 4 isn't enough to be controversial and create hype we've made it a top 6. Where the footballing geniuses (geniuii?) either picked players of teams they used to play for or seemingly picked them out of their arse. Tell me Pat Nevin, what has David de Gea actually done this season to justify his selection? Mark Lawrenson "I really seriously do". Deon Dublin invading my life - having decided he's not content with darkening the rennovation projects of Homes Under the Hammer with his presence, thereby ruining the coveted 10:30 Saturday slot on BBC 1, he then decides to be infront of me in the queue for flights at Amsterdam airport with his stupid Brummie accent and shiny head. The lack of pitch invasions by dogs at games these days. The decline in use of the goalkeepers' cap. Streaking doesn't seem to be the career of choice for the exhibitionist any more. Used to be more entertaining than the match most of the time. New grounds being built without floodlight pylons - how am I supposed to find my way to the game after 5 pints when I can't see the ground? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alph Posted April 9, 2016 Share Posted April 9, 2016 He's caught that too well He snatched at it Fans jeering and gesticulating how wide the goals need to be as Aguero skips three challenges and misses the target by 1mm with a shot from 25 yards Gone down easily unnecessary force orange boots The fact we still measure distances in football as yards and the only way I understand yards is by thinking about a football pitch It should be meters. Or metres. Why is there two ways of spelling the same word. There's no need. And theirs no need. And they're is no need. It's not needed. It's that bloke who wrote the dictionary showing off. Oxford or whatever his name is. Some Cambridge student I'd wager Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoetheRam Posted April 9, 2016 Share Posted April 9, 2016 I've just seen him on TV... Tim Lovejoy. This is a man who has a self diagnosed phobia of coriander. He also used to support Watford before Chelsea got hold of Roman's billions and used to present Soccer AM. A show about football in the UK, made by people from the UK but called Soccer. This legendary article reviewing his book from When Saturday Comes sums up how everyone should feel about this cretin. http://www.wsc.co.uk/the-archive/42-Media/145-no-love-no-joy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gritstone Ram Posted April 9, 2016 Share Posted April 9, 2016 12 minutes ago, Alpha said: He's caught that too well He snatched at it Fans jeering and gesticulating how wide the goals need to be as Aguero skips three challenges and misses the target by 1mm with a shot from 25 yards Gone down easily unnecessary force orange boots The fact we still measure distances in football as yards and the only way I understand yards is by thinking about a football pitch It should be meters. Or metres. Why is there two ways of spelling the same word. There's no need. And theirs no need. And they're is no need. It's not needed. It's that bloke who wrote the dictionary showing off. Oxford or whatever his name is. Some Cambridge student I'd wager Samuel Johnson I think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Animal is a Ram Posted April 11, 2016 Share Posted April 11, 2016 On 4/9/2016 at 11:00, Gritters said: Samuel Johnson I think. My most sincere contrafibularities. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SaintRam Posted April 11, 2016 Share Posted April 11, 2016 On 4/9/2016 at 11:00, JoetheRam said: I've just seen him on TV... Tim Lovejoy. This is a man who has a self diagnosed phobia of coriander. He also used to support Watford before Chelsea got hold of Roman's billions and used to present Soccer AM. A show about football in the UK, made by people from the UK but called Soccer. This legendary article reviewing his book from When Saturday Comes sums up how everyone should feel about this cretin. http://www.wsc.co.uk/the-archive/42-Media/145-no-love-no-joy Quote He names Johan Cruyff as his all-time favourite player, then admits he’s only seen that five-second World Cup clip of the Cruyff turn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leicester Ram Posted November 14, 2016 Share Posted November 14, 2016 Jesse Lingard is an absolute fraud. How on earth is he in the England squad? It's ridiculous, he's average and not even that young. He turns 24 in a few weeks, he's halfway through his career! Hardly developing a young talent by having him in the squad. The only reason he looked any good last year is because he was playing in a turgid United side who weren't creating anything, he came on and dribbled a bit. Don't blame United fans for jumping on the bandwagon, Theo Robinson would have been exciting at that point. What's even more ridiculous is that the only reason he's getting anywhere near the pitch for United this year is because Mourinho has this bizarre problem with Mkhitaryan and is freezing him out. By all rights he should be on loan to West Brom. He's the next Tom Cleverley, gets in the England squad because he's at a big club but as soon as he inevitably drops down to his level, never heard from again until Watford pick him up in a free. Reason this winds me up is because at the tender age of 19, I'm already fed up of parasitic player like him wasting a space in the England squad. He'll be on the plane to Russia in 2018 over someone who's performed well that season like Wilfried Zaha or Michail Antonio because the England set-up have "invested time in developing him" just like with ******* Wilshere. Spending 10 days with a player once every few months isn't investing time in developing him, particularly when you're just trying to figure a way to squeeze him into a system that's built around Wayne 'I haven't known what position I play since 2004' Rooney. The blokes irritating as **** anyway, the whole dabbing thing with Pogba is just ******* embarrassing, pretty sure the marketing team must have a say on him starting at this point. 'Better start Jesse so him and Paul can do their shitey ******* celebration together and we can make a nice vine out of it! It'll get on Twitter Moments!' Stick your head in an oven and try dabbing then, you ******* *****. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Van der MoodHoover Posted November 14, 2016 Share Posted November 14, 2016 2 hours ago, Leicester Ram said: Jesse Lingard is an absolute fraud. How on earth is he in the England squad? It's ridiculous, he's average and not even that young. He turns 24 in a few weeks, he's halfway through his career! Hardly developing a young talent by having him in the squad. The only reason he looked any good last year is because he was playing in a turgid United side who weren't creating anything, he came on and dribbled a bit. Don't blame United fans for jumping on the bandwagon, Theo Robinson would have been exciting at that point. What's even more ridiculous is that the only reason he's getting anywhere near the pitch for United this year is because Mourinho has this bizarre problem with Mkhitaryan and is freezing him out. By all rights he should be on loan to West Brom. He's the next Tom Cleverley, gets in the England squad because he's at a big club but as soon as he inevitably drops down to his level, never heard from again until Watford pick him up in a free. Reason this winds me up is because at the tender age of 19, I'm already fed up of parasitic player like him wasting a space in the England squad. He'll be on the plane to Russia in 2018 over someone who's performed well that season like Wilfried Zaha or Michail Antonio because the England set-up have "invested time in developing him" just like with ******* Wilshere. Spending 10 days with a player once every few months isn't investing time in developing him, particularly when you're just trying to figure a way to squeeze him into a system that's built around Wayne 'I haven't known what position I play since 2004' Rooney. The blokes irritating as **** anyway, the whole dabbing thing with Pogba is just ******* embarrassing, pretty sure the marketing team must have a say on him starting at this point. 'Better start Jesse so him and Paul can do their shitey ******* celebration together and we can make a nice vine out of it! It'll get on Twitter Moments!' Stick your head in an oven and try dabbing then, you ******* *****. Has he crapped on your pillow to engender such strong feelings Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alph Posted November 14, 2016 Share Posted November 14, 2016 "... covered 8km" ".... number of short sprints" Buy a dog and **** off Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leicester Ram Posted November 14, 2016 Share Posted November 14, 2016 11 hours ago, HantsRam said: Has he crapped on your pillow to engender such strong feelings I can't imagine not disliking him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Van der MoodHoover Posted November 14, 2016 Share Posted November 14, 2016 4 minutes ago, Leicester Ram said: I can't imagine not disliking him. Do you think he was one of those tools putting their feet up on the back of the seat in front on the plane? should be banned for life from flying for doing that, the plums. The rest of his humour I agree was somewhat unamusing, with the exception of him crapping it on the bus as the Happy Hammers gave them a good old fashioned east end welcome...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ramshankered Posted November 14, 2016 Share Posted November 14, 2016 13 hours ago, Leicester Ram said: Jesse Lingard is an absolute fraud. How on earth is he in the England squad? It's ridiculous, he's average and not even that young. He turns 24 in a few weeks, he's halfway through his career! Hardly developing a young talent by having him in the squad. The only reason he looked any good last year is because he was playing in a turgid United side who weren't creating anything, he came on and dribbled a bit. Don't blame United fans for jumping on the bandwagon, Theo Robinson would have been exciting at that point. What's even more ridiculous is that the only reason he's getting anywhere near the pitch for United this year is because Mourinho has this bizarre problem with Mkhitaryan and is freezing him out. By all rights he should be on loan to West Brom. He's the next Tom Cleverley, gets in the England squad because he's at a big club but as soon as he inevitably drops down to his level, never heard from again until Watford pick him up in a free. Reason this winds me up is because at the tender age of 19, I'm already fed up of parasitic player like him wasting a space in the England squad. He'll be on the plane to Russia in 2018 over someone who's performed well that season like Wilfried Zaha or Michail Antonio because the England set-up have "invested time in developing him" just like with ******* Wilshere. Spending 10 days with a player once every few months isn't investing time in developing him, particularly when you're just trying to figure a way to squeeze him into a system that's built around Wayne 'I haven't known what position I play since 2004' Rooney. The blokes irritating as **** anyway, the whole dabbing thing with Pogba is just ******* embarrassing, pretty sure the marketing team must have a say on him starting at this point. 'Better start Jesse so him and Paul can do their shitey ******* celebration together and we can make a nice vine out of it! It'll get on Twitter Moments!' Stick your head in an oven and try dabbing then, you ******* *****. Ultimately this is my top peeve with England. The culture of picking players from fashionable clubs is mind-boggling. I wouldn't be surprised if they were using FIFA stats to pick certain players. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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