Wolfie20

He’s having a hard time Wolfie, in and out of hospital this year, been told he’s fit for work, lives in a town in Lincolnshire where there are little opportunities for a bloke in his 50’s so just letting him know we’re thinking of him. 

Watching my cat cleaning behind her ears

Watching my cat cleaning behind her ears

Watching my cat cleaning behind her ears

When someone is decribing something or somebody and they nearly always end the sentence with "d'you know what I mean?". No - I'm thick as pig sh*** and haven't a clue

I do that - all the time - always have, i hear myself say it and hate myself for it. D'ya know what i mean? I think its because i was a teenager in the 90's and we all talked like nobs.

Saturday 10.15am and the look on the face of the father of the family who were camping in the nearby tent......
We went camping at the weekend with another family. Me & the other dad went on Friday evening to set up the tents, stay over, have a few beers etc - and the wives and kids joined us on Saturday morning for the festival. We'd exchanged pleasantries with a perfectly nice family from another tent 25 feet or so away. Mum, Dad, a few kids. We sat outside our tent & knocked back a few. They sat outside theirs and did family camping stuff - though they did seem to go to bed early.
It wasn't until I saw the look of utter relief & joy on his face when our wives & kids turned up at 10.15 on Saturday that I realised how dodgy he must have thought we looked: 2 blokes there with a tent each - at a festival for young children.
I've chuckled about his reaction ever since.

Music snobs piss me off.. Just sayin.

A lightening fast off the cuff put down. 
Smarmy bloke shouts to my friend (in front of a huge audience on a bus) 'hey Janice there's a big empty place next to me in my bed tonight' 
Janice - 'yeah I'm not surprised' 
Heroic 

Still with the airport theme. Seeing people who make a mad dash to be first off the plane, only to see them at the baggage claim still waiting for their luggage when I'm on my way to the exit.

Still with the airport theme. Seeing people who make a mad dash to be first off the plane, only to see them at the baggage claim still waiting for their luggage when I'm on my way to the exit.

But if the world does stop spinning you can guarantee some idiot will say it's all down to........KEOGH 

But if the world does stop spinning you can guarantee some idiot will say it's all down to........KEOGH 

But if the world does stop spinning you can guarantee some idiot will say it's all down to........KEOGH 

But if the world does stop spinning you can guarantee some idiot will say it's all down to........KEOGH 

So Englands' performances in tournaments is mainly down to Rooney are they?
That Messi guy must be crap - Argentina have been useless in tournaments for the last 10 years so it must be down to him!

Players who go down 'injured', frantically waving an arm in the air. A West Ham player's just done it - 15 seconds later he's up on his feet, no treatment needed.

Voice-overs on MOTD. Just watched the Boro v Oxford tie and the woman screeching at the top of her voice with fake excitement was embarrassing. I realise some of you guys will be familiar with that in another context but this does no credit to the BBC. If I'm mistaken and she was at the game then that makes it even worse.
Drop one of those wooden pundits for the afternoon and spend some of the money on sending a live reporter to all of the 5th round matches.

Caravans!!! Rats of the road they are - rats of the road!

.......and that's not having a go at Keogh???? 
I think we should get a goalkeeper in like Poom - not having a go at Carson though!

.......and that's not having a go at Keogh???? 
I think we should get a goalkeeper in like Poom - not having a go at Carson though!

Çhannel 5 coverage of the Championship and Leagues 1 & 2 is utter garbage. The presenters have absolutely no skills other than an ability to read an idiot board and as for the 'studio guests' - they sit there like zombies. For all its' faults, MotD remains streets ahead for highlights presentation, particularly now they appear to have dumped Mark 'everything I say has to be funny' Lawrenson. 

Caravans!!! Rats of the road they are - rats of the road!

Which space - the one between the ears?

Çhannel 5 coverage of the Championship and Leagues 1 & 2 is utter garbage. The presenters have absolutely no skills other than an ability to read an idiot board and as for the 'studio guests' - they sit there like zombies. For all its' faults, MotD remains streets ahead for highlights presentation, particularly now they appear to have dumped Mark 'everything I say has to be funny' Lawrenson.