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Things you were wrong about when you just *knew* you were right

Bob The Badger

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I had an argument with the missus a while back when she said that a patient 'literally laughed her head off'

I said 'you mean she metaphorically laughed her head off (I was probably having a bad day) - you didn't have to pick it up and sew it back on again did you. Do you even know what literally means?'

After calling me a pedantic dick and telling me I was wrong she disappeared.

I should have known she'd gone to check her phone because when she disappears mid-argument/disagreement/quiz show programme, she has always gone to check her phone.

She returned triumphantly moments later brandishing it under my nose.

It appears that the way in which literally has become used i.e. for emphasis has now made it in the dictionary.

So I murdered her and buried her under the patio.

Leaving aside players signed by Derby because I'm sure we have all got dozens of those, when were you wrong but would have bet your house that you were right.


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Bullpoo. It's because people make stupid mistakes with the word "literally" that some clever whizz decided to change the definition rather than admit they were wrong. 


I mean, look at the definition in the dictionary :


in a literal manner or sense; exactly.

"the driver took it literally when asked to go straight over the roundabout"


used for emphasis while not being literally true.

"I was literally blown  away by the response I got"

So the dictionary definition of literally is "not literally". 

If they're using it informally, it's not literally true that it's not literally true, so it's literally true. I think. 

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24 minutes ago, ariotofmyown said:

I've literally just has my breakfast.

Not sure what's worse, using it for something that can never be true, or using it in no way surprising.

I think not being able to spell 'had' is worse.


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