Mucker1884

Prince Charles is isolating at Balmoral with Covid-19.
Prince Andrew is isolating at Windsor with Jennifer-14.

it said something else that was naughty so I changed it?

I can't get over the term "Loved her senseless"!
I am so gonna suggest that to Muckerette... Probably even on an afternoon now we're both at home... maybe about 2:55, just before our 3pm scone!  
Thank you!  
 
 
Oh yeah... Norwegian... I get it now!  ?
 

A virile, middle-aged Italian gentleman named Salvatore was relaxing at his favorite bar in Rome when he managed to attract a spectacular young blonde woman. 
Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his apartment and, after some small talk, they   retired to his bedroom where he loved her senseless. 
After a pleasant interlude he asked with a smile, "So, you finish?" She paused for a second, frowned, and replied, "No." 
Surprised, Salvatore reached for her and the loving resumed. This time she thrashed about wildly and there were screams of passion.. 
The loving finally ends and, again, Salvatore smiles and asks, "You finish?" Again, after a short pause, she  returns his smile, cuddles closer to him and softly says, "No." 
  
Stunned, but damned if he was going to leave this woman unsatisfied. Salvatore reaches for the woman yet again. Using the last of his strength, he barely manages it, but they end together screaming, bucking, clawing and ripping the bed sheets.                                  
  
Exhausted, Salvatore falls onto his back, gasping.. Barely able to turn his head, he looks into her eyes, 
smiles proudly and asked again, "You finish?" 
Barely able to speak, the beautiful blonde whispers in his ear, 
"No, I'm Norwegian."

Agreed.
And those colours wouldn't look amiss on an away kit.  ?

The amount of jokes on here about coronavirus has reached worrying numbers.
Seems like we are in the middle of a pundemic

I did ask, but he wouldn’t let me!  

Had you down as a night worker tbf. Insomnia must be horrible. 
 
I often read this thread but have never contributed. I would feel a fraud really. 
It does however make me appreciate what I have and what little issues I have and how lucky I am. Hope people take that in the right way.  Stay strong everyone, it’s great that you can find support with each other. 

When it comes to sending kids to school, are the staff of Timpsons key workers?

Yeah I have similar memories. 
Was yours a Miss or a Mrs.....?

I reckon you should have been angry for a few minutes... then calmed down, became more understanding, and forgiven her.
She may become suspicious of you being so understanding, so soon!
Don't get me wrong... You've not done bad, but you could have done better!  ?

That wasn't the first thing I found when I googled it last night and found a link to urban dictionary.
Your version was the 2nd definition!  Wish I'd spotted yours first... I was awake all night!  ?

Translation:
For the very first time, I have just received a free donation from one of my offspring, namely my son, Josh, who has kindly donated his unwanted Nike trainers to me, as I was about to pummel the wasteful sod for disposing of perfectly good (and expensive) trainers in the bin.
Now being the proud owner of such youthful and trendy apparel, I am also about to embark on using urban-speak as an everyday language...particularly when excited.
In this instance, I offer the word Jinger".  A word that fuses the more recognised words "jeans", and "finger(s)", although it goes without saying that I wish to add nothing further to the origin of this word, this being a family forum, and all.  
 
You're welcome.

If i did that, she really would be suspicious
Other than that, great suggestion, thanks

I reckon you should have been angry for a few minutes... then calmed down, became more understanding, and forgiven her.
She may become suspicious of you being so understanding, so soon!
Don't get me wrong... You've not done bad, but you could have done better!  ?

I can't imagine anyone would be gullible enough to swallow that!

Agreed.
And those colours wouldn't look amiss on an away kit.  ?

Great call that Mucker ? Maybe in the style of Parma/Inter away shirts
Here's my mock up of the flag - with all the design & formatting skills of your average 6 year old ?

 

Agreed.
And those colours wouldn't look amiss on an away kit.  ?

Agreed.
And those colours wouldn't look amiss on an away kit.  ?

Agreed.
And those colours wouldn't look amiss on an away kit.  ?

Bit surprised we've never adopted the flag of Derbyshire en masse, rather than Union Jacks/St George crosses.
We are a bit unique as a club as we represent the county as much as the city...read a few times on here that games in the 60s would see groups of fans at the BBG shout out the town they'd come from to watch the match that day.
Just need to replace the emblem with the place folk have come from. Might get one with Leeds Rams on, dont care it's not in Derbyshire ?
 

I can't imagine anyone would be gullible enough to swallow that!