Carnero

Not sure whether this should cheer me up as such, or be in the 'proud to be British' thread, but tomorrow (May 26th) was, 78 years ago, the start of Operation Dynamo which ran over 8 days until June 4th 1940.
As you will know that was the evacuation from Dunkirk of the BEF. They expected to save 30,000 soldiers and in the end saved nearly 340,000, in great measure due to the huge efforts and bravery of the small boats and those who sailed them.  Thousands died too.
It led to Churchill's 'we shall fight them on the beaches' speech and also his comment that wars aren't won by evacuations. It might also put into some context the decision by our ex manager to feather his nest 20 miles down the road.

Stories like this, and it's true.
An acquaintance of mine was addicted to running (not uncommon, once you start). After a while he added cycling to his addiction. Eventually, he got the old 'pains in the chest' syndrome and the doctor told him he should look after his heart.
Undeterred, he continued cycling (bear in mind he's a bit of a head-banger), and was riding along a remote lane on the Leicestershire/Warwickshire border (1 car an hour sort of thing) when he had a massive heart attack.
Just at that moment, a car came along and the driver got out to see what had happened. It turned out he was a trained medical man and just happened to have a defibrillator in his car, and brought him back into the land of the living. What's the odds on that, eh?
He's since had a quadruple bypass...
 
 
...and is back cycling again. Sooner him than me.

The scary thought of @Lambchop being within 15 miles of you.

Jada always cheers me up, she can tell when I'm feeling down as I am right now.

 
 

To say i’m disappointed with this news would be putting it mildly. I know that the club aren’t to blame, but how can the EFL not include these games. The two (hopefully three ??) biggest games of the season and they won’t let overseas fans watch them. What excuse do they come up with? Home based fans will just go down to the nearest pub to watch. There is no need to “catch a last minute flight” as they will be easily available. I can understand cup games not being screened, but this is part of the EFL season, no matter that it is extended.

Like you would have before RamsTV was invented. 

Ready for tomorrow night. 
 

When it's live the screen goes black for like 20mins or however long it is and then it comes on. Not sure it's meant to happen but guess it is just linked to the internal feed or something.

If you watch live and you keep the stream on after it finishes it comes up. Not sure if it's possible on the replays though.

Minor gripe... why does "Post Match Extra" only show on Facebook rather than on Rams TV?
Particularly annoying when i'm watching the paid for Matchday Live replay service.
Not all of us use Facebook ☹️
 

#HumbleBrag

Long term couples, usually already married for at least 3 years, who use the phrase "date night" to describe themselves going to the cinema to watch a **** film, probably something like The Avengers, followed by a meal at Zizzi's (probably located right next to the cinema) that consists of ordering the second cheapest thing on the menu, one glass of wine each, no dessert and then a trip home by 10pm to sit on the sofa staring at their phones and not having sex.

More disturbingly, it’s a forceful reminder that there’s only a thin piece of nylon between Theresa’s clunge and the outside world. 

Yeah and him too...

Kick em in the plums!

Yep not had a single one popup in the last 1-2 hours.

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place.
The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them. Then he grabs some sliced limes and eats them. He then jumps onto the pool table and grabs one of the billiard balls.
To everyone's amazement, he sticks it inhis mouth, and somehow swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?"
"No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table... whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he eats everything in sight. Sorry! I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff."
The guy finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate and leaves.
Two weeks later the guy is in the bar again, and has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again.
While the man is finishing his drink, the   monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it
up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.
Then the monkey finds a peanut, and again sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.
The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did  just now?"
"No, what?" replied the man.
"Well, he stuck both a maraschino cherry and a peanut up his butt, pulled them out, and ate them!" said the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he had to **** that cue ball out, he measures everything first."

A woman is sitting at her deceased husband’s funeral.
A man leans in to her and asks, “Do you mind if I say a word?”.
“No, go right ahead”, the woman replies.
The man stands, clears his throat, says “Plethora”, and sits back down.
"Thanks”, the woman says, “that means a lot”

Realising that I've never had a DM off anyone ever. Didn't even know there was a direct mail box

I will look again, but rather than suffer in silence you need to let me know as soon as it happens, easier to detect then as they will be the latest on the list. Longer you wait, further they drop.

There's only ooooonnne Tyson Fury!! 
I actually like Fury and Joshua. Don't think I support a fighter like a football team. 
I've even changed my mind during a fight before. I wanted Lemiuex to beat BJS but BJS put on such a display that who wouldn't want to see him move onto bigger things. 
People say some weird things about boxing.
There's loads of criticism for Eddie Hearn shows. I'm guessing it comes from people who don't see other shows. 
It's like in football where everyone wants to spot the foreign wonderkid who's 16 and better than boring old Messi/Ronaldo. Or the "gengenpressing"
In boxing there's little trendy bandwagon things to say isn't there? Anthony Joshua is a target for quite a lot of it. He either has no boxing ability or he's unbeatable. 
Thrilled that Fury is back. He's a troubled guy but for him to be 29 and missing out on this heavyweight drama would be a massive loss. Not just for him but also the shadow it casts over anyone who dreams of dominating the division. He'd haunt them. The man who freed us of the boring Klitschko brothers domination. 

Cue the boxing hipsters
"AAAACTUALLY Fury's a very good defensive boxer and definitely beats Joshua"
The boxing equivalent of people who claim to support one English football  team as well as one German team. 

Ah you young whippersnappers......

They had bananas when I was a little girl. I've had to learn IT as a (gracefully) aging adult. I sometimes need a bit of help! 

Tune in again next week when @David will be teaching @angieram and @ilkleyram how to peel a banana.