KBB

Struggling again. Anxiety taking over. Self confidence at an all time low. Strange isn't it how people can tell you every day how valued you are and how good you are, but I just can't take it as praise. Have to turn it into a negative.
Feeling I have to hide it from SLT at work is horrible too.
Teaching is hard enough, without having this mental monkey on my back every minute. So very tiring.
Just when you think its gone it comes back bigger than ever.
Shakes, nerves, nausea, headaches. Just getting to the end of the day, end of the week, end of the term, end of the year.

Struggling again. Anxiety taking over. Self confidence at an all time low. Strange isn't it how people can tell you every day how valued you are and how good you are, but I just can't take it as praise. Have to turn it into a negative.
Feeling I have to hide it from SLT at work is horrible too.
Teaching is hard enough, without having this mental monkey on my back every minute. So very tiring.
Just when you think its gone it comes back bigger than ever.
Shakes, nerves, nausea, headaches. Just getting to the end of the day, end of the week, end of the term, end of the year.

Ah. Ton Ton.
Anyone who says they like management games if they have never heard of this guy I don't listen to them.

Ah. Ton Ton.
Anyone who says they like management games if they have never heard of this guy I don't listen to them.

Who do you think will be "seen at moor farm" from the Twitter brigade today then?

Fulhams boards last night had the making a bid for a man city kid from their ITK posters.

I'm waiting for some laughable African nations suggestions without any research for this thread. I feel let down that someone hasn't suggested a player without realising he plays for inter Milan or just signed for a Chinese club for £50mill.
the big lad up front for Gabon looks like he could do a job as back up for nugent....

Ali Dia, free agent, played in the Prem, his cousin is George Weah, might be worth a look

Spot on.
smac "we are desperate for a midfielder"
any club in the championship "that's 10mill please"

Spot on.
smac "we are desperate for a midfielder"
any club in the championship "that's 10mill please"

Some realistic suggestions for us to sign this January:
Iheanacho- not going to play much for City with the arrival of Gabriel Jesus. Could definitely play the super sub for role for us if when Nugent gets tired in games.
Ben Davies- Not really playing for Spurs because of the brilliant form of Danny Rose. We are arguably just as big as Spurs so we will definitely be able to attract a player of this calibure.
Cesc Fabregas- why not? We could go in for a cheeky loan bid because he is behind Matic and Kante in the Chelsea pecking order. Him and Hughes would run the show in the championship.
Robert Snodgrass- Hull are a much smaller much than Derby and are in disarray at the moment behind the scenes. We have lots of  Scottish players in the squad so it would be an easy transition for him and he would fill the left wing spot.
Benteke- clearly isn't happy at Palace and it's well documented that Big Sam wants him out. He could easily fit into the Chris Martin role.
Daniel Sturridge- Not getting much football at Liverpool at the moment and is clearly in need of first team action. I think it would be an honour for him to come here to work under the former England manager and to get a word of wisdom from Darren Bent
James Rodriguez- world class player and isn't getting much action at Real Madrid. This may seem a bit ambitious and according to my calculations this only has a 5/10 chance of happening. However, he is being linked with a move to China which is a much lower standard than the championship so why not? If I was Mel I'd break the bank to get him and it would help the Derby County merchandise and global support throughout South America which can only be a good thing. We'd make all the money back from shirt sales with a little help from Niall Horan who could persuade one direction fans to buy the shirts. The only doubt over this player is whether he fulfils the Johnny Russell role? Sure he is a good player but if he isn't motivated to run back and defend then I wouldn't sign him.

I'm pretty confident in saying none of those  players would come to us.

I'm pretty confident in saying none of those  players would come to us.

I'm pretty confident in saying none of those  players would come to us.

Rubbish.

I've been through no end of forums dedicated to mental health and the likes but nothing comes close to this, it really sets this forum apart from any other I know. So therefore, having read everyone else's stories over the last few months and after finally acknowledging I have an issue, I will now pour everything out.
I've known for years that something has been wrong with me, but the last few days have just certified it. I'm 22, recently graduated and have now moved back home as I have a graduate job close to my family home. The issue with this is I'm not exactly mad about the job, the people are not the most welcoming and all of my previous school friends and the likes now live away. I go to work and I go home, that is as exciting as it gets. 
Last year saw a range of little blips come up which I didn't think affected me too much, with my uncle's dementia and constant hospital stays probably the most notable. What's really done it for me though is the relationship with my girlfriend, who is still at university. I've been with her for three years and it's been great (she's even seen Derby play twice the lucky thing) but a mixture of the distance and the loneliness has changed things to the point where she's told me that she's not sure if we're still working like we did. I've found myself becoming needy, completely ignoring the fact that she's got her own life with new friends and a part-time job. We planned to build a life together after uni and I'm hoping that can still be done because even though we're only young, it's been an incredible time that I don't think needs to be given up. I'm trying to tell myself that it's the fact we've gone from living together to living 80 miles apart, with only a few months until we can go back to how we were. Unfortunately, my head doesn't really want to listen to what I say for too long. 
I don't know if depression or anxiety or just general loneliness is my problem, but I do know that I'm not meant to be feeling like this, especially at such a young age. I've got a doctors appointment booked for next week which I'm strangely looking forward to, purely to try and change things around. I know in comparison to others my problems might be nothing and I apologise if I seem dramatic or anything but it just seems after months and months of trying to contain everything, it's all just come to a head now. I've been able to speak to my parents and girlfriend over the last few days which has at least helped. This has been a very soppy post and as such I apologise to anyone who has managed to read it all the way through! 
 

Hopefully I'm not too much of a burden to the people following this thread, but as a fairly regular reader, barely ever poster I thought I would finally contribute
Coming out of 2016, I can safely say it was the worst year of my life so far. Yes, time is arbitary, and the 365 days of 2017 aren't guaranteed to be any better, but it does provide a spell of time to quantify my feelings. 
I've suffered family loss, the break up of a relationship with the person I loved more than anyone else, the months of getting over her only for her to get in touch and subsequently mess me around whilst seeing someone else that she's now in a relationship with. 
All of this combined with being stuck in a job I hate and am probably overqualified for lead me to the pint of self destruct. 
During all this time I had to persuade myself (and take the advice of the people that care about me) to go to the doctors and speak to someone, and admit that the depressive feelings I had had been there for 6/7 years. What I thought was just part of my personality, who I was, was actually an underlying issue that needed addressing for years. 
The prescribed medication seemed to help me quite a lot. Whether that was purely a placebo effect or not is anyone's guess, but I wholeheartedly advise anyone feeling low to find someone to console in.
I guess, other than being able to get some stuff off my chest, that is the overriding point of this post. Don't ever allow yourself to feel like you're alone. There are so many resources available to help you and so many people that will understand
 
 
 

We could, but seeing as he is starting and scoring in the premier league I think it might be a short visit.

"Hi Sam rush here, from derby county, yeah that's right the championship club, we would like to enquire about taking Shane long on loan. Hello, hello, sorry I think we have a bad connection here, it sounds like laughing from your end and then a click sound. Hello? Hello?"
"oh well, will ring Watford about ighalo instead"
Hi Sam rush here, from derby county, yeah that's right the championship club, we would like to enquire about signing ighalo from you. Hello, hello, sorry I think we have a bad connection here, it sounds like laughing from your end and then a click sound. Hello? Hello?
"will someone get a technician in here I keep getting cut off"

"Hi Sam rush here, from derby county, yeah that's right the championship club, we would like to enquire about taking Shane long on loan. Hello, hello, sorry I think we have a bad connection here, it sounds like laughing from your end and then a click sound. Hello? Hello?"
"oh well, will ring Watford about ighalo instead"
Hi Sam rush here, from derby county, yeah that's right the championship club, we would like to enquire about signing ighalo from you. Hello, hello, sorry I think we have a bad connection here, it sounds like laughing from your end and then a click sound. Hello? Hello?
"will someone get a technician in here I keep getting cut off"

"Hi Sam rush here, from derby county, yeah that's right the championship club, we would like to enquire about taking Shane long on loan. Hello, hello, sorry I think we have a bad connection here, it sounds like laughing from your end and then a click sound. Hello? Hello?"
"oh well, will ring Watford about ighalo instead"
Hi Sam rush here, from derby county, yeah that's right the championship club, we would like to enquire about signing ighalo from you. Hello, hello, sorry I think we have a bad connection here, it sounds like laughing from your end and then a click sound. Hello? Hello?
"will someone get a technician in here I keep getting cut off"

Snodgrass? Lol
 

Snodgrass? Lol
 

Plus he is the only other right back in world football besides Baird and Christie.

Will just have to wait till January just to see what happens