Parsnip

That looks like I've done it - except for the lack of blood spatters.
Are you or the sheep winning hide & seek?

Don't take offence, but are you in the taking stuff out or building new stuff phase here.......?    ?

My little girl has requested the overstairs cupboard in her bedroom is removed and replaced by a princess castle style cabin bed. All to be made by daddy, by her birthday on Friday.
Current situation...

My little girl has requested the overstairs cupboard in her bedroom is removed and replaced by a princess castle style cabin bed. All to be made by daddy, by her birthday on Friday.
Current situation...

My little girl has requested the overstairs cupboard in her bedroom is removed and replaced by a princess castle style cabin bed. All to be made by daddy, by her birthday on Friday.
Current situation...

I find these jokes more offensive and 'disappointing' than most racist jokes.

We lost our 16yo salt and pepper miniature schnauzer 'Tricky' in April this year ?
'Schnapps', our new black and silver miniature schnauzer is 9 weeks old today, we've had him a week and he's settling in nicely!  He already responds to his name, sit command and 'wee-wee'.  Oh and he has a variety of innocent/cute looks that will no doubt come in handy in the near future!

His mum was a huge black poodle and his dad a large golden retriever, eight puppies four blond and four black - just preferred the black ones. Also if I had a pound  for every time someone said “he’s a golden doodle? He’s not very golden “ I’d be worth a fortune!

Hmmm... Hate to break it to you, well, two things really.
1, either you're colour blind or your camera is faulty
2, the breeder has ripped you off. This doggy is black.
 
Good news however, he looks like a good boy and his very handsome.

My golden doodle Hector

She is 7 years old, we are told that she is ok left on her own but the longest she will be left is a few hours during the day. Our work hours work around taking the kids to school and picking them up again so there is normally someone in our house. 

Beautiful creatures.

This is where he'll be stationed throughout the winter.

I don't usually have toast, but when I do, that's exactly how much butter I put on it.

I don't know what to tell you. Mrs Parsnip's started hanging around with some lesbians (something about Jeremy Corbyn?!) and she's all over this vegan crap. We usually cook separately due to my bloodlust but i decided to eat what she ate tonight to show support. 
I'm still hungry.
 

Yeah in fairness it was a taste sensation. Homemade flatbread with hummus, red onion, pomegranate seeds and fresh coriander.
I'm a pig though so i need about 50 pieces to compensate for the lack of animal fats. I did get away with grilling a load of cheddar all over my wedges though.

Trained mine what Sundays are about 

Not a bad start to the day.

I don't know what to tell you. Mrs Parsnip's started hanging around with some lesbians (something about Jeremy Corbyn?!) and she's all over this vegan crap. We usually cook separately due to my bloodlust but i decided to eat what she ate tonight to show support. 
I'm still hungry.
 

I don't know what to tell you. Mrs Parsnip's started hanging around with some lesbians (something about Jeremy Corbyn?!) and she's all over this vegan crap. We usually cook separately due to my bloodlust but i decided to eat what she ate tonight to show support. 
I'm still hungry.
 

Got a similar situation Moz, my wife's nan is really ill and is in hospital so we are looking after her dog, which looks like we will be keeping her. 

Meet Poppy, our new foster dog.. 
 

It really bugs me that you constantly refer to her as 'the lady'. 
What's her ducking name!?