Wolfie

Unfortunately it is more tragic than that. The driver of the car that was hit was two of the children's mother, the third child a family friend. The father and husband of the victims was travelling a few vehicles behind them in another car and he had to witness the devastation. It's one thing to be informed of a fatal accident, it's another to see it. 
The punishment doesn't fit the crime in this particular case in my opinion.

I know. But you see things very differently, at various stages of your life, and hugely dependant on state of mind. If I was given those now, I'd take them no problem. Thing is though, I don't need them now. When they were prescribed to me, I was in a right state. The doctor asked me about three questions. Didn't even look up from the notes he was making, presumably about the previous patient. Anyway, I decided not to eat them. I took a different route.  Maybe they'd have helped. I'll never know. They'd almost certainly have speeded up the process of getting better. I hope I never have to make such choices again. 
Glad that they worked for you. A couple of others have told me the same. 

As a former secret smoker for many years I used to do it all the time in the car. The tip was to have the drivers window down a couple of inches and the fan on high & directed to your feet. Worked a treat and I never got caught having a smelly car.
Obviously had the compulsory breath freshening menthol sweets and alcohol handwash. Sad really.

Indeed....
 
Toiletiquette: The Unwritten Rules Of The Men’s Public Toilets
By : Alex Bentley | 17/02/15
3.5k Shares
 
Men’s toilets can be a confusing place. There are some scary smells and questionable stains. But there are some unwritten rules that sometimes get overlooked. Don’t break them.
We’ve all got several public toilet related anecdotes. You don’t want to feature in anybody else’s.
Which urinal do you use?
If the room is empty, this is an easy one. You use the one at the far end. If you are second in, you use the one on the opposite end. That’s just how it is. If both are taken, you use one in the middle, but not next to one of the lads who got there before you. If there is no urinal left that isn’t directly next to somebody, you may opt to go in a cubicle.
Obviously you leave the door wide open if you do that so that nobody else tries to go in. If you absolutely HAVE to go, and need to use a urinal right next to somebody, then the following rule becomes extra important.
Avoid eye contact, and no talking.
You look straight ahead as much as possible. If you DO look at another lad when they walk in, be careful where your eyes aim. Don’t check out their trainers, your eyes must not go low. And keep quiet. Don’t be that bell end that talks in there. Announcing your entrance with a **** joke like “Wooo! So THIS is where all the ***** hang out!” will not make you popular.
 
Do you wash your hands?
Yes, if somebody else is in there. Otherwise, only if you’ve got wee on them. Don’t pretend you wash them every time, you don’t and that’s okay.
Don’t whistle or sing.
You’re not at home. Whistling is annoying as ****. And CERTAINLY don’t if you are in the cubicle having a poo. That is just extra weird.
Don’t text at the urinal.
You don’t want to get wee on your phone. And it’s also sod’s law that you’ll drop it. Plus it’s kind of weird to text your mates while touching your knob. This rule does not apply in a cubicle though. Using your phone while having a poo is absolutely essential.
Don’t unzip until you’re stood at the urinal.
This should be obvious, but wait until you’re at the urinal to get your tool out. Any earlier is just odd. Similarly, put it away before you turn around. It is optional, but preferred if you can sort your flies and belt out before you turn around. But definitely no willy in the open area of the bogs. Absolutely never.
Use the mirror sparingly.
You’re not a girl. You don’t have time for it. A quick glance to check that your hair doesn’t look like a burst sofa is fine. But don’t spend ages in there styling it, you will look like a muppet. Don’t check out your gym progress, and definitely don’t pop spots in there either. It’s grim.
 
There are some other things to remember that don’t require any explanations…
The phone number that is given on the back of the cubicle door offering BJs, probably isn’t an attractive woman. Or a woman at all.
If you enter a cubicle and it’s unflushed and full, leave it that way and use a different cubicle.
If you MUST spit a big greeny, make sure it’s in the urinal, not on the wall. Don’t be that guy.
Always check there is toilet roll before you sit down. It’s not like you can shout your housemate from downstairs.
DON’T SPLASH YOUR OWN OR ANYONE ELSE’S TRAINERS.
Don’t try to make friends with everyone in there. In and out. Let the girls spend half their night in the toilets talking to strangers.

This has probably been here before on this thread but people driving in fog with no lights on.
It's been a proper pea-souper this morning on the A1 (around Newark) and an incredible number of cars (and one fully laden coach!) with no lights on at all.

Indeed....
 
Toiletiquette: The Unwritten Rules Of The Men’s Public Toilets
By : Alex Bentley | 17/02/15
3.5k Shares
 
Men’s toilets can be a confusing place. There are some scary smells and questionable stains. But there are some unwritten rules that sometimes get overlooked. Don’t break them.
We’ve all got several public toilet related anecdotes. You don’t want to feature in anybody else’s.
Which urinal do you use?
If the room is empty, this is an easy one. You use the one at the far end. If you are second in, you use the one on the opposite end. That’s just how it is. If both are taken, you use one in the middle, but not next to one of the lads who got there before you. If there is no urinal left that isn’t directly next to somebody, you may opt to go in a cubicle.
Obviously you leave the door wide open if you do that so that nobody else tries to go in. If you absolutely HAVE to go, and need to use a urinal right next to somebody, then the following rule becomes extra important.
Avoid eye contact, and no talking.
You look straight ahead as much as possible. If you DO look at another lad when they walk in, be careful where your eyes aim. Don’t check out their trainers, your eyes must not go low. And keep quiet. Don’t be that bell end that talks in there. Announcing your entrance with a **** joke like “Wooo! So THIS is where all the ***** hang out!” will not make you popular.
 
Do you wash your hands?
Yes, if somebody else is in there. Otherwise, only if you’ve got wee on them. Don’t pretend you wash them every time, you don’t and that’s okay.
Don’t whistle or sing.
You’re not at home. Whistling is annoying as ****. And CERTAINLY don’t if you are in the cubicle having a poo. That is just extra weird.
Don’t text at the urinal.
You don’t want to get wee on your phone. And it’s also sod’s law that you’ll drop it. Plus it’s kind of weird to text your mates while touching your knob. This rule does not apply in a cubicle though. Using your phone while having a poo is absolutely essential.
Don’t unzip until you’re stood at the urinal.
This should be obvious, but wait until you’re at the urinal to get your tool out. Any earlier is just odd. Similarly, put it away before you turn around. It is optional, but preferred if you can sort your flies and belt out before you turn around. But definitely no willy in the open area of the bogs. Absolutely never.
Use the mirror sparingly.
You’re not a girl. You don’t have time for it. A quick glance to check that your hair doesn’t look like a burst sofa is fine. But don’t spend ages in there styling it, you will look like a muppet. Don’t check out your gym progress, and definitely don’t pop spots in there either. It’s grim.
 
There are some other things to remember that don’t require any explanations…
The phone number that is given on the back of the cubicle door offering BJs, probably isn’t an attractive woman. Or a woman at all.
If you enter a cubicle and it’s unflushed and full, leave it that way and use a different cubicle.
If you MUST spit a big greeny, make sure it’s in the urinal, not on the wall. Don’t be that guy.
Always check there is toilet roll before you sit down. It’s not like you can shout your housemate from downstairs.
DON’T SPLASH YOUR OWN OR ANYONE ELSE’S TRAINERS.
Don’t try to make friends with everyone in there. In and out. Let the girls spend half their night in the toilets talking to strangers.

The medication was Escitalopram (Cipralex) and it pretty much had the panic attacks under control from the first few days. It didn't whack me out at all & I functioned normally. I still used to feel anxious but it was reduced to the extent that it didn't trigger an attack. Once the panic stopped, the baseline anxiety level also reduced, as the vicious cycle was broken. After 6 months or so, I started to reduce the dose & was probably on it for less than a year in all.
I hate taking pills to but don't struggle on your own if you don't need to. I literally got my life back. I still have occasional anxiety episodes but nothing like it was and thankfully haven't had a full panic attack for ages.
Ah yes the Wheatsheaf used to be one of my locals when I lived in Baslow. Haven't been for a while though. Had a good meal in the Devonshire in the summer with a load of family. Enjoyed it right up to the point that Mrs Wolfie stood up at the end and said we were paying for everyone. She still doesn't know why she did that ?Bless her. Lovely area & I do like to go back there when I can, as my folks live that side of Chesterfield. 
Message me if you ever need to mate. 

Well i was 32 when I started so it can certainly creep up on you. I'm normally a very optimistic sort of person as well. 

Feel for you mate. I do.
There's lots of good advice on here but the best I can give you is don't try and get through it on your own. Most of us have tried and (for most of us) it doesn't work.
I had hardly any support from people. I kept it from friends and most family, as we weren't the sort of family who shared feelings and thoughts. My (then) wife didn't seem overly bothered by it either though she could see what it was doing to me. My way out was via medication.
Once I was starting to feel better, though, I opened up to my family about it and it has had the most dramatic effect on our relationship. My family now do talk more about stuff and I found out about my mum's past anxiety and the time when my (farmer) dad was close to walking off down the field with his sheepdog & shot gun and not coming back again.
Powerful stuff. Talking.

Feel for you mate. I do.
There's lots of good advice on here but the best I can give you is don't try and get through it on your own. Most of us have tried and (for most of us) it doesn't work.
I had hardly any support from people. I kept it from friends and most family, as we weren't the sort of family who shared feelings and thoughts. My (then) wife didn't seem overly bothered by it either though she could see what it was doing to me. My way out was via medication.
Once I was starting to feel better, though, I opened up to my family about it and it has had the most dramatic effect on our relationship. My family now do talk more about stuff and I found out about my mum's past anxiety and the time when my (farmer) dad was close to walking off down the field with his sheepdog & shot gun and not coming back again.
Powerful stuff. Talking.

One of my theories is that anxiety always hits people who have a deep care for others or what others think of them.
I often see people in life going about their business, spitting on the floor, shouting and swearing at their partners, chucking litter, wearing ridiculous scruffy tracksuits with hoods up being loud. Essentially selfish to the core, arrogant and with no consideration for anybody else.
These types will not get anxiety.
They haven't the mental capacity to consider anyone's thoughts or feelings so they just do what the hell they like and dont care.
There is nobody to be scared of. Nobody to act differently with depending on the circumstances so they'll just be who they always are and not even realise it. They'll go into a job interview and not be aware that you aren't supposed to swear or chew gum.
They have no comprehension of how society expects them to behave so they can not have true anxiety. Ever.

Cheers for that Wolfie, can't have been easy. I'm in a similar place with the agoraphobia / panic thing. I used to be so confident and outgoing and this has stripped me back to a shell. Last 5 years really. Can't go on public transport, my car is like a mobile bolthole.
I've had nausea to the point where I'm dry retching most days. Its always worse in the mornings but comes on when you literally have just opened your eyes. You haven't even had the time to consider getting anxious yet the anxiety symptoms are there as soon as you wake.
The worst was when my kid started school and the pressure every day to take her and pick her up which may seem normal to most people. But then just try and have casual conversations with all these new parents when you are seconds from vomiting, so intense that you have to dig your car keys into your skin just as a distraction to make it go away just for a few minutes. Having to chat and not look weird when your heart is thumping and you feel dizzy.
People might make light of mental illnesses like anxiety etc but if its severe enough then it takes away your quality of life in an instant. Without wanting to disrespect amputees or people who have lost limbs on accidents / illnesses I would have one of my arms chopped off if I could be back to how I used to be and with a guarantee it won't come back.
Part of the problem with various mental illnesses is the fact that you feel you have to hide them or put on an act with people as though its a guilty secret and you're a freak.
Of course its not like that in reality but you always feel you are hiding something and that over time eats away at your self esteem and is mentally and physically tiring.
The away games thing for me is a bigger problem for me than most. I really want to go but i couldn't bear it if I got stuck next to some deadheads being immature. I panic and I'd either leave meaning I miss out or I'd just wade in with my fists and not care. I'm not aggressive just that anxiety makes you more sensitive to idiots than normal and often in a short amount of time a decision has to be made. Do I escape and leave the stadium and reinforce the anxiety long term for short term relief or do I bottle emotions in that these absolute knobjockeys are ruining mine and others enjoyment until I just can't have it anymore and pile in?
Sensibly I should sit through it and teach myself that I can emerge unscathed through extremely uncomfortable situations and thus hopefully reducing my anxiety over time but its easier said than done.
It's actually wondrously amazing just the array of physical symptoms anxiety can do to your body but on the flipside its pretty scary stuff. I wouldn't wish it on anybody. There is no magic bullet.

I've said previously that I had anxiety issues about 10 years ago.
It was triggered by health issues at the time - For a good few months the anxiety resulted in a weird agropobia where I felt safe at home and at work (most of the time) but terrified anywhere else. Doing the normal weekend stuff was really hard & resulted in panic attacks in the supermarket and barber shop, amongst other places. Going to football was out of the question.
After I'd had panic attacks for a while & after checking every little symptom online that I felt, it was discovered that I had rampant acid reflux which was causing inflammation, pain and spasms in my stomach and oesophagus. This of course resulted in chest pain, what felt like heart palpitations and shortness of breath.
I'm sure you've worked this out by now but for god's sake never google any health symptom. No good can come of it.
The first doctor I saw (a few times) was useless and literally just gave me a leaflet on relaxation techniques, despite me even having a panic attack sat a few feet away from him. Thankfully I then saw a locum doc who was great and after decent discussions, put me on some medication which really helped me a lot. I'm really not an habitual pill taker and weaned myself off as soon as I felt I was able to.
I don't know if you're taking any medication but all I can say is that it gave me that breathing space where the fear of having a panic attack was taken away and I broke out of the vicious cycle and self-fulfilling prophecy of anxiety. At the same time, I had an operation and my acid problem was cured.
Where do you live?. I only ask because I noticed you mention you were close to Baslow and that's where I came from originally. Send me a PM if you like.

Men in the gym changing rooms who are a bit too uninhibited.
I'm no prude but sometimes I swear it feels like I'm an extra in some soft flick.

Indeed....
 
Toiletiquette: The Unwritten Rules Of The Men’s Public Toilets
By : Alex Bentley | 17/02/15
3.5k Shares
 
Men’s toilets can be a confusing place. There are some scary smells and questionable stains. But there are some unwritten rules that sometimes get overlooked. Don’t break them.
We’ve all got several public toilet related anecdotes. You don’t want to feature in anybody else’s.
Which urinal do you use?
If the room is empty, this is an easy one. You use the one at the far end. If you are second in, you use the one on the opposite end. That’s just how it is. If both are taken, you use one in the middle, but not next to one of the lads who got there before you. If there is no urinal left that isn’t directly next to somebody, you may opt to go in a cubicle.
Obviously you leave the door wide open if you do that so that nobody else tries to go in. If you absolutely HAVE to go, and need to use a urinal right next to somebody, then the following rule becomes extra important.
Avoid eye contact, and no talking.
You look straight ahead as much as possible. If you DO look at another lad when they walk in, be careful where your eyes aim. Don’t check out their trainers, your eyes must not go low. And keep quiet. Don’t be that bell end that talks in there. Announcing your entrance with a **** joke like “Wooo! So THIS is where all the ***** hang out!” will not make you popular.
 
Do you wash your hands?
Yes, if somebody else is in there. Otherwise, only if you’ve got wee on them. Don’t pretend you wash them every time, you don’t and that’s okay.
Don’t whistle or sing.
You’re not at home. Whistling is annoying as ****. And CERTAINLY don’t if you are in the cubicle having a poo. That is just extra weird.
Don’t text at the urinal.
You don’t want to get wee on your phone. And it’s also sod’s law that you’ll drop it. Plus it’s kind of weird to text your mates while touching your knob. This rule does not apply in a cubicle though. Using your phone while having a poo is absolutely essential.
Don’t unzip until you’re stood at the urinal.
This should be obvious, but wait until you’re at the urinal to get your tool out. Any earlier is just odd. Similarly, put it away before you turn around. It is optional, but preferred if you can sort your flies and belt out before you turn around. But definitely no willy in the open area of the bogs. Absolutely never.
Use the mirror sparingly.
You’re not a girl. You don’t have time for it. A quick glance to check that your hair doesn’t look like a burst sofa is fine. But don’t spend ages in there styling it, you will look like a muppet. Don’t check out your gym progress, and definitely don’t pop spots in there either. It’s grim.
 
There are some other things to remember that don’t require any explanations…
The phone number that is given on the back of the cubicle door offering BJs, probably isn’t an attractive woman. Or a woman at all.
If you enter a cubicle and it’s unflushed and full, leave it that way and use a different cubicle.
If you MUST spit a big greeny, make sure it’s in the urinal, not on the wall. Don’t be that guy.
Always check there is toilet roll before you sit down. It’s not like you can shout your housemate from downstairs.
DON’T SPLASH YOUR OWN OR ANYONE ELSE’S TRAINERS.
Don’t try to make friends with everyone in there. In and out. Let the girls spend half their night in the toilets talking to strangers.

Indeed....
 
Toiletiquette: The Unwritten Rules Of The Men’s Public Toilets
By : Alex Bentley | 17/02/15
3.5k Shares
 
Men’s toilets can be a confusing place. There are some scary smells and questionable stains. But there are some unwritten rules that sometimes get overlooked. Don’t break them.
We’ve all got several public toilet related anecdotes. You don’t want to feature in anybody else’s.
Which urinal do you use?
If the room is empty, this is an easy one. You use the one at the far end. If you are second in, you use the one on the opposite end. That’s just how it is. If both are taken, you use one in the middle, but not next to one of the lads who got there before you. If there is no urinal left that isn’t directly next to somebody, you may opt to go in a cubicle.
Obviously you leave the door wide open if you do that so that nobody else tries to go in. If you absolutely HAVE to go, and need to use a urinal right next to somebody, then the following rule becomes extra important.
Avoid eye contact, and no talking.
You look straight ahead as much as possible. If you DO look at another lad when they walk in, be careful where your eyes aim. Don’t check out their trainers, your eyes must not go low. And keep quiet. Don’t be that bell end that talks in there. Announcing your entrance with a **** joke like “Wooo! So THIS is where all the ***** hang out!” will not make you popular.
 
Do you wash your hands?
Yes, if somebody else is in there. Otherwise, only if you’ve got wee on them. Don’t pretend you wash them every time, you don’t and that’s okay.
Don’t whistle or sing.
You’re not at home. Whistling is annoying as ****. And CERTAINLY don’t if you are in the cubicle having a poo. That is just extra weird.
Don’t text at the urinal.
You don’t want to get wee on your phone. And it’s also sod’s law that you’ll drop it. Plus it’s kind of weird to text your mates while touching your knob. This rule does not apply in a cubicle though. Using your phone while having a poo is absolutely essential.
Don’t unzip until you’re stood at the urinal.
This should be obvious, but wait until you’re at the urinal to get your tool out. Any earlier is just odd. Similarly, put it away before you turn around. It is optional, but preferred if you can sort your flies and belt out before you turn around. But definitely no willy in the open area of the bogs. Absolutely never.
Use the mirror sparingly.
You’re not a girl. You don’t have time for it. A quick glance to check that your hair doesn’t look like a burst sofa is fine. But don’t spend ages in there styling it, you will look like a muppet. Don’t check out your gym progress, and definitely don’t pop spots in there either. It’s grim.
 
There are some other things to remember that don’t require any explanations…
The phone number that is given on the back of the cubicle door offering BJs, probably isn’t an attractive woman. Or a woman at all.
If you enter a cubicle and it’s unflushed and full, leave it that way and use a different cubicle.
If you MUST spit a big greeny, make sure it’s in the urinal, not on the wall. Don’t be that guy.
Always check there is toilet roll before you sit down. It’s not like you can shout your housemate from downstairs.
DON’T SPLASH YOUR OWN OR ANYONE ELSE’S TRAINERS.
Don’t try to make friends with everyone in there. In and out. Let the girls spend half their night in the toilets talking to strangers.

Indeed....
 
Toiletiquette: The Unwritten Rules Of The Men’s Public Toilets
By : Alex Bentley | 17/02/15
3.5k Shares
 
Men’s toilets can be a confusing place. There are some scary smells and questionable stains. But there are some unwritten rules that sometimes get overlooked. Don’t break them.
We’ve all got several public toilet related anecdotes. You don’t want to feature in anybody else’s.
Which urinal do you use?
If the room is empty, this is an easy one. You use the one at the far end. If you are second in, you use the one on the opposite end. That’s just how it is. If both are taken, you use one in the middle, but not next to one of the lads who got there before you. If there is no urinal left that isn’t directly next to somebody, you may opt to go in a cubicle.
Obviously you leave the door wide open if you do that so that nobody else tries to go in. If you absolutely HAVE to go, and need to use a urinal right next to somebody, then the following rule becomes extra important.
Avoid eye contact, and no talking.
You look straight ahead as much as possible. If you DO look at another lad when they walk in, be careful where your eyes aim. Don’t check out their trainers, your eyes must not go low. And keep quiet. Don’t be that bell end that talks in there. Announcing your entrance with a **** joke like “Wooo! So THIS is where all the ***** hang out!” will not make you popular.
 
Do you wash your hands?
Yes, if somebody else is in there. Otherwise, only if you’ve got wee on them. Don’t pretend you wash them every time, you don’t and that’s okay.
Don’t whistle or sing.
You’re not at home. Whistling is annoying as ****. And CERTAINLY don’t if you are in the cubicle having a poo. That is just extra weird.
Don’t text at the urinal.
You don’t want to get wee on your phone. And it’s also sod’s law that you’ll drop it. Plus it’s kind of weird to text your mates while touching your knob. This rule does not apply in a cubicle though. Using your phone while having a poo is absolutely essential.
Don’t unzip until you’re stood at the urinal.
This should be obvious, but wait until you’re at the urinal to get your tool out. Any earlier is just odd. Similarly, put it away before you turn around. It is optional, but preferred if you can sort your flies and belt out before you turn around. But definitely no willy in the open area of the bogs. Absolutely never.
Use the mirror sparingly.
You’re not a girl. You don’t have time for it. A quick glance to check that your hair doesn’t look like a burst sofa is fine. But don’t spend ages in there styling it, you will look like a muppet. Don’t check out your gym progress, and definitely don’t pop spots in there either. It’s grim.
 
There are some other things to remember that don’t require any explanations…
The phone number that is given on the back of the cubicle door offering BJs, probably isn’t an attractive woman. Or a woman at all.
If you enter a cubicle and it’s unflushed and full, leave it that way and use a different cubicle.
If you MUST spit a big greeny, make sure it’s in the urinal, not on the wall. Don’t be that guy.
Always check there is toilet roll before you sit down. It’s not like you can shout your housemate from downstairs.
DON’T SPLASH YOUR OWN OR ANYONE ELSE’S TRAINERS.
Don’t try to make friends with everyone in there. In and out. Let the girls spend half their night in the toilets talking to strangers.

I'd rather do it myself.  I'm there at 8am Saturday mornings before the knuckle-draggers are even contemplating getting out of bed.  I get what's on the list, and only what's on the list.  I'm home by 8:45.  
If I were to leave it to the Mrs she'd swan in after lunch and the price of the shop would be double...

Men in the gym changing rooms who are a bit too uninhibited.
I'm no prude but sometimes I swear it feels like I'm an extra in some soft flick.

One I'm going to crack and end up screaming at one, "Look mate, it shouldn't be taking 5 minutes to dry your knackers. Put your ******* keks on."

Men in the gym changing rooms who are a bit too uninhibited.
I'm no prude but sometimes I swear it feels like I'm an extra in some soft flick.

I'm happily married, early 40's & certainly no Brad Pitt but do try & look after myself.
I've never cheated and never will but I have to admit it does give me a spring in my step when I get checked out at the gym or out & about.

What's wrong with dumping them at the side of the road like a normal person?

What's wrong with dumping them at the side of the road like a normal person?