peace advice nigel pearson

[eddie]

8 hours ago, needles said:

It's late, so I've only read the title, but I feel I should chip in. My contribution is this:

NIgel; don't try to annex the Sudetenland. It's only ever stoked things up in the past. And under no circumstances march on Poland. That way madness lies. That is all.

Christienacht... When Ireland smash their way to the Euros, with a young full back silencing the opposition.

[rammieib]

B4's coaching solution will be to put Mason Bennett up front.

[Rammeister]

10 hours ago, B4ev6is said:

Work with the players that still at dcfc maybe those who have not gone away on holiday. Like santoies who signed a new contract maybe callium guy and max low and up and coming players. Maybe with chris martin to help him with scoring more goals we all know he has it in him. But needs to be more consitant. If we can get him scoring 2 goals every 4 or 5 games or so it might help our promation push even get his weight down.

There are some players need to work extra hard to gain our goals.

But maybe he can help George Thorne to help him get full fitness.

Same thing for craigh forsigh help get him for pre season so maybe he will be fit for this season.

The under 21 did not win there league for no reason so maybe working closely with darren wassle. Who can suggest we can make the step up from time to time.

Pearson has just penned a reply for you B4 which he has asked me to share;

Dear B4

Thank you for the advice. If I may, I'd like to go through your points in order;

1) I HAVE been working with the players who are not currently in Ibiza with Sam Allardyce. Gotta say George Thorne wasn't so good when I was drilling him on the training ground, though working on my reasonableness since I have been away from football I did make allowances for the fact is leg is in plaster. I should add I am now reasonably unreasonable rather than unreasonably unreasonable.

2) Santoies should be kept in ladies cupboards and only bought out when Liverpool are at home.

3) I asked Chris Martin if he would come in on his hols but he gave me the bird. I told the bird he can go back to the Euros with Northern Ireland as he is not needed.

4) If Chris Martin lost weight Craig Ramage would not be able to call him the wardrobe.

5) craigh forsigh - I think you got this slightly wrong. It's craigh forsale. Probably to Fulham or the like.

6) Quite right. The under 21 did not win the league for no reason. They won it as they got the most points.

7) Darren Wassle? Is that the Darren Waffle that Sam Rush talks about.

Anyway B4 get your head out the sand and I'll see you at the Baseball Ground.

Yours,

Nige

[SaintRam]

3 minutes ago, Rammeister said:

Pearson has just penned a reply for you B4 which he has asked me to share;

Dear B4

Thank you for the advice. If I may, I'd like to go through your points in order;

1) I HAVE been working with the players who are not currently in Ibiza with Sam Allardyce. Gotta say George Thorne wasn't so good when I was drilling him on the training ground, though working on my reasonableness since I have been away from football I did make allowances for the fact is leg is in plaster. I should add I am now reasonably unreasonable rather than unreasonably unreasonable.

2) Santoies should be kept in ladies cupboards and only bought out when Liverpool are at home.

3) I asked Chris Martin if he would come in on his hols but he gave me the bird. I told the bird he can go back to the Euros with Northern Ireland as he is not needed.

4) If Chris Martin lost weight Craig Ramage would not be able to call him the wardrobe.

5) craigh forsigh - I think you got this slightly wrong. It's craigh forsale. Probably to Fulham or the like.

6) Quite right. The under 21 did not win the league for no reason. They won it as they got the most points.

7) Darren Wassle? Is that the Darren Waffle that Sam Rush talks about.

Anyway B4 get your head out the sand and I'll see you at the Baseball Ground.

Yours,

Nige

Fake.

[tomsdubs]

These threads never disappoint.

[sage]

9 hours ago, Ram@Lincoln said:

Admittedly I do not know you personally, but I think I can safely assume you do not possess any of the qualifications needed to be a first team performance analyst.

Norwich are currently advertising for a first team performance analyst, below is their technical/educational requirements:

I haven't seen any job adverts from Derby lately, but I'd expect that their job requirements would be similar to Norwich especially with all the money being spent by MM since his takeover.

I'd estimate you to be in your mid to late 20's, to have seen "thousands of games over the years" is highly unlikely. Even watching a game every other day would take over 11 years, working from a minimum of 2000 games. Going from your post history, you regularly miss Derby away games due to your or your dads work commitments, therefore a game every other day seems unrealistic even allowing for a few matches a week to be viewed on TV.

Give it a break will you and I don't mean a kit kat.

Party Pooper. B4 is our source of optimism. 

[ramsbottom]

11 hours ago, B4ev6is said:

Work with the players that still at dcfc maybe those who have not gone away on holiday. Like santoies who signed a new contract maybe callium guy and max low and up and coming players. Maybe with chris martin to help him with scoring more goals we all know he has it in him. But needs to be more consitant. If we can get him scoring 2 goals every 4 or 5 games or so it might help our promation push even get his weight down.

There are some players need to work extra hard to gain our goals.

But maybe he can help George Thorne to help him get full fitness.

Same thing for craigh forsigh help get him for pre season so maybe he will be fit for this season.

The under 21 did not win there league for no reason so maybe working closely with darren wassle. Who can suggest we can make the step up from time to time.

I hope to God Big Nige is reading this because he's well known for coming into a club, selling every member of the first team squad, closing the academy and starting from scratch.  He won't waste time trying to improve the players he already has in his squad when he can just buy in a load more players and his son.

Thank you B4, you've saved our club, just like you did when you finally ousted those good for nothing yanks!!!

[B4ev6is]

And 3 amgioes

I love this club and i am black and white through and through.

[Rammeister]

7 minutes ago, B4ev6is said:

And 3 amgioes

I love this club and i am black and white through and through.

Are the black bits in the shoulder area so you look like you are carrying a rucksack?

[Ram@Lincoln]

3 hours ago, sage said:

Party Pooper. B4 is our source of optimism. 

Yes I am a party pooper, and yes I understand all about B4's forum history and his learning difficulties. I've been around since the old NEP days with KBB, Loughborough Ram etc. Here goes...

I just don't get the toying around with B4, it's like he's become the forum's pet, when things get tough, the forum has a little play with the pet. This might sound like I'm ripping shreds into B4, but far from it, I'm trying to stand up for him. We all know he takes things literally and rarely understands the sarcastic/in jest posts aimed at him, these posts have the sole intention of getting a serious response off him for others to laugh behind his back and egg him on further. 

Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't want B4 to stop his pre match rallying cries or similar "this is our year" posts. I just wish that others wouldn't try to make him make a fool of himself, like the post a few up from this one by ramsbottom. The post by rhysbeck on page 2, giving B4 actual realistic advice is fantastic. It's great that B4 wants to help out at the club, and something that should definitely be encouraged. Just please don't lull him into believing that he would actually get a job with the first team.

I posted the specification for the Norwich City job to try to show him that he's being unrealistic. With all the money and highly qualified staff at the club, am I right to assume that they are aware of and working on the points raised by B4? That Martin needs to score more, players to be more consistent, players to be fitter etc. The combined opinions and skill sets of the non playing staff, who work with the players on a daily basis will therefore have the necessary skills needed to improve the team, if they didn't, they wouldn't be in the job or well paid for it. For these reasons, an enthusiastic forum member with no obvious transferable skills and relevant work experience working on a voluntary basis will not be the answer to Derby getting promoted to the Premier League. Harsh, but it's the reality.

Right, time to go get my tin hat and await for all the abuse this post will receive....

[Abu Derby]

I would like to see B4 have a role at the club. He would be an ideal candidate to replace that bloke who stands at the side of the pitch with a microphone before games. 

He could really get the crowd going with a pre-game battle cry and speak about the passion required to generate a very partisan, intimidating atmosphere. A mention of flanges and scraves along with ballions would get everyone up for it. 

Im going to speak to Sam to see if it can be arranged. 

[ramsbottom]

2 hours ago, Ram@Lincoln said:

Yes I am a party pooper, and yes I understand all about B4's forum history and his learning difficulties. I've been around since the old NEP days with KBB, Loughborough Ram etc. Here goes...

I just don't get the toying around with B4, it's like he's become the forum's pet, when things get tough, the forum has a little play with the pet. This might sound like I'm ripping shreds into B4, but far from it, I'm trying to stand up for him. We all know he takes things literally and rarely understands the sarcastic/in jest posts aimed at him, these posts have the sole intention of getting a serious response off him for others to laugh behind his back and egg him on further. 

Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't want B4 to stop his pre match rallying cries or similar "this is our year" posts. I just wish that others wouldn't try to make him make a fool of himself, like the post a few up from this one by ramsbottom. The post by rhysbeck on page 2, giving B4 actual realistic advice is fantastic. It's great that B4 wants to help out at the club, and something that should definitely be encouraged. Just please don't lull him into believing that he would actually get a job with the first team.

I posted the specification for the Norwich City job to try to show him that he's being unrealistic. With all the money and highly qualified staff at the club, am I right to assume that they are aware of and working on the points raised by B4? That Martin needs to score more, players to be more consistent, players to be fitter etc. The combined opinions and skill sets of the non playing staff, who work with the players on a daily basis will therefore have the necessary skills needed to improve the team, if they didn't, they wouldn't be in the job or well paid for it. For these reasons, an enthusiastic forum member with no obvious transferable skills and relevant work experience working on a voluntary basis will not be the answer to Derby getting promoted to the Premier League. Harsh, but it's the reality.

Right, time to go get my tin hat and await for all the abuse this post will receive....

I'm not extracting the urine or trying to wind him up, I'm merely hinting at the fact he's pointing out the obvious through the power of sarcasm.

We'd all love to help out at the club and think we have a kernel of wisdom to pass on to the powers that be that would transform the team or player.  But the fact is, compared to almost everyone involved with the playing staff, we know feck all.  Even if Big Nige was a little unsure on what he needs to succeed in this job he wouldn't come looking for advice on here.  That's for Uncle Mel to do...

[Sexydadbod]

3 hours ago, Ram@Lincoln said:

Yes I am a party pooper, and yes I understand all about B4's forum history and his learning difficulties. I've been around since the old NEP days with KBB, Loughborough Ram etc. Here goes...

I just don't get the toying around with B4, it's like he's become the forum's pet, when things get tough, the forum has a little play with the pet. This might sound like I'm ripping shreds into B4, but far from it, I'm trying to stand up for him. We all know he takes things literally and rarely understands the sarcastic/in jest posts aimed at him, these posts have the sole intention of getting a serious response off him for others to laugh behind his back and egg him on further. 

Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't want B4 to stop his pre match rallying cries or similar "this is our year" posts. I just wish that others wouldn't try to make him make a fool of himself, like the post a few up from this one by ramsbottom. The post by rhysbeck on page 2, giving B4 actual realistic advice is fantastic. It's great that B4 wants to help out at the club, and something that should definitely be encouraged. Just please don't lull him into believing that he would actually get a job with the first team.

I posted the specification for the Norwich City job to try to show him that he's being unrealistic. With all the money and highly qualified staff at the club, am I right to assume that they are aware of and working on the points raised by B4? That Martin needs to score more, players to be more consistent, players to be fitter etc. The combined opinions and skill sets of the non playing staff, who work with the players on a daily basis will therefore have the necessary skills needed to improve the team, if they didn't, they wouldn't be in the job or well paid for it. For these reasons, an enthusiastic forum member with no obvious transferable skills and relevant work experience working on a voluntary basis will not be the answer to Derby getting promoted to the Premier League. Harsh, but it's the reality.

Right, time to go get my tin hat and await for all the abuse this post will receive....

Good comment mate. B4s one of my favourite posters on here, mainly because he is one of the few who doesn't criticize me  but I can't help but feel some members on here take advantage of B4s good nature and good will in order by making him some sort of comedy act. Think you're right stating that he won't get a job at the first team because it's not nice encouraging him to pursue a career when it's obvious he won't get it, like none of us on this forum will. By encouraging him, he may actually send a real application to DCFC which could upset him when he doesn't get it, due to him genuinely believing he would get the job. I know a lot of members are sarcastic but B4 doesn't understand sarcasm a lot of the time. B4 is a great guy! 

[B4ev6is]

I do know he it would be highly likely but i do know if the call came i would jump at a chance.

[Rammeister]

34 minutes ago, B4ev6is said:

I do know he it would be highly likely but i do know if the call came i would jump at a chance.

You're right - it would be highly unlikely that the call would come for any of us.

However, I reckon you and everyone else here would have a fair chance of the Forest managers job at the moment as no one in football seems to want it.

[B4ev6is]

Ha ha ha ha

I get them releagted on purpose

[Ram@Lincoln]

12 minutes ago, B4ev6is said:

Ha ha ha ha

I get them releagted on purpose

You wouldn't get the chance to be manager, and if you did, you'd be fired well before any threat of relegation occurred.

In make believe land, if I was offered the managers job at Forest, I'd definitely take it and try to do well. I'd work towards being offered a long term contract on big money, then if I 'need' to mess them up, I'd do it after I've signed the big money contract so the settlement would be very lucrative. I'd also come away with a little reputation left after doing well initially which would help to get another job.

That said, I'm very happy running my car garage for the time being. For the record B4, if you do require a work placement, when my current apprentice completes his course in August, I'll be looking for a replacement and you're most welcome to come in for a interview.

[B4ev6is]

I have a job and good at it.

I mess up the cars and make to many mistakes.

[Doodle]

5 hours ago, Ram@Lincoln said:

You wouldn't get the chance to be manager, and if you did, you'd be fired well before any threat of relegation occurred.

In make believe land, if I was offered the managers job at Forest, I'd definitely take it and try to do well. I'd work towards being offered a long term contract on big money, then if I 'need' to mess them up, I'd do it after I've signed the big money contract so the settlement would be very lucrative. I'd also come away with a little reputation left after doing well initially which would help to get another job.

That said, I'm very happy running my car garage for the time being. For the record B4, if you do require a work placement, when my current apprentice completes his course in August, I'll be looking for a replacement and you're most welcome to come in for a interview.

How's life in Lincoln Mr Davies? 

[Abu Derby]

12 hours ago, B4ev6is said:

I have a job and good at it.

I mess up the cars and make to many mistakes.

You weren't driving Andre Wisdoms car on that fateful day were you? Or Igor's?