GboroRam

Alternatively you could just buy an android, which will work out of the box. 

Five surgeons are discussing what type of person makes the best patient to operate on. The first surgeon, from Belfast City Hospital, says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second, from Antrim Area Hospital, responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is colour coded." The third surgeon, from Royal Belfast Hospital , says, "No, I really think librarians are the best! Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The fourth surgeon, from Musgrave Park Hospital "You know, I like construction workers...Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over.' But the fifth surgeon, from Ulster Hospital, Dundonald , shut them all up when he observed: 'You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine... Plus, the head and the arse are interchangeable.’

You are already mixing metaphors in style, so you are well on the way 

Five surgeons are discussing what type of person makes the best patient to operate on. The first surgeon, from Belfast City Hospital, says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second, from Antrim Area Hospital, responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is colour coded." The third surgeon, from Royal Belfast Hospital , says, "No, I really think librarians are the best! Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The fourth surgeon, from Musgrave Park Hospital "You know, I like construction workers...Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over.' But the fifth surgeon, from Ulster Hospital, Dundonald , shut them all up when he observed: 'You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine... Plus, the head and the arse are interchangeable.’

Five surgeons are discussing what type of person makes the best patient to operate on. The first surgeon, from Belfast City Hospital, says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second, from Antrim Area Hospital, responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is colour coded." The third surgeon, from Royal Belfast Hospital , says, "No, I really think librarians are the best! Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The fourth surgeon, from Musgrave Park Hospital "You know, I like construction workers...Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over.' But the fifth surgeon, from Ulster Hospital, Dundonald , shut them all up when he observed: 'You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine... Plus, the head and the arse are interchangeable.’

Doggo update....he's fully mended.
First time at the beach yesterday, wonderful.

I like it recreationally. 

The laxatives that "go in the other end" only clear out the lower bowel.
The 2 x 1L drinks they give you (That @David referred to) clear out the whole bowel.
I was quite taken as to just how clean I was in there, as I watched the live showing!
 
#enjoyyourlunch

Doggo update: He's on the mend. Very relieved. Thanks for your best wishes all.
Just to got to go through 2 weeks of keeping him out of mischief now!

Been there, done that. New puppy is looking very unwell on her first day, walking in a semi daze. Late on we let her out to go to the toilet, but her back legs seem to buckle under her. 
Vet trip, £1300 later she's had fluids dripped in, and she's home. I think the person who sold her sold her at about 4 weeks and told us she was 8. I think she was still on milk from the mother, and had never been on solids. 
Good luck, don't worry about the money. You would only have spent it on something else. 

Young dog, he'll be ok.
Just wait until you bring it home, under strict instructions about what it can and can't do, and drive yourself mad trying to contain it! 
All the best, thoughts are with you.

Been there, done that. New puppy is looking very unwell on her first day, walking in a semi daze. Late on we let her out to go to the toilet, but her back legs seem to buckle under her. 
Vet trip, £1300 later she's had fluids dripped in, and she's home. I think the person who sold her sold her at about 4 weeks and told us she was 8. I think she was still on milk from the mother, and had never been on solids. 
Good luck, don't worry about the money. You would only have spent it on something else. 

On the positive side, vets can be miracle workers these days. It'll cost you, mind, but that's not really the point. 
Fingers crossed for you. 

All the time. You still on those Android and Window devices?

Don’t be fooled. @froggg just pastes images off recipe websites. He’s actually eating Spam every night. 

Strawberry and white chocolate mousse dessert. Made by my own fair hand. 

Strawberry and white chocolate mousse dessert. Made by my own fair hand. 

Strawberry and white chocolate mousse dessert. Made by my own fair hand. 

Full circle of life that, start out in a pouch and end up in a pouch of dog food

My bad, just thought with it being spring and everything 

I went to the cinema the other night and tried to pay for a pick and mix with a fifty pound note. They wouldn’t except it so I ended up paying 2x £20 + £10

https://www.fannyf.art/
Very well done

I had a moment the other week when I used the exact same term about Warnock. He's been at it too long to hate him any more, and his Cardiff team have been shafted once too often not to have sympathy, especially after the Sala thing.
Neil Warnock IS a national treasure, I hope he stays on at Cardiff and gets them back up again.

I've made the arrow a bit more bright, shame I can't control the members brightness ?

I’ll always remember my granddads last words..
”stop shaking the ladder you little... ”