Mostyn6 Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 Just read a post by Wilkoram on the How Big are Derby thread and he mentions excuses being made by people to excuse poor points return, performances, results etc. Thought I'd start a thread where we could discuss the best, or worst, or most angering excuse given for something. I once had a man refuse to join in with the sweeping up and the end of a night shift in a Warehouse I was managing, when I asked why, he said "I'm from Zimbabwe!", this infuriated me, and he tried to pull the 'race-card' when I ended his employment as a result. It was established that every other person was sweeping up around their workstation at the time, and I had several employees of varying ethnic and racial backgrounds too.... More recently, a forklift truck driver refused to offload a pallet from a shelf cos he thought a pigeon was living nearby and he donates £40 a month to RSPB! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott_dcfc Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 He sounds like quite a nice chap! When I was younger, 2 lads I knew weren't getting along. As they were about to fight, one of the lads said "I cant fight, I don't have the right trainers on" A bit bad I know, and I feel sorry for him now, but boys will be boys! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperSheep Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 When I was younger, one of my mates came into lesson, and the teacher asked why he was late, he replied "I missed the bus" It was the last lesson of the day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notts_ram Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 I once had a man refuse to join in with the sweeping up and the end of a night shift in a Warehouse I was managing, when I asked why, he said "I'm from Zimbabwe!", this infuriated me, and he tried to pull the 'race-card' when I ended his employment as a result. It was established that every other person was sweeping up around their workstation at the time, and I had several employees of varying ethnic and racial backgrounds too.... You closet racist you lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boycie Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 "I'm sorry, it's never happened before, I'm tired and have a lot on at work" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sage Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 I used to man the 'late gate' at a secondary school in Snottingham. Some of the excuses for being late were great. I used to let one kid off a week for the best excuse. Amongst my favourites for being later were It was windy, so I had to go back home and re do my hair. The dog had a wee in my shoes so I had to dry them in he microwave. My lizard went behind my wardrobe and I had to rescue it. and the classic My mum stayed in bed with her new boyfriend so I had to make everyone's breakfast. Even a mean bugger like me had to sweep that one under the carpet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperSheep Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 I used to man the 'late gate' at a secondary school in Snottingham. Some of the excuses for being late were great. I used to let one kid off a week for the best excuse. Amongst my favourites for being later were It was windy, so I had to go back home and re do my hair. The dog had a wee in my shoes so I had to dry them in he microwave. My lizard went behind my wardrobe and I had to rescue it. and the classic My mum stayed in bed with her new boyfriend so I had to make everyone's breakfast. Even a mean bugger like me had to sweep that one under the carpet.I was once late for school because my hamster got stuck inside the wall, would you let me off for that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sage Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 I was once late for school because my hamster got stuck inside the wall, would you let me off for that? Would I heck as like. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
froggg Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 More recently, a forklift truck driver refused to offload a pallet from a shelf cos he thought a pigeon was living nearby and he donates £40 a month to RSPB! Mostyn that could have been a rare breed pigeon.......the man was right.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
froggg Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 My best excuse at Noel Baker (the truth though) was my Bullfinch escaped while I was cleaning it's cage..... the class piss ed it's sen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BondJovi Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 My dog once crapped all over my physics folder. My dad had decided the old mutt could handle some out of date chicken.... My floor paid the price. They never believed me at school! I was late and folderless.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperSheep Posted August 20, 2013 Share Posted August 20, 2013 The board on not buying a center back: "the funds are there." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Srg Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 My dog once crapped all over my physics folder. My dad had decided the old mutt could handle some out of date chicken.... My floor paid the price. They never believed me at school! I was late and folderless.. You have to take a picture of it. Noob move p.s. any kids reading, don't just take a dump on your work book and film it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GeneralRam Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 My dog actually ate my PE kit once for school. The PE teacher actually laughed for about 5 minutes and let me off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boycie Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 My dog actually ate my PE kit once for school. The PE teacher actually laughed for about 5 minutes and let me off.was it Sage? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mostyn6 Posted August 21, 2013 Author Share Posted August 21, 2013 I was digging through an old shoebox full of school stuff and found a letter I'd written, well, more of a statement really, when I was on detention for skiving off school for an afternoon. I can barely remember it to be honest, but as I recall, about 10 lads were enjoying our break-time game of football too much, but 3 of us were younger and the rest were a year above, and technically on study leave for exams so weren't on a strict lesson timetable. We decided to leave Bemrose School and take the footy down to Rowditch and carry on playing. Then we returned to school and the 3 of us got a bollocking for leaving the school premises. We had to write our reasons and then a load of reasons why we shouldn't leave the school premises! My excuse was that we'd all shared a load of chocolate bars that someone had gave us and they were laxatives so we all went to my house for poos as the school toilet roll was like tracing paper! I remember the teaching just pissing himself laughing and saying "I know you was on Rowditch part cos we saw you as we were running back from the pub!, but your excuse is good, so if anyone asks, you served full detention... now piss off!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladyram Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Mine weren't excuses, they were real, genuine, bona fide, honest to God Reasons! I'm sure having a fractured eyelash and a bone in me leg featured somewhere, particulaly in maths. Fookin hated that subject. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PrivateDerby Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 My brother wrote a letter to the head pretending to be this girls mam, it said something along the lines of - "Dear Mr Roberts, I am writing to give my permission for...... to have dinner at my house with my daughter Lauren instead of in the canteen as they are best friends, yours sincerely Mrs......." They were best friends alright... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sage Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 was it Sage? I would have laughed, but not let him off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uttoxram75 Posted August 21, 2013 Share Posted August 21, 2013 Boycie once rang in sick cos' of a broken flask.......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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