r4derby

Oxford 1-1 Derby FRGS Mendez-Laing

Wigan 2-0 Derby no RGS

Be present. Loving your child in the early stages is being there for cuddles, feeds, reading stories, singing songs, interacting on play mat etc. seeing the smile of your baby is amazing, every time.

As they get older, be firm but fair. Don’t be quick to set ultimatums, but do follow through when you do. I remember my 3 year olds meltdown in Matlock about a piece of pear. Didn’t eat it, no ice cream. She cried for hours but I held firm. Next trip to Matlock she demanded pear first so she could get an ice cream (I didn’t take any!) she learnt the lesson. As I say though, try and stay away from ultimatums and extreme language. Hard when you’re tired and stressed!

Your child will become who they are over time. By being with them every step of the way, they’ll hold you close and want you there.

Congratulations mate

@GboroRam to be honest, loving and treating a little baby as your own for an amount of time is one of the biggest pleasures. That little boy will always be with me, same as the little one with us now.

@David you’re already doing enough, based on the way you’ve communicated. Taking those 2 on and treating them as a father figure is so essential. Not everyone can do that. Well done for all you and your partner have done and will continue to do. There may well be grief at the end of the placement, whenever that is and however it happens. Do I regret doing it though? Not one bit

26 minutes ago, sage said:

I'm not sure about taking on an additional child, unless they are siblings of course.

All children come to you with trauma, subconscious trauma for younger ones. It's very easy for one child to take on the trauma of another..

Not aimed at you @GboroRamI always get cross when I see a foster carer celebrated for having 400 foster children, as if that's a great thing. I understand that some temporary care is essential, but celebrating the quantity of children coming in and out of a home is perverse to me. It should be the quality of care, the scale of the impact on people's lives. 

Yeah, had that a few days ago when in a foster carer had their 50th placement. Well done them, but it’s no more important than the carer who’s had 1 placement for a longer period of time.

@David such a fascinating read. Thanks for sharing your thoughts (especially the frustrations)

My wife and I (and our 2 birth children) have fostered since the first lockdown. Some highs and some lows.

One from birth to 18 months. He was amazing, but then he was ours for a year and a half. The ending was best for him, as he’s now in his ‘forever home’. However, if I’m being honest, it was also one of the hardest situations I’ve been in. The grief is real. I grieved the son I had lost, even though he wasn’t technically mine. It’s lovely seeing pics of him now, happy and healthy.

We have another baby now. They’re doing equally well, but I can already feel myself attaching. It’s so tough, as you treat them like they’re yours. The meetings, forms and logs are all done by my wife (she’s the main carer, I’m a teacher) contact 3 times a week too! Right ball ache some weeks, especially the travel.

It’s tough, fostering. Some very stressful times. As @sage says, the adults are the trickiest part. But my heart has got a couple more names in it. I am father to 2 children, but really it’s more than that.

Derby 1-1 Lincoln FRGS Mendez-Laing

Spirited (Apple TV) a favourite of my wife’s last year, got Apple TV just to watch this Christmas film again. It’s very good. Fun take on the musical and Christmas genres, whilst also having some heart. Jokes work well. I could we it becoming one of my regular December watches around Christmas time. Shame I have to get a streaming service to watch it (and can’t just buy the physical medium)

Bisgaard/10 (fun to watch but didn’t realise it was also pretty good)

Orient 1-1 Derby FRGS Bird

Derby 2-1 Fleetwood FRGS Sibley

Derby have certainly gone on runs of good form in the late Autumn/early Winter in the past. It’s been noted by some managers successful of promotion in the past that a side need at least 2 good runs of form in a season to give themselves the best chance at going up. One is around the time we do it, the other run should be March onwards as the season starts to wrap up. That’s where our issues have been recently.

I’d like to think our good run currently can carry on into the new year, but it will be important that this team pick up form again in the Spring

Derby 1-1 Bristol Rovers FRGS Barkhuizen

Derby 1-2 Barnsley FRGS Barkhuizen

On 24/10/2023 at 11:46, Wolfie said:

It's the injection of comedy into all the Marvel stuff that put me right off it. The first Guardians film was fun (and funny) but they clearly then decided that all their films needed to be funny.  I went right off my previously favourite character: Thor when they turned him into wacky wise-cracking Thor.

Marvel films always had an element of light-hearted humour, right from Iron Man. Thor: Ragnarok bought an over-the-top, silliness that worked for that film. It mixed so well with the darker elements of the movie. The problem is that they then took the character completely into the incompetent man-child, and away from the god/leader that he is.

Marvel films need an element of humour to keep them balanced, as they are ultimately aimed at the whole family. It can be jarring when shoved down your throat though, I agree 

Very much enjoyed his character of Chandler. Friends is a show that will stay with me for life, able to put it on at any point and it never fails to put a smile on my face.

Matthew Perry also made a great 1 season show called ‘Studio 60 on the sunset strip’. Sorkin, so lots of quick dialogue, but I’ve watched it through several times and love it. Touches on themes of his character relying on drugs in life, which is obviously close to reality

He did well in the ‘quarterback’ role against Northampton. But he’s not mobile enough to be more than that. With his passing and reading of the field, he should thrive in a confident team with runners ahead of him, which is what I hope we become. Against a midfield that are physically superior, will need to show a bit more.

6 minutes ago, Srg said:

Isn't this up to Warne to set the side up to do this, though? There's been several games at home now where teams have figured out our lack of anything in the central areas and have funneled us wide where our crossing is bad or our lack of a competent striker means we do nothing with it. The Cambridge game was a blueprint for this. We were desperate for something centrally, so he brought Sibley on and put him out wide left. Baffling.

Yes, that’s his job. I hope we see that tonight, even if it’s the players taking something into their own hands.

Just now, Srg said:

That only works if there's any movement central. We have strikers who don't move or want the ball, and a huge void in anything in attacking midfield.

While I agree, we need to see the players try something different. They’re far too predictable. Even a winger driving inside and not crossing it could throw the defenders, as we’re not up against world class. NML and Barkhuizen have both got the ability to knock it past a player. Giving the defender any sort of uncertainty will give the wide players an extra second to play a better cross etc. 

Derby 0-0 Northampton no FRGS

Making the trip over the A52 for this, not been able to much recently. Wouldn’t say I’m excited, I’d almost call it a ‘trudge’ this evening. But I keep reminding myself - I felt so low a few years ago when I wasn’t sure what would happen to our club. I’ve still got that club, and I can go, so I should.

Would like to see some more play ‘between the lines’, instead of the one dimensional attack of get it wide. At least have an inside option for the winger to drive into the box.

Derby 1-0 Northampton FRGS Sibley

the Jekyll and Hyde continues 

Derby 0-0 Exeter no RGS

Just now, sage said:

Oxford in many ways was our best performance of the season. If you had been to all the other games (not a criticism) then you'd be negative too.

 

That’s interesting then, as that was dire. We just couldn’t and wouldn’t do anything in that game. Even the goal was just too late and slightly lucky.

I’m not baying for blood yet. As a few have mentioned, there have been factors that have impacted our start to the season. I’m not going to back PW though, or say it’s been ok performance wise, as it hasn’t. Oxford at home was one of the worst matches I’ve ever seen us (that was my last match, 2 months ago, and I’ve not missed it much)

I do think someone’s mindset effects what they see. If I’m negative about someone/thing, I’m going to be able to see and highlight the negatives with relative ease, while not noticing any positives. If it came out that PW had the next 3 games to impress/change things, I’d find that fair. If he goes by next weekend, there can also be no complaints.

I’m not calling Warne out, but I also don’t mind the fan next to me shouting it on Tuesday night. So maybe that shows my changing mind…

Shrewsbury 1-2 Derby FRGS Waghorn