Grumpy Git

4 minutes ago, Norman said:

It must be on this thread somewhere already, but.... 

I went to see the Joker at Showcase Deluxe, Nottingham Friday night. 

Sat down on time, played around with my seats buttons, too easily amused with a leg rest coming up and down and reclining my seat up and down. 

Brilliant fun. 

Until some Bamford sat down next to me with a big bucket of popcorn. Sounded like Gary Lineker on a Walkers advert. Eating with his mouth open, and a complete lack of self-awareness. 

The adverts played and I could still hear the Bamford chewing. I calculated at the rate he was eating the popcorn, the film would be over before he stopped eating. 

So I waited for a quiet bit at the start of the film and said 'if you're going to eat like that through this film, I'm going to lob that ducking popcorn'. Overly aggressive, but we're talking 11 quid a seat here. And I had waited ages to see the film and managed to not have heard any spoilers. 

The worst thing is, he acknowledged he was eating too loudly and agreed to eat quieter. Which he achieved. 

Who thought of popcorn? People don't eat it unless watching a film. Its ducking mad. The worst thing you could think of for not pissing other people off. 

The cinema makes about 100x more on selling your "mate" the popcorn than on the film ticket. I guess a £5 bucket of popcorn costs about 10p to make? So I wouldn't hold your breath waiting for them to stop selling it.

7 minutes ago, jono said:

Quick quid going out of business. Loath payday lenders and all bloodsuckers of their ilk.

 

Just need to ban zero-hours contracts now and the jobs a good 'un.

If you have a daughter and after several years she turns-out to be a good-un, please send me a postcard with your tips. Mine's 18 and although she started off on the wrong foot, she has got progressively worse.

I feel like I've got two wives.

2 hours ago, 1967Ram said:

Congratulations. After having four of our own ..........................

Did you buy a telly after the fourth one?

If you have a lad, tell him to grow his facial hair as soon as possible and with a bit of luck, he'll be able to pop to the corner shop for your fags before he's 16