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The Dubious Substance in the Elland Road Dressing Room


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Our victory over the EFL has, as expected, brought all of public footpath FCs supporters out on twitter. I couldn't help but notice that many Leeds fans seem to be totally fixated with this idea that one of our players defecated on the away dressing room floor. I have been looking into it but I can't seem to find anything concrete, the most reliable word on the matter came from The Athletic, who described a 'dubious brown substance', but seeing as they had just played a football match surely probability dictates it was just mud? 

I really struggle with the idea that the Derby players stood round the dressing room watching someone curl one out in the middle of the floor, but footballers never fail to surprise me. Is it actually confirmed by anyone that this happened? And if so, who do we reckon was guilty? 

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13 minutes ago, CocuBarmyArmy said:

Our victory over the EFL has, as expected, brought all of public footpath FCs supporters out on twitter. I couldn't help but notice that many Leeds fans seem to be totally fixated with this idea that one of our players defecated on the away dressing room floor. I have been looking into it but I can't seem to find anything concrete, the most reliable word on the matter came from The Athletic, who described a 'dubious brown substance', but seeing as they had just played a football match surely probability dictates it was just mud? 

I really struggle with the idea that the Derby players stood round the dressing room watching someone curl one out in the middle of the floor, but footballers never fail to surprise me. Is it actually confirmed by anyone that this happened? And if so, who do we reckon was guilty? 

If it was concrete, I would suggest more fibre in the diet.

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We are all making far too much fuss about this. Afterall, it's just a little accident and given the age of some of the younger players in our team it's quite hardly surprising. Come on, you lambs!!

 

Edited by Miggins
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1 hour ago, BaaLocks said:

Sorry, but if that happened it would have gone proper public. With all the bitterness of the match there is no way Leeds would have just sent a cleaner in with pair of Marogolds and put it down to high jinx.

It is, quite literally, utter poo of a story

I suspect that something bad had happened during the match that the Derby players just could not forgive and as a result they quite rightly made a 'dirty protest' before they departed. I've only come to this conclusion because our cat does the same when he goes to the vet for his monthly steroid injection. The difference is that our long suffering vet puts on a pair of surgical gloves and removes the offending article without a murmur of disapproval.

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