Mucker1884 Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 4 hours ago, Ken Tram said: Supporter levels are waivering. The future of our club depends on a larger fan base. So, what can we do to secure the future of the club? We need to ramp up our copulation and impregnation rates, to save our club! There are rumours that copulation rates are already at critical levels, with the low mood caused by our team's performance, killing libido! (Obviously, not you personally - but everyone else!) Even if the results on the pitch are inadequate - we must do our duty, as fans - and ensure outstanding results in the bedroom! There have also been reports of fans being married to supporters of other clubs, and with their children not even being Rams fans! We must put a stop to this, unless they can commit to ensuring that they're spouses and offspring will be kitted out in Derby kit at all times! Calling all Rammies and Eweies! Do your duty! Sorry, But I've had "The Waghorn"... An absolute snip! Can't help, I'm afraid! angieram, Comrade 86 and Ken Tram 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mucker1884 Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 4 hours ago, Ken Tram said: ...We need to ramp up our copulation and impregnation rates, to save our club... 3 hours ago, IslandExile said: Tried that. Then flew South. Erm... y'know... It's just that... Nah... I'll leave it! Ony get mesen in trouble! ? Ken Tram and IslandExile 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ramarena Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 4 hours ago, Ken Tram said: Supporter levels are waivering. The future of our club depends on a larger fan base. So, what can we do to secure the future of the club? We need to ramp up our copulation and impregnation rates, to save our club! There are rumours that copulation rates are already at critical levels, with the low mood caused by our team's performance, killing libido! (Obviously, not you personally - but everyone else!) Even if the results on the pitch are inadequate - we must do our duty, as fans - and ensure outstanding results in the bedroom! There have also been reports of fans being married to supporters of other clubs, and with their children not even being Rams fans! We must put a stop to this, unless they can commit to ensuring that they're spouses and offspring will be kitted out in Derby kit at all times! Calling all Rammies and Eweies! Do your duty! Ken Tram 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
loweman2 Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ramslad1992 Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 I have 2 girls with a boy on the way... if they choose to support Derby then do be it but I love them too much to enforce this crap on them! jimtastic56 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimbo Ram Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 Good idea for a book, something like the Rams Handmaid’s Tale or something like that... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rampant Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 I think the problem has been having it in our own hands for so long. Now that push comes to shove we fail to make progress at the business end due to a lack of creativity in and around the box. This problem is made worse by gift-wrapping openings to the opposition at our end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EraniosSocks Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 48 minutes ago, Ramslad1992 said: I have 2 girls with a boy on the way... if they choose to support Derby then do be it but I love them too much to enforce this crap on them! Said this exact things regarding my 1 year old and expected baby. The Mrs family support the vile... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hintonsboots Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 Final throw of the dice Mel. Get on the blower to Dr Steve Peters and get him to spend the week with the squad. Will be far more beneficial than a team bonding session in Matlock. “Dr Peters’ job is not to pot the balls or score the goals, but to guide people to a mental state that allows them to perform at their best”. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoyMac5 Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 39 minutes ago, Rampant said: I think the problem has been having it in our own hands for so long. Now that push comes to shove we fail to make progress at the business end due to a lack of creativity in and around the box. This problem is made worse by gift-wrapping openings to the opposition at our end. I agree totally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoyMac5 Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 21 minutes ago, hintonsboots said: Final throw of the dice Mel. Get on the blower to Dr Steve Peters and get him to spend the week with the squad. Will be far more beneficial than a team bonding session in Matlock. “Dr Peters’ job is not to pot the balls or score the goals, but to guide people to a mental state that allows them to perform at their best”. Don't we have our own sports shrink on board, the gut that looks like Sideshow Bob? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hintonsboots Posted May 2, 2021 Share Posted May 2, 2021 8 minutes ago, RoyMac5 said: Don't we have our own sports shrink on board, the gut that looks like Sideshow Bob? His fob watch isn’t working......321 you’re back on the pitch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ken Tram Posted May 2, 2021 Author Share Posted May 2, 2021 (edited) 2 hours ago, Mucker1884 said: Sorry, But I've had "The Waghorn"... An absolute snip! Can't help, I'm afraid! There may be things that you can do? Encouragement? Babysitting? Give lectures teaching your undoubted snip-requiring prowess? Edited May 2, 2021 by Ken Tram Mucker1884 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ken Tram Posted May 2, 2021 Author Share Posted May 2, 2021 6 hours ago, Abu Derby said: Give us a football team. Give birth to a football team. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ken Tram Posted May 2, 2021 Author Share Posted May 2, 2021 6 hours ago, Anag Ram said: New immigration policy. You can only move to Derby if you support the Rams. And extradite any Forest supporters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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