Stolen from Sorry I haven't got a Clue.

Such as...

 

It's a little bit dry, do you have any cream? 

The classic bake off line- "You've got a soggy bottom."

What's that awful fishy smell? 

Nearly as good as my Mother's. 

I reckon you should baste that in goose fat before putting it in.

That was the best stuffing I've ever had. 

You have to beat it until it gets stiff. 

Him: How do you like your eggs in the morning?

Her: Unfertilised.

It hasn’t risen quite as I would have liked.

One sausage or two?

Breast or thigh?

Sausage is ready

Wipe your mouth

Fire!

Sorry I was shaking so much I appear to have inadvertently sprayed all over your jugs.

I think I may have left it in too long. It’s come out burnt.

Uncle Ben's, again?

Any chance of fish fingers tonight?

Just pop it in, it will only take 2 minutes

6 minutes ago, sage said:

Just pop it in, it will only take 2 minutes

No need to brag.

Shall I put the meat in?

What a big, lovely, shiny hob you have.........

 

 

sounds the same in the bedroom if you say it quickly. 

Nice chopper