Parsnip Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 What's the poshest thing you've ever seen? Today in my local chippy (I was sat playing on my phone waiting for Mrs P's cheese fryit) a pair of posh folk entered and began ordering their food. Let's call them Hugo and Miles. Now when the chippy girl asked them whether they wanted small or large peas, they asked what the size difference was. She showed them the small and large pots and Hugo was intrigued "Ah they're served in these containers are they? What do you think Miles? Will a small one be enough?"... Miles and Hugo are so posh they've managed to reach their mid 40's without ever having seen the two different pea pot sizes that chip shops do. I challenge anyone to have experienced anything as posh as these boys... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RamNut Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 In a hotel resturant in Alnwick when i was a kid. mr and mrs snooty bstrd were on an adjacent table and i overheard the woman buttonhole the waitress. " Excuse me, i couldn't help but notice that you served my husband first. Now i realise we're in the north and the custom may be somewhat different, but in the south it is considered polite to serve the lady first". The waitress went away upset. i just wanted to heave. Actually i really wanted to be Basil Fawlty and say "oh i'm terribly sorry" and switch the plates, giving her his dinner and him hers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i-Ram Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 1 hour ago, Parsnip said: Miles and Hugo are so posh they've managed to reach their mid 40's without ever having seen the two different pea pot sizes that chip shops do. I challenge anyone to have experienced anything as posh as these boys... What are these chip shops you speak of? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McRainy Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 1 hour ago, Parsnip said: What's the poshest thing you've ever seen? The Queen. Do I win? Actually, no, even posher than that, my friend's uncle was a high court judge, who died leaving her the responsibility for dealing with his chambers in Middle Temple. We went and stayed for a few days to sort it out. This was the canteen, which apparently is venue of the first ever performance of Hamlet. I had to buy posh clothes before I even dared go in, but once we were there it was incredible, and everything was free! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gee SCREAMER !! Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 37 minutes ago, i-Ram said: What are these chip shops you speak of? no idea- is it a place where the plebs go, to find a painter to repair damaged skirting boards when the house staff are cleaning. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gee SCREAMER !! Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 Brigden's in Irongate . Saw some lad aged about 14 demand to see any shoes made with Tuscany leather and try on about 10 pairs of shoes at about £250 a pop. Order the lot on his mums tab and without a please or thank you "expected them to be at his home by that evening". Possibly the most unpleasant person I've encountered outside the 50p millionaires paradise of Rock and Polzeath in Cornwall - theirs loads like him in that part of the world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Comrade 86 Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 2 hours ago, Parsnip said: What's the poshest thing you've ever seen? Today in my local chippy (I was sat playing on my phone waiting for Mrs P's cheese fryit) a pair of posh folk entered and began ordering their food. Let's call them Hugo and Miles. Now when the chippy girl asked them whether they wanted small or large peas, they asked what the size difference was. She showed them the small and large pots and Hugo was intrigued "Ah they're served in these containers are they? What do you think Miles? Will a small one be enough?"... Miles and Hugo are so posh they've managed to reach their mid 40's without ever having seen the two different pea pot sizes that chip shops do. I challenge anyone to have experienced anything as posh as these boys... ....in that case I think you're the poshest thing I've ever come across. All your chippies have varying pot sizes for their peas? That's the very definition of posh as far as I can see! ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gee SCREAMER !! Posted October 5, 2018 Share Posted October 5, 2018 14 minutes ago, 86 points said: ....in that case I think you're the poshest thing I've ever come across. All your chippies have varying pot sizes for their peas? That's the very definition of posh as far as I can see! ? I went into a chippy in Wolverhampton once and asked for a pea mix . They had no clue what I was talking about . It appears in Derby we are chipshop pea connoisseurs . I'm sure on there forum some bloke was talking about some posh twit from Derby who came in and asked for a meal of chips with peas on a tray like it was some kind of plate . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carl Sagan Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 I've seen customers in my chippy ask them to take the skin off before they fry the cod or haddock. If they're not having fried halibut! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angry Ram Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 9 hours ago, Parsnip said: What's the poshest thing you've ever seen? Today in my local chippy (I was sat playing on my phone waiting for Mrs P's cheese fryit) a pair of posh folk entered and began ordering their food. Let's call them Hugo and Miles. Now when the chippy girl asked them whether they wanted small or large peas, they asked what the size difference was. She showed them the small and large pots and Hugo was intrigued "Ah they're served in these containers are they? What do you think Miles? Will a small one be enough?"... Miles and Hugo are so posh they've managed to reach their mid 40's without ever having seen the two different pea pot sizes that chip shops do. I challenge anyone to have experienced anything as posh as these boys... You can by peas in a chippy!! why? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sith Happens Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 Hmmm, interesting one. Where does the line between poshness and rudeness end or begin? Have seen a middle aged man who clearly thought he was posh berate a young waitress because the wine label was facing the wrong way. Also on holiday a group of diners and one man pointed at a waitress and said we want more wine, she replied certainly i'll get the menu and he said no, pour us more wine, no please etc, he didnt even look or acknowledge her as she poured his wine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parsnip Posted October 6, 2018 Author Share Posted October 6, 2018 My brothers ex wife was a nasty piece of work. Repulsive snob. At a work friends wedding she became more and more agitated as the meal went on, being so rude to the staff, face like a slapped arse. Half way through she got up, stormed over to the manager and told him that the food was below par and the waiting staff were laughably unprofessional. She was livid. The manager calmly explained to her that he himself was actually the only official member of staff at the event and that everything else had been taken care of by the bride's family. Her Aunt had cooked the food and her nieces & nephews were serving. I'll never forget her ferrety little face trying to giggle her way out of it. Nasty cow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TigerTedd Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 12 hours ago, Gee SCREAMER !! said: I went into a chippy in Wolverhampton once and asked for a pea mix . They had no clue what I was talking about . It appears in Derby we are chipshop pea connoisseurs . I'm sure on there forum some bloke was talking about some posh twit from Derby who came in and asked for a meal of chips with peas on a tray like it was some kind of plate . The term ‘mix’ is a derby thing. Even in Leicester when I ask for a curry mix they have no idea what I’m talking about. I have to describe it as a tray of chips with curry sauce poured over it. So they say, so it’s a tray of chips with a tub of curry. I say, no, it’s a tray of chips with curry poured over it. Then I realised I’m just asking her to pour my curry for me. So if you think about it, a ‘mix’ is actually quite posh. We’re all too posh to pour our own curry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TigerTedd Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 But the poshest thing I ever saw was this: i was once invited to a wedding by a work colleague. She was a nurse. I left, but I still had the invitation. I was staying with a mate, and we were wondering what to do that evening, we only had a fiver each, and I remembered I still had this invitation. I got my dad to give us a lift to the address. We couldn’t find it, so I got out to ask two security guards apparently guarding some sort of castle. turned out that was her parents’ house, where the reception was. A massive marquee was in the front garden, they’d essentially tarmac we the back garden to create a car park, and the stables had been turned into a free bar. I felt like I had just seriously reduced the tone. People were walking around with little bottles of champagne. I asked for one of those, but they’d ran out, so they gave me a proper bottle, which I just swigged. Eventually, when it was time to go, I couldn’t be arsed to wait for a taxi. I thought I’d sneak into the house (which was out of bounds) and find somewhere to sleep there. I found the laundry room, and went to sleep on an ironing board. Till my mate dragged me out and chucked me in a taxi. That was considerably posher than I expected it to be, and showed me I was way out of my league at that level of poshness. A curry mix is more my league. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grimbeard Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 Well I live in Ilson, so obviously I never see owt that could be called 'posh'. But I think you'll wait a long time before Peter Mandelson's chippy faux pa is beaten. On a visit to see the Monkey Hangers of Hartlepool, he was taken into a chippy, and, after perusing the tasty comestibles on offer, he pointed to the mushy peas and ventured that he'd perhaps try a little of that guacamole. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coneheadjohn Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 I’ll give you the least posh thing I see regularly at our chippy. Scraps and peas,gravy or curry. People don’t even have chips!!Just scraps. The poshest thing was a woman asking what kind of oil they used?? The answer....’Cooking’. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RamNut Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 The only place i've been offered scraps is the chippy behind the Leppings Lane end in sheffield. I felt a nice warm glow of affection for the people of sheffield. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angry Ram Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 I’m quite posh. Honest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sith Happens Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 I had something posh once. But not allowed to discuss the subject so can't say what. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jono Posted October 6, 2018 Share Posted October 6, 2018 My gran had a sugar bowl, always had lump sugar in it and silver tongs .. does that count ? She also made rice pudding but my granddad always spoilt the image by tucking his napkin in his collar before eating it ( although some might say tucking your napkin in that way is really aristocratic because it’s functional and does the job rather than being effete and generally a bit petit bourgeoisie ?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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