Random stuff that people do that annoy me

[sage]

7 minutes ago, ladyram said:

Oh now you see, this drives me potty from the other perspective! 

Cleaners are there to clean the facilities, like wipe down yer microwave and empty yer kitchen bin, not to clean up after the workers!! You are all quite capable of rinsing out a cup, it isn't rocket science my good man.

So wash your own sodding pots ya idle gits!! 

Rant over 

Leave it for the cleaner. You don't keep a dog and bark yourself.

[Wolfie]

Appallingly cringeworthy & meaningless job titles/roles.

Ones I've seen recently on LinkedIn:

• Opinion Leader.
• Thought Leader.
• Brand Defender
• Accounting Ninja
• Frangipan Tuddlemerkin
• Influencer.
• Changemaker.

*I made one of those up. Only one, mind.

[LesterRam]

Blue sky thinking replacing brain storming due to the negative connotations (epilepsy) one for the PC brigade, what a load of ****.

[Phoenix]

From today's Grauniad.

Principal Developer Obligations Officer

Contribute to the development of policy and methodologies for Developer Obligations and manage the Developer Obligations team and the effective and efficient delivery of the Developer Obligations service, by securing and implementing developer contributions to offset the impact of development on infrastructure and services

There is a responsibility for the post holder to demonstrate a commitment to quality service delivery through continuous improvement for the benefit of the Service and the organisation

This position is designated as a 'Flexible' post as detailed on the Worksmart website via the button below.

Informal enquiries to Pat Jericevich Tel 01224 664553

Responsibilities

Manage the Developer Obligations team, ensuring client needs are anticipated, identified, and met in all aspects of developer obligations affecting the Council and that maximum benefit is accrued in accordance with the policy requirements to the Council, from developers seeking planning consent in the Aberdeenshire area and other Council areas where Service Level Agreements apply

Contribute to working parties considering the operational implications of Developer Obligations initiatives, developments or changes in legislation and represent the Council in all forms of agreements with developers, partners and stakeholders

Ensure developer obligations are optimised on behalf the Council and that legal and financial risks to the Council are considered and managed

Lead on and manage the collection arrangements of monies arising from developer obligations and monitor associated financial income

Contribute to the on-going development of Developer Obligations strategy and policy, and contribute to the implementation and monitoring of legislation and regulation

Contribute to the assessment of service user needs and development, design and improvement of the Developer Obligations section and to the Business service of Legal & Governance

Line Manage the Senior Officer, Officers, Co-ordinator, Support Officer and any trainee or additional support staff within the Developer Obligations Team

Liaise with in-house solicitors regarding the terms of agreements

Lead on the provision of training on Developer Obligations

Contribute to the long term planning of the section’s physical and information resources, and pursue and implement innovative ICT approaches within the service

Sounds good. What does it mean?

[Pearl Ram]

Power cuts, we get 3 or 4 a year and we've just had a two hour one while my chops were in the oven. 

[Alph]

When she doesn't stack pots in the sink correctly. A plate on a bowl on a cup?

When they finish with a toilet roll and leave the cardboard in the bog

When she doesn't arrange food neatly on the plates. Including her plate

Being asked where I'm going when I'm heading upstairs

My daughter saying "pardon" when she's heard you.

Having a rubbish bag 5 yards from the black bin. Unless it's raining grenades then just walk outside?

When she puts things ON the bag instead of IN the bag

When one of them, not sure which, puts a plate with any food on it in the sink.

When any of them, including the tiny one, leave cereal in a bowl.

The smell of toast

When she does jam on toast but rations the jam. 

Teaoffee or Coftea. Use a different spoon!!!! 

When the bigger one leaves baby wipes around for the tiny one to empty the packet and then the fooking furry one eats them!!! 

Strapping them in the car when they sit on the groin bit and stare at you as you try to fish it out. 

When the tiny one sucks toothpaste off the brush. 

When she does their hair. The noise is a bloody joke. 

[Mostyn6]

one that has totally bugged me for years; People who watch some of a movie, with the intention of watching the rest the next day!

Over the years, I've borrowed my favourite DVDs to colleagues and friends, and when asking if they enjoyed it, occasionally get the response "I'm half way through, I'll watch the rest tonight!".

WTF!! How hard can it be to watch a 90 minute film?

[ladyram]

4 hours ago, Alpha said:

When she doesn't stack pots in the sink correctly. A plate on a bowl on a cup?

When they finish with a toilet roll and leave the cardboard in the bog

When she doesn't arrange food neatly on the plates. Including her plate

Being asked where I'm going when I'm heading upstairs

My daughter saying "pardon" when she's heard you.

Having a rubbish bag 5 yards from the black bin. Unless it's raining grenades then just walk outside?

When she puts things ON the bag instead of IN the bag

When one of them, not sure which, puts a plate with any food on it in the sink.

When any of them, including the tiny one, leave cereal in a bowl.

The smell of toast

When she does jam on toast but rations the jam. 

Teaoffee or Coftea. Use a different spoon!!!! 

When the bigger one leaves baby wipes around for the tiny one to empty the packet and then the fooking furry one eats them!!! 

Strapping them in the car when they sit on the groin bit and stare at you as you try to fish it out. 

When the tiny one sucks toothpaste off the brush. 

When she does their hair. The noise is a bloody joke. 

Lolol, tell ya what, it sounds like you need to do more! 

I recommend you start with a simple teaspoon.

[Phoenix]

People who drop cotton buds down the toilet. Usually my step-children. (Adults, by the way.)

[Mostyn6]

6 minutes ago, Phoenix said:

People who drop cotton buds down the toilet. Usually my step-children. (Adults, by the way.)

I do that, but usually when sitting on the toilet, so they get buried amongst other 'waste' and get dragged down the flusher by the undercurrent 

[Phoenix]

5 minutes ago, Mostyn6 said:

I do that, but usually when sitting on the toilet, so they get buried amongst other 'waste' and get dragged down the flusher by the undercurrent 

I'll tell them

[SaintRam]

4 minutes ago, Phoenix said:

I'll tell them

Can just wrap them in a single square of toilet paper and they go down fine. 

[Mostyn6]

2 minutes ago, SaintRam said:

Can just wrap them in a single square of toilet paper and they go down fine. 

it's better to sink them with missiles

[Wolfie]

Cotton buds?. WTF is wrong with bog roll?

[Alph]

8 hours ago, ladyram said:

Lolol, tell ya what, it sounds like you need to do more! 

I recommend you start with a simple teaspoon.

Stupid idea

[Alph]

How come @JoetheRam hasn't filled this thread. 

When I saw the title I raced here to read his rant and he's only had a little whinge. 

Biggest flop since Torres to Chelsea

[JoetheRam]

Back once again... (for the renegade master, D4 damager).

- Unnecessary packaging. Why does my sandwich come in a cellophane wrapper, to then have a cardboard tray underneath the roll? What is the cardboard supporting exactly. I blame the EU. Probably.

- May have already been mentioned, but noisy eaters. There's two of the b*stards in my office. Crisps I accept can be loud, especially the crinkle cut ones but how do they make so much noise when they're eating a banana? Must be poor parenting, which will no doubt be passed down through the generations without correct treatment. Sterilise them.

- People who go abroad and don't make any effort whatsoever to speak the language. Even if it's a simple "hello", "goodbye", "please", "thanks", "can we have a table for 4?". I hate to say it but I think the English are the worst for this.

- On public transport when you already have control of  the armrest, because you arrived at the correct time, and the overweight, slightly smelly w*nker eating prawn cocktail crisps tries to muscle in on your turf. You try to assert your dominance with a combination of dirty sideways glances and light tutting but it's too late, he doesn't mind arm to arm contact, or if he does he can't feel it through the layers of blubber he's acquired over the last 40 years. A blight on modern Britain.

- Also on public transport when people sit in the aisle seat, with a vacant window seat. Or even worse when they sit by the window and place their bag in the aisle seat and look at you as though you've asked them to give up their unborn child when you enquire as to whether you may move the offending item. I propose private train services for nice people only to combat this.

- The price of razor blades.

- Poor lift ettiquette. You've chosen the responsibility of Button Control Officer, please be courteous enough to ask me which floor I require, instead of making me lunge awkwardly over your shoulder. Anyone of sound body not travelling more than the required 6 floors in an upward direction should exit immediately.

- Mothers with prams, old biddies, gangs of pre-teens, infact any female of our species in a city centre environment. Unfortunately sometimes men have to go shopping as well, and we must forever put up with the slow walking pace, the stopping to check the baby is still in it's pram, the stopping to look in shop windows, the stopping in shop doorways to bitch to your best girlfriend who you've just seen, the zig-zagging and changing of lanes to cut infront of you at the entrance to Birds... this is why the high street is f**ked.

[JoetheRam]

14 minutes ago, Alpha said:

How come @JoetheRam hasn't filled this thread. 

When I saw the title I raced here to read his rant and he's only had a little whinge. 

Biggest flop since Torres to Chelsea

Hey @Alpha. Was busy bottling some up.

[Posh Ram]

Chris Evans.

[Phoenix]

Puns