mozza Posted September 7, 2018 Share Posted September 7, 2018 7 minutes ago, GboroRam said: I heard it as the assbone of a giraffe. Surprised we were allowed to hear it at all, in here nowadays.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sage Posted September 7, 2018 Share Posted September 7, 2018 27 minutes ago, GboroRam said: I heard it as the assbone of a giraffe. Another tall story Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
May Contain Nuts Posted September 7, 2018 Share Posted September 7, 2018 What do the Sixth Sense and Titanic have in common? I see dead people... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jono Posted September 7, 2018 Share Posted September 7, 2018 From the school kids joke compendium circa 1960 something What’s the definition of hope .. an elephant hanging over a cliff with its tail tied to a daisey What's the definition of Cheek .. weeing through a letterbox and then ringing the doorbell to ask how far it went whats the definition of agony .. sliding down a razor blade using your balls as brakes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2tups Posted September 7, 2018 Share Posted September 7, 2018 1 hour ago, jono said: From the school kids joke compendium circa 1960 something What’s the definition of hope .. an elephant hanging over a cliff with its tail tied to a daisey What's the definition of Cheek .. weeing through a letterbox and then ringing the doorbell to ask how far it went whats the definition of agony .. sliding down a razor blade using your balls as brakes From the same tome : Why do elephants paint their testicles red ? So they can hide in the high, high cherry trees. What's the loudest noise in the jungle ? Giraffes eating cherries. jono 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmericanRam Posted September 8, 2018 Share Posted September 8, 2018 A Mummy covered in hazelnuts and chocolate has just been discovered in Egypt. Archaeologists believe it might be Pharaoh Rocher. ThePrisoner 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bwash_Ram Posted September 12, 2018 Share Posted September 12, 2018 Marriage is like a game of cards. In the beginning all you need is 2 Hearts and 1 Diamond Pretty soon you wish you had a Club and a Spade jono, cstand, Wolfie and 1 other 1 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThePrisoner Posted September 12, 2018 Share Posted September 12, 2018 On 08/09/2018 at 13:37, AmericanRam said: A Mummy covered in hazelnuts and chocolate has just been discovered in Egypt. Archaeologists believe it might be Pharaoh Rocher. Close the thread, this is the peak. AmericanRam 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmericanRam Posted September 17, 2018 Share Posted September 17, 2018 Bought a dog from the blacksmith yesterday. Soon as I got it home it made a bolt for the door! Alph, richinspain, ThePrisoner and 4 others 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GboroRam Posted September 17, 2018 Share Posted September 17, 2018 froggg, Stive Pesley and Steve How Hard? 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stive Pesley Posted September 26, 2018 Share Posted September 26, 2018 I've just been kicked out of London Zoo for making a parrot giggle It's polly tickle correctness gone mad I tell ya cstand, Steve How Hard? and McRainy 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stive Pesley Posted September 27, 2018 Share Posted September 27, 2018 Why can't owls tell bad jokes? Because they are knock-knockturnal McRainy and GboroRam 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GboroRam Posted September 27, 2018 Share Posted September 27, 2018 22 minutes ago, StivePesley said: Why can't owls tell bad jokes? Because they are knock-knockturnal Time to get your coat. Stive Pesley 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stive Pesley Posted October 8, 2018 Share Posted October 8, 2018 My dad always used to reckon that when he was fishing, he'd put the maggots under his tongue to warm them up and make them wriggle more on the hook. That's disgusting if true. Does anyone know if this is a real thing? I await the answer with baited breath ThePrisoner, rynny and McRainy 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McRamFan Posted October 8, 2018 Share Posted October 8, 2018 6 minutes ago, StivePesley said: My dad always used to reckon that when he was fishing, he'd put the maggots under his tongue to warm them up and make them wriggle more on the hook. That's disgusting if true. Does anyone know if this is a real thing? I await the answer with baited breath Why is this in the joke thread, cos it ain't hooked me... Yes its true, also on wounds they would use maggots to eat away the rotten flesh, they only eat dead material, so actually clean crap up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
richinspain Posted October 8, 2018 Share Posted October 8, 2018 (edited) 13 minutes ago, StivePesley said: My dad always used to reckon that when he was fishing, he'd put the maggots under his tongue to warm them up and make them wriggle more on the hook. That's disgusting if true. Does anyone know if this is a real thing? I await the answer with baited breath Perfectly true. Never done it myself but heard of it lots of times. Doesn't @David fish? Do you put your maggot under your tongue David? Edited October 8, 2018 by richinspain Added question mark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GboroRam Posted October 8, 2018 Share Posted October 8, 2018 2 hours ago, richinspain said: Perfectly true. Never done it myself but heard of it lots of times. Doesn't @David fish? Do you put your maggot under your tongue David? Maybe ask his missus? Day and richinspain 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stive Pesley Posted October 9, 2018 Share Posted October 9, 2018 14 hours ago, richinspain said: Do you put your maggot under your tongue David? He's tried many times - we just have one verterbrae too many mozza 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spanish Posted October 9, 2018 Share Posted October 9, 2018 Just now, StivePesley said: He's tried many times - we just have one verterbrae too many I suppose it depends on the size of maggot? Stive Pesley 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McRainy Posted October 9, 2018 Share Posted October 9, 2018 I wonder what the meditations are like... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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