Bwash_Ram Posted July 9, 2019 Share Posted July 9, 2019 Mick Brolly, Steve How Hard?, i-Ram and 6 others 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bwash_Ram Posted July 18, 2019 Share Posted July 18, 2019 I know nothing 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i-Ram Posted July 19, 2019 Share Posted July 19, 2019 Met this girl in the pub, and said to her ‘you remind me of my little toe’. She said ‘ahhh, do you mean I am small and squidgy’. l said ‘Nah, in half an hour I hope to be banging you hard against the kitchen table’. Parsnip, Steve How Hard? and Mick Brolly 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turk Thrust Posted July 19, 2019 Share Posted July 19, 2019 She said You show me your collection of old rags and I'll show you my bosom. It was tit for tat Mick Brolly and I know nothing 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turk Thrust Posted July 19, 2019 Share Posted July 19, 2019 (edited) Z Edited July 19, 2019 by Turk Thrust Duplicated ramit 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bwash_Ram Posted July 25, 2019 Share Posted July 25, 2019 A mate of mine believes that the Earth is flat. I challenged him to prove it by walking off the edge... He eventually came around. Mick Brolly 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Kevin Posted July 27, 2019 Share Posted July 27, 2019 There's a plane crash and a man gets washed up ashore on a remote island in the pacific the only other person that makes it is no other that Kylie Minogue .Well this guy can't believe his luck ,they learn to survive and get on together and in due course become an item . After a while they are sitting there discussing their predicament" are you happy " ? she asks . "What man wouldn't be happy stranded on a desert island with you but I miss my mates and lads banter" he replies. Kylie trying to be helpful says "look this island is only 6 miles round I'll dress up in your clothes and start walking one way round ,you go the other way and when we meet you can pretend I'm a mate and tell me what you want". So they set off in opposite directions ,after a couple of hours he see's her in the distance ,as they get closer he starts to walk faster and then breaks into a run . He runs up to her and yells " hey mate guess who I'm shagging: froggg and Mick Brolly 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigfella Posted August 4, 2019 Share Posted August 4, 2019 A sweater I bought was picking up static electricity. So, I returned it to the store. They gave me another one free of charge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uttoxram75 Posted August 8, 2019 Share Posted August 8, 2019 I noticed a load of random items on my bank statement, (size 80 shoes, a bicycle horn, a huge plastic flower). I contacted my bank and apparently my card has been clowned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i-Ram Posted August 8, 2019 Share Posted August 8, 2019 3 minutes ago, uttoxram75 said: I noticed a load of random items on my bank statement, (size 80 shoes, a bicycle horn, a huge plastic flower). I contacted my bank and apparently my card has been clowned. uttoxram75 and Steve How Hard? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Kevin Posted August 9, 2019 Share Posted August 9, 2019 Eileen and her husband Bob went for counseling after 25 years of marriage. When asked what the problem was, Eileen went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 25 years they had been married. She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage. Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking Eileen to stand, embraced her, unbuttoned her blouse and bra, put his hands on her breasts and massaged them thoroughly, while kissing her passionately as her husband Bob watched with a raised eyebrow! Eileen shut up, buttoned up her blouse, and quietly sat down while basking in the glow of being highly aroused. The therapist turned to Bob and said, 'This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?' Bob thought for a moment and replied, 'Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I play golf. froggg and Steve How Hard? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
froggg Posted August 12, 2019 Share Posted August 12, 2019 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kinder Posted August 14, 2019 Share Posted August 14, 2019 (edited) I was just speaking to a Chinese drug dealer. He said “Have you see my cocaine?” I said “Not since he starred in the Italian Job.” Edited August 14, 2019 by Kinder Hinzy9, Mucker1884, i-Ram and 5 others 1 5 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bwash_Ram Posted August 15, 2019 Share Posted August 15, 2019 (edited) Just had an email from Trip Advisor; They recommend. L.S.D Edited August 15, 2019 by Bwash_Ram Steve How Hard? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bwash_Ram Posted August 15, 2019 Share Posted August 15, 2019 Alph, EtoileSportiveDeDerby, Hathersage Ram and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stive Pesley Posted August 15, 2019 Share Posted August 15, 2019 Q. What do you get if you cross Donald Trump and Prince Andrew A. Found in your cell, unresponsive... Rev 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Kevin Posted August 15, 2019 Share Posted August 15, 2019 Wife :I've got a bag of old clothes I'd like to donate. Husband:why not just throw them in the bin Wife:But there's poor starving people that would appreciate them Husband:Honey if they fit in your old clothes they ain't starving Wolfie 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bwash_Ram Posted August 18, 2019 Share Posted August 18, 2019 A few years ago I invented a beach footwear for people with one leg.. it was a flop i-Ram, I know nothing, Steve How Hard? and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bwash_Ram Posted August 18, 2019 Share Posted August 18, 2019 Pearl Ram 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bwash_Ram Posted August 18, 2019 Share Posted August 18, 2019 Steve How Hard?, Kinder and Pearl Ram 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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