David Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 After my recent trip to the dentist I requested sugar free sweets on the shopping, the missus obliged and returned home with several small boxes of sugar sweets. Now I like to suck a lot, I'm always sucking something. Yesterday I went to toilet and had the biggest exlplosion known to mankind, I've been sore since. Fearing but excitedily expecting a denture in the pan which failed to materialise in several explosive trips later. Xmas day has been a write off, I've been sofa bound with a hot water and quilt bottle all day whilst making trips to the toilet every half hour. As I reached for my second packet to suck, you know how you flip the box round and read the ingredients out of boredom I see this warning. ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uttoxram75 Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 late push for the darwin awards....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LesterRam Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 21 minutes ago, David said: After my recent trip to the dentist I requested sugar free sweets on the shopping, the missus obliged and returned home with several small boxes of sugar sweets. Now I like to suck a lot, I'm always sucking something. Yesterday I went to toilet and had the biggest exlplosion known to mankind, I've been sore since. Fearing but excitedily expecting a denture in the pan which failed to materialise in several explosive trips later. Xmas day has been a write off, I've been sofa bound with a hot water and quilt bottle all day whilst making trips to the toilet every half hour. As I reached for my second packet to suck, you know how you flip the box round and read the ingredients out of boredom I see this warning. ? If you cant take it you shouldn't give it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GboroRam Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 51 minutes ago, uttoxram75 said: late push for the darwin awards....... Too many of them and pushing isn't necessary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boycie Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 Lots of sweets have that warning, I think polos do too. suck on a fishermans friend. i know you used to go night fishing, I bet you sucked a few then no? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Posted December 25, 2016 Author Share Posted December 25, 2016 6 minutes ago, Boycie said: Lots of sweets have that warning, I think polos do too. suck on a fishermans friend. i know you used to go night fishing, I bet you sucked a few then no? That's why I don't have mints and used to suck on maggots Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sage Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 I didn't realise 'sweets' was your nickname for Boycie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Posted December 25, 2016 Author Share Posted December 25, 2016 Sweetcheeks takes too long to say so I shortened it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sage Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 2 minutes ago, David said: Sweetcheeks takes too long to say so I shortened it Hard to say with your mouth full I suppose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ariotofmyown Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 9 minutes ago, sage said: Hard to say with your mouth full I suppose. Partly full Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boycie Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 You dirty filthy schweinhund pig dogs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sage Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 32 minutes ago, ariotofmyown said: Partly full David has a small mouth. Small but pretty. Anyway....moving on...i like sports and beer...ahem Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 1 hour ago, sage said: David has a small mouth. Small but pretty. Anyway....moving on...i like sports and beer...ahem What? Are you a follower of the lavender pathway? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sage Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 2 minutes ago, Strange yearnings said: What? Are you a follower of the lavender pathway? No. i made that clear. I like sport and beer....and poetry and sunsets...oh **** Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coneheadjohn Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 Man nappy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Le Mesmer Posted December 25, 2016 Share Posted December 25, 2016 3 hours ago, ariotofmyown said: Partly full Had me in stitches this for some reason. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Posted December 26, 2016 Author Share Posted December 26, 2016 After binning the ******** and necking water all night the desire to go to toilet and pain is fading away. Stay away from sugar free sweets boys and girls. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
richinspain Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 3 hours ago, David said: After binning the ******** and necking water all night the desire to go to toilet and pain is fading away. Stay away from sugar free sweets boys and girls. The perils of addiction!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boycie Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 Get some lollipops. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McRamFan Posted December 27, 2016 Share Posted December 27, 2016 On 25/12/2016 at 20:42, Boycie said: You dirty filthy schweinhund pig dogs. Safe word? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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