A few years ago I was trying to open the wax seal on a miniature bottle of whisky. So I got a sharp knife and positioned the bottle on my leg. The inevitable happened and I stabbed myself in the leg. Fortunately I missed anything vital but there was a lot of blood, so I drank the whisky and eventually stopped the bleeding with a wad of kitchen roll and bandage.
When I pulled these off in the morning it started pouring blood again, so I took myself down to A&E and got it stitched up. To add insult to injury, when I told my brother he wet himself laughing and told me that if you twist