Ramshankered

Stick with it mate. These things can just be teething issues as you try and get used to each other's habits, etc. 
I've been with my other half for six years now. The first 3-6 months were wobbly AF tho! 

obviously, suicide and men's mental health is getting a lot of airtime at the moment. There's a storyline in one of the soaps, and in local news, a Derby County employee has set up a group to help men talk about depression etc.
It's probably still too taboo for many, and I imagine lots of people feel uncomfortable showing (perceived) weakness.
From my own experience, the first step is self awareness. I am convinced that until something clicked in my head, I would've been adamant I was okay and not suffering from any kind of low mood or depression or mental health issues. Then all of a sudden, I was aware that I was not okay.
One of the best things I ever did was create this thread. I play it down now, but at the time, I was utterly scrambled in the brain. Some of the responses, even the most obviously simplistic, pieced my brain back together. The best bit of advice being to add exercise to your routine.
I also am not aware of the part alcohol has to play in mental health, or at least in mine. I now no longer drink for drinking sake, there has to be an event (birthday, wedding etc) otherwise I won't have a reason to drink and I have be celebrating something to be drinking now, this has helped me immeasurably.
I hope the rest of the dcfcfans community is in good spirits and are coping well with life's challenges. If you need to vent or talk or just get a perspective, please, just blurt it out, there's nothing to lose, as one thing is for certain here, nobody will judge you badly, you will only feel compassion and support from other posters.
It's okay to not be okay X

Love Wirksworth. Proper quaint Derbyshire peak town.

Very, very late reply but thanks for this – she's got a meeting soon with her line manager (poor sod), so she'll be going in all gun's blazing. 

I was the same when I was off, Paul. I could go along for days at a time being fine, wondering why I was even off, but then a meeting, medical appointment, letter or seeing a kid from school, would bring on debilitating panic attacks. 
I think the thing to remember is that your nervous system has been overloaded and it takes time to recover sufficiently if you are going to go back into the same environment. The rule of thumb is that you need the same time in recovery as you had under stress. Even when you are feeling ok doing unrelated things, the threat of going back to the stressful situation can trigger a relapse.
Unfortunately for me, my school refused to implement the recommendations of occupational health, so I knew I was going to end up with the same problems again. They effectively kept me under the same conditions of stress for the year that I was off ‘recovering’, because every absence monitoring meeting was a threat of either losing my livelihood or being made ill. Eventually, for my own sanity, I had to stop going to the meetings and resign, which is why ACAS said I could have taken them for constructive dismissal if I’d been able to afford to go to a tribunal. 
The analogy with a broken leg holds pretty true. It takes a given time to mend and if you put pressure on it too soon it’s going to go again or not heal properly. 

More than half of teachers have been diagnosed with mental health issues:
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/uk-teachers-mental-health-diagnose-issues-targets-education-school-pupils-exams-a8174101.html

Even if it’s unintentional her approach is still having a negative affect on your gf’s working life, which can’t be good for the school either. You'd hope that a good Head would at least offer guidance to the HoD and reassurance and support to your partner. As others have said, it’s stressful enough without having someone on your back all the time.
Having been part of a department that went from being close knit, positive and supportive to a majority being ill and/or leaving within the space of a year, I’ve seen the impact a poor HoD can have. I really hope it gets sorted for her. 

Thanks man. It's up and down at the moment. Yesterday she came in 8pm (having starting work at 8am) and was pretty upset about it all. The really frustrating thing for me is, there's little I can do to influence things other than lend an ear when she needs to vent. 

Tell her to keep her head down,they never hang around long,they usually promote them to get rid...hope she’s ok.

My girlfriend is having similar problems at the moment. New head of department is creating work for the sake of it – asking for schemes of work to be re-written in a new (ridiculously long) format. Nothing wrong with the old format. She's just trying to stamp her mark on things to make herself feel important and relevant.
 

My girlfriend is having similar problems at the moment. New head of department is creating work for the sake of it – asking for schemes of work to be re-written in a new (ridiculously long) format. Nothing wrong with the old format. She's just trying to stamp her mark on things to make herself feel important and relevant.
 

Just get out of teaching before it makes you really ill. You don’t realise how much damage you’re doing yourself by forcing yourself to carry on when it’s making you feel like that.
I carried on until I started getting migraines every week. Eventually I went to the doctor, who signed me off for six months. That was three years ago... I never went back. Once I stopped I completely collapsed; I hardly left the house for the first three months. 
I doesn’t matter what noises people make, if you don’t feel supported then you’re not being, at least not in the way that is right for you. We had a new department head, and within one year three of us had gone off with long term stress conditions and a further seven resigned or took early retirement. 
The pressure is immense and the whole system is absurd, in my opinion. You mustn’t feel that it is your individual weakness that is making you struggle, it is actually the ones who are strong enough to keep going when the situation is awful  who end up suffering like this. 
I have several friends who have been through it, got out of teaching and never looked back. I know it seems impossible when you rely on your salary, but there’s always a way and nothing is more important than your health. 

Heard good things about Resistance. Not played it yet though. Tbf, it says a lot that boardgames aren't your thing but you can still get a kick out of a game like Dead of Winter. 
Pandemic's pretty good as a gateway game much like The Resistance. Once you and your lad have played a few rounds, I'd recommend picking up the terrorist expansion – adds a whole new dimension to the gameplay when one of you is trying to ruin everyone else's day!  

My 14yo lad loves board games, we got him Dead of Winter last year and Pandemic this year (he usually takes them round to his Grandads at the weekend!) as birthday presents
Not a huge fan of board games myself but Dead of Winter is pretty good as is The Resistance (not played Pandemic yet), I actually had a lot of fun playing that last Christmas! I enjoy deceiving my fellow players to reach the victory goal purely for myself 
Anyway, links to games are here. Other shops are available!
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Plaid-Hat-Games-Winter-Crossroads/dp/B00HFKITJC/ref=sr_1_1?s=kids&ie=UTF8&qid=1516360043&sr=1-1&keywords=dead+of+winter
https://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Resistance-RES2IBC-Board-Game/dp/B008A2BA8G/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1516360026&sr=8-1&keywords=the+resistance
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Z-Man-Games-ZMG71100-Pandemic-Board/dp/B00A2HD40E/ref=sr_1_1?s=kids&ie=UTF8&qid=1516360070&sr=1-1&keywords=pandemic

Can I also suggest
https://www.spiritgames.co.uk/
A great Board Game shop in Burton

Not D&D, but a mate of mind has rekindled my interest in some of the more obscure Games Workshop games. 
Currently painting up a Blood Bowl team in DCFC colours. 
I'm also a fan of board games. Things like Pandemic and Dead of Winter.

Brilliant, thank you! 

There's been a massive resurgence in board game systems the last few years. Stuff that's more fun / complex than classics like Monopoly and Cluedo. 
I'd recommend having a browse of https://www.shutupandsitdown.com/ - great site for video reviews and news.
Pandemic is a co-op game where you work together to prevent the outbreak of a deadly disease across the globe: http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2013-07-17-pandemic-review
For Dead of Winter, think zombies! It's another co-op game, where you work together to keep the team alive – gathering food and medicine, while fighting zombies. The twist is, each of you have a secret objective – some are innocent (e.g. you hoard food, so you need to secretly stash supplies), others more sinister (e.g. you want to get everyone else eaten by zombies!). There's usually a good dose of paranoia in each game: https://www.shutupandsitdown.com/videos/review-dead-winter/

There's been a massive resurgence in board game systems the last few years. Stuff that's more fun / complex than classics like Monopoly and Cluedo. 
I'd recommend having a browse of https://www.shutupandsitdown.com/ - great site for video reviews and news.
Pandemic is a co-op game where you work together to prevent the outbreak of a deadly disease across the globe: http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2013-07-17-pandemic-review
For Dead of Winter, think zombies! It's another co-op game, where you work together to keep the team alive – gathering food and medicine, while fighting zombies. The twist is, each of you have a secret objective – some are innocent (e.g. you hoard food, so you need to secretly stash supplies), others more sinister (e.g. you want to get everyone else eaten by zombies!). There's usually a good dose of paranoia in each game: https://www.shutupandsitdown.com/videos/review-dead-winter/

They're not toys - they're figurines 
You young whippersnappers have no idea what it was like when the only computer game was a Binatone bat and ball, and Sunday evening TV highlights were Penelope Keith in "To the Manor Born".
but yes, looking back on it I'm quite content to be a figure(ine) of fun

Not D&D, but a mate of mind has rekindled my interest in some of the more obscure Games Workshop games. 
Currently painting up a Blood Bowl team in DCFC colours. 
I'm also a fan of board games. Things like Pandemic and Dead of Winter.

The War on Drugs. Ruddy love this song. 
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bsoqmFL1vlU
 
Can someone shine a light on how I embed the video in the post?
 

Kestrel
 
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