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Smyth_18

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  1. Like
    Smyth_18 reacted to DarkFruitsRam7 in If you had to pick one...   
    Ours are exactly the same!
    There you go, @Smyth_18. Done my job.
  2. Like
    Smyth_18 reacted to Alpha in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    That's the journey though, mate. Don't try and take the shortcut to happiness skipping through meadows with flowers in your hair. Take on the next day. Face the most immediate challenge. 
    It's when people think they're 10ft tall and bulletproof (or that they should be) that they start fighting battles on all fronts. Just face one thing at a time. Small victories like beating a day at work are significant 
  3. Like
    Smyth_18 reacted to Van Cone De Head in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    That’s the positive mate,seems like the last thing you want to do but try and keep going.
  4. Sad
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from Paul71 in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    We've had one good day since the 12th December which luckily was yesterday and we feel very blessed for that on the most festive of days. The wife is far from 100% today and I came down with a sickness bug in the night. What a Christmas! Now to attempt a day at work tomorrow.
  5. Sad
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from DarkFruitsRam7 in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    We've had one good day since the 12th December which luckily was yesterday and we feel very blessed for that on the most festive of days. The wife is far from 100% today and I came down with a sickness bug in the night. What a Christmas! Now to attempt a day at work tomorrow.
  6. Sad
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from I know nothing in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    I force myself to try and look at everything in a positive light. I try to be a good person every single day. Sometimes it seems like I'm getting somewhere. Then I get hit harder than ever.
    This week has been such a long story but to cut it short, my wife is not in a good way. It started with a twitching eye on Wednesday but has moved on to full blown facial paralysis and now full body tremors. I've just had to transport her to bed. The past few days I've had next to no sleep with hospital visits. Getting nowhere with wards contradicting eachother. As well as taking care of a potentially autistic 2 and a half year old. Yes we have help but not enough. It can be a hindrance at times.
    How am I supposed to go back to work and actually earn money to live too? 
  7. Sad
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from Mucker1884 in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    We've had one good day since the 12th December which luckily was yesterday and we feel very blessed for that on the most festive of days. The wife is far from 100% today and I came down with a sickness bug in the night. What a Christmas! Now to attempt a day at work tomorrow.
  8. Like
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from CWC1983 in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    We've had one good day since the 12th December which luckily was yesterday and we feel very blessed for that on the most festive of days. The wife is far from 100% today and I came down with a sickness bug in the night. What a Christmas! Now to attempt a day at work tomorrow.
  9. Like
    Smyth_18 reacted to Mucker1884 in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    So, yer mam dies in her early 40's, when you are 16.  2 years later, yer dad dies, still in his 40's, albeit 49.  This leaves you, as an 18 year old only boy, 3 elder sisters (21, 24 & 27), and the baby of the bunch, little sis who is still only 9 at this stage.
    I guess what happens next is you start to wonder... will I manage to live a bit longer than my parents?... who will be the first sibling to cop it... and when!
    Those thoughts have never left me.  4 of us have since lived longer than our parents, thankfully.  Baby sis has now lived longer than mum, and is closing in on the age dad was, so all good there, I guess.
    I have to admit, on the day I equalled Dad's age, I was a little bit emotional, if truth be told.  Relief?  Guilt?  No idea, but it was a weird feeling!
    But the one thing I have literally been dreading since being left an "orphan"... over 39 years ago now... is the first of us siblings going. 
    ...It happened last night! 

    The sister up from me (so the third eldest) lasted until she was 60.... and two months.  I guess we shouldn't moan, given the family history, but I can't describe the gut-wrenching feeling, now the first one of us has gone!  This is the day I have been dreading for over 39 bloody years!
    Depressed?  No.  Not in the true sense.
    Anxious?  You bet!
    Stress?  Not yet, but I'm sure that will come, as we try and help our 24 year old nephew (Sis's only child) through the next few days, weeks, and maybe even years.  Lot's to do.  Lot's to sort out.  Him and us.  There's no-one else to do it!
    The first of my siblings gone... out of the blue... no warning!  Suddenly, I no longer feel immortal!
    Eldest sis (67 next month) is feeling guilty, not being the first to go!
    Baby sis is distraught, and now has to face her first close-relative mourning since becoming a 9 year old orphan!
    Being old fashioned, I feel the need to take the lead.  To be practical.  The only boy, and all that!  Time to become a man!  Time to take charge, I guess, and stay strong for my remaining 3 sisters, and my nephew... but I can't help but feel vulnerable this morning, if truth be told.
    Thankfully, I have the strongest, most wonderful wife tight by my side, so all is not lost!
    I'm sure I'm not the first to lose a sibling, of course, but right now, feeling the way I do, a feeling I've never experienced before, is daunting to say the least.
    It feels different to losing a parent.  It feels different to losing a granddaughter at 1 hour old.  Maybe not worse.  Maybe not easier.  But closer, I guess.  More frightening.  Too close for comfort!
    Not looking for sympathy.  Just an ear.  Just a shoulder to lean on.  I may be back, I may not.  Having not been through this particular emotion, I really don't know what happens next!
     
    PS:
    Yes... yesterday's game really was poo, wasn't it!
     
  10. Clap
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from 1967Ram in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    Just want to make a quick point whilst i think about it because i believe this to be VERY important.
    Yesterday, looking back at my activity on the forum i was probably at my wittiest (if i do say so myself) and seemingly happiest.
    This couldn't be further from the truth.
    I spent most of the day waiting on a phone call from my Mum as my Grandma was in hospital getting results from some tests. All day i was in another world with worry. This forum, in particular the Paddy Padster thread was a huge outlet for me in which i genuinely enjoyed in the midst of worry.
    There isn't a particularly happy ending to the day either as it seems the results showed cancer. The rest of the day was a blur of giving support and trying to process the news for myself.
     
    I suppose the message is... You really don't know what is going on at the other side of peoples computer screens, so try and be nice to each other.
     
    Also, i suppose i should offer a bit of thanks to @David . For giving us this outlet. However, i must stress, this is the only thing you're good for.
  11. Like
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from Needlesh in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    Just read this and it was a bit of comfort. Thank you.
  12. Sad
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from Steve How Hard? in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    I force myself to try and look at everything in a positive light. I try to be a good person every single day. Sometimes it seems like I'm getting somewhere. Then I get hit harder than ever.
    This week has been such a long story but to cut it short, my wife is not in a good way. It started with a twitching eye on Wednesday but has moved on to full blown facial paralysis and now full body tremors. I've just had to transport her to bed. The past few days I've had next to no sleep with hospital visits. Getting nowhere with wards contradicting eachother. As well as taking care of a potentially autistic 2 and a half year old. Yes we have help but not enough. It can be a hindrance at times.
    How am I supposed to go back to work and actually earn money to live too? 
  13. Like
    Smyth_18 reacted to RoyMac5 in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    Thanks for saying such a positive message, @Smyth_18 you must be having an unbelievably difficult time. I wish you nothing but the best. I hope things turn around for you soon mate.
  14. Sad
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from DarkFruitsRam7 in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    I force myself to try and look at everything in a positive light. I try to be a good person every single day. Sometimes it seems like I'm getting somewhere. Then I get hit harder than ever.
    This week has been such a long story but to cut it short, my wife is not in a good way. It started with a twitching eye on Wednesday but has moved on to full blown facial paralysis and now full body tremors. I've just had to transport her to bed. The past few days I've had next to no sleep with hospital visits. Getting nowhere with wards contradicting eachother. As well as taking care of a potentially autistic 2 and a half year old. Yes we have help but not enough. It can be a hindrance at times.
    How am I supposed to go back to work and actually earn money to live too? 
  15. Sad
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from Mucker1884 in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    I force myself to try and look at everything in a positive light. I try to be a good person every single day. Sometimes it seems like I'm getting somewhere. Then I get hit harder than ever.
    This week has been such a long story but to cut it short, my wife is not in a good way. It started with a twitching eye on Wednesday but has moved on to full blown facial paralysis and now full body tremors. I've just had to transport her to bed. The past few days I've had next to no sleep with hospital visits. Getting nowhere with wards contradicting eachother. As well as taking care of a potentially autistic 2 and a half year old. Yes we have help but not enough. It can be a hindrance at times.
    How am I supposed to go back to work and actually earn money to live too? 
  16. Sad
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from Needlesh in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    I force myself to try and look at everything in a positive light. I try to be a good person every single day. Sometimes it seems like I'm getting somewhere. Then I get hit harder than ever.
    This week has been such a long story but to cut it short, my wife is not in a good way. It started with a twitching eye on Wednesday but has moved on to full blown facial paralysis and now full body tremors. I've just had to transport her to bed. The past few days I've had next to no sleep with hospital visits. Getting nowhere with wards contradicting eachother. As well as taking care of a potentially autistic 2 and a half year old. Yes we have help but not enough. It can be a hindrance at times.
    How am I supposed to go back to work and actually earn money to live too? 
  17. Like
    Smyth_18 reacted to i-Ram in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    Look after yourself buddy; stay strong.  The Hospital will hopefully get to grips with the issue quickly, and you must try to be positive for both your wife and child. Your wife in particular will need great reassurance at this time.  
  18. Sad
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from RoyMac5 in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    I force myself to try and look at everything in a positive light. I try to be a good person every single day. Sometimes it seems like I'm getting somewhere. Then I get hit harder than ever.
    This week has been such a long story but to cut it short, my wife is not in a good way. It started with a twitching eye on Wednesday but has moved on to full blown facial paralysis and now full body tremors. I've just had to transport her to bed. The past few days I've had next to no sleep with hospital visits. Getting nowhere with wards contradicting eachother. As well as taking care of a potentially autistic 2 and a half year old. Yes we have help but not enough. It can be a hindrance at times.
    How am I supposed to go back to work and actually earn money to live too? 
  19. Sad
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from Mostyn6 in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    I force myself to try and look at everything in a positive light. I try to be a good person every single day. Sometimes it seems like I'm getting somewhere. Then I get hit harder than ever.
    This week has been such a long story but to cut it short, my wife is not in a good way. It started with a twitching eye on Wednesday but has moved on to full blown facial paralysis and now full body tremors. I've just had to transport her to bed. The past few days I've had next to no sleep with hospital visits. Getting nowhere with wards contradicting eachother. As well as taking care of a potentially autistic 2 and a half year old. Yes we have help but not enough. It can be a hindrance at times.
    How am I supposed to go back to work and actually earn money to live too? 
  20. Like
    Smyth_18 reacted to Needlesh in Depression, anxiety, stress and other related issues   
    I've had some issues and posted a little about my late wife's cancer, ultimately being bereaved, the struggles I had to cope as a single dad of bereaved children and how it nearly finally broke me and how hard it hit me when my dog got sick this summer. 
    I thought I'd just share that I met a lovely widowed lady my age a couple of months ago, and she makes me happy. I make her happy. We're a couple now. Things can and do get better, no matter what life throws at you, you can smile again. Hang in there people.
  21. Haha
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from LeedsCityRam in Jim Smith   
    It helps that Leicester's biggest legend is still playing for them every week too!
  22. Clap
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from Theres’s Only Wan Chope in Jim Smith   
    It helps that Leicester's biggest legend is still playing for them every week too!
  23. Like
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from Ellafella in Jim Smith   
    This time 20 years ago, having been in love with Derby County on the radio and TV for 2 years, I was magically excited to get absolutely everything Derby related for Christmas. The kits, DCFC goalkeeper gloves, framed photo of pride park, bed covers, sunglasses, videos, mugs, pencils, chocolates, you name it.
    Late on Christmas Day I went to my Dad's house for the next batch of presents (the perks of separated parents). Yet more Derby related items until finally, one big box. I open the box which seems empty but for an envelope. Within that envelope was 2 tickets to see Derby County at Pride Park the following day. To this day I don't think I have ever been so innocently excited.
    This love was created by Mr Jim Smith. None of my family was Derby fans. I long for my son to feel that pure excitement on whatever he chooses to enjoy in life.
    Thank you for my first love which will never leave me Jim Smith. Fly high bald eagle.
  24. Like
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from angieram in Jim Smith   
    This time 20 years ago, having been in love with Derby County on the radio and TV for 2 years, I was magically excited to get absolutely everything Derby related for Christmas. The kits, DCFC goalkeeper gloves, framed photo of pride park, bed covers, sunglasses, videos, mugs, pencils, chocolates, you name it.
    Late on Christmas Day I went to my Dad's house for the next batch of presents (the perks of separated parents). Yet more Derby related items until finally, one big box. I open the box which seems empty but for an envelope. Within that envelope was 2 tickets to see Derby County at Pride Park the following day. To this day I don't think I have ever been so innocently excited.
    This love was created by Mr Jim Smith. None of my family was Derby fans. I long for my son to feel that pure excitement on whatever he chooses to enjoy in life.
    Thank you for my first love which will never leave me Jim Smith. Fly high bald eagle.
  25. Like
    Smyth_18 got a reaction from John Doe in Jim Smith   
    This time 20 years ago, having been in love with Derby County on the radio and TV for 2 years, I was magically excited to get absolutely everything Derby related for Christmas. The kits, DCFC goalkeeper gloves, framed photo of pride park, bed covers, sunglasses, videos, mugs, pencils, chocolates, you name it.
    Late on Christmas Day I went to my Dad's house for the next batch of presents (the perks of separated parents). Yet more Derby related items until finally, one big box. I open the box which seems empty but for an envelope. Within that envelope was 2 tickets to see Derby County at Pride Park the following day. To this day I don't think I have ever been so innocently excited.
    This love was created by Mr Jim Smith. None of my family was Derby fans. I long for my son to feel that pure excitement on whatever he chooses to enjoy in life.
    Thank you for my first love which will never leave me Jim Smith. Fly high bald eagle.
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